Hypno's "me, me, me, me, me," diary.....

SarahNeedle1872

elsie52 wrote: »

Hi Hypno,

Here I am again, slinking in out of lurking mode. I just wanted to share my thoughts with you and tell you my story. I am a m.i.l, and when my son and d.i.l seperated, I was devastated. I didn't know anything about it until my son had moved out....... I was so very angry with him,..I felt responsible in a way for not realizing that they were having problems, but they knew that I would worry so decided not to tell me unil after the event. I really didn't know what to say to either of them. My son left and I couldn't get my head around it, he wasn't that kind of person, but only after about 2 years, I was told why he did it, and I understood.............I understood, but still didn't like it,....he had children, my grandchildren and in my eyes they needed 2 parents........I blamed them both, silently........I tried to keep on the fence......didn't want to upset either of them in case it caused problems with us being able to have/see the children..........I felt a sense of loyalty to my son, and also felt sorry for d.i.l, after all without her, I wouldn't have my grandchildren, whom we adore.

Now, five years later all seems to have settled down, they are divorced, both have new partners, and occasionally, a disagreement will blow up between them. We get to see our grandchildren as much as before, and take them on holiday.....our d.i.l could have been difficult with us, but we still buy birthday and christmas presents, and although our relationship has changed, we still care for her, and I believe she cares for us, as I said before, she is the mother of our grandchildren and for that I will be eternally grateful to her.

I hope that you and your m.i.l can still have an amicable relationship, perhaps not straight away, but eventually.

What a lovely post.... I may have shed a tear reading it

Sx

spud30

Hugs ~Hypno, hope you're OK and dont lurk too long chick :grouphug:

Elsie, I really wish my MiL was like you. Mine asked my DH to choose between me and our kids, and her. He did

redsquirrel80

Big hugs to you, hope you are back soon, but more importantly hope you can sort things out however you need to soon xx

InaPickle

spud30 wrote: »

Hugs ~Hypno, hope you're OK and dont lurk too long chick :grouphug:

Elsie, I really wish my MiL was like you. Mine asked my DH to choose between me and our kids, and her. He did

What is it with people like that? Don't they get that it generally doesn't go their way?

spud30

InaPickle wrote: »

What is it with people like that? Don't they get that it generally doesn't go their way?

She's very selfish Pickle. She wanted him to go back home to look after her, wasnt at all bothered what effect it might have on her grandchildren :mad:

Anyhoo, she hasnt seen us or the kids in over 8 years

beanielou

Take care xx

In_my_dreams

Hypno - sorry I haven't posted for a few days. Hope you find the time out useful, please take care of yourself and give yourself time to recover and grieve the loss that you have suffered. (((((Hugs)))))

elsie52

Spud - she sounds a very selfish person, doesn't she realize that she is missing out on such a lot, and at the end of the day, we don't have children to look after us in our old age.....its the last thing that I would want. I believe that if you really are a " mother ".....you want what is best for your children, and that is not always best for you, but that's just the way it is.

I don't think your kids have missed out by not seeing her......

What I was really trying to say to Hypno, is that both her mum and m.i.l. may also be feeling upset for her, as well as for themselves........things have a knock on effect don't they....... so perhaps thy won't know what to say or do for the best.

The_Dragon

Hypno huge hugs and will see you when you get back. I just pm'd you with a Chickpea and Tomato Curry recipe - but did that before I read you needed some time out

[Deleted User]

Hi Hypno,

Just nipping on to say that I have chocolate chip, chocolate cakes with double fudge icing and chocolate sprinkles with the kids if you want one?

Hope you're okay and that your visit went okay?

Tea
x