Advice about my daughter predicament.

bestpud

I have nothing at all constructive to add but to say I don't blame her for not wanting to have another child while she is experiencing all this, but she may well change her mind once the baby is here.

I've known several people say they won't when they are going through it but then think it was all worth it when they want another a few years down the line.

I can say for sure I would only have one child if I was that ill though! I take my hat off to all who suffer like that! _pale_

As for the partner, he may be a better dad than he is 'nurse'... I hope so anyway. What an awful situation. It sounds as though his family may be influencing his opinion by giving their uneducated viewpoint!

sp1987

On a complete sidenote, if your daughter is terrified of needles and refuses blood tests, ensure she sees the midwife and has all her urine tests done. I am personally awful with needles too (no family history with me either!). I managed to have three of the four blood tests during pregnancy (god only knows how) but flatly refused to have the one I 'needed' after birth as it would only affect me, not my child...I'd had quite enough needles (caesarean).

If she goes to her routine appointments she may be able to avoid as many needles as possible (rehydration drips, blood tests, etc). I know needle phobia seems mad to most people but if you are needle phobic being severely ill is no more of a punishment. I always go very faint/sweaty during and after any injection and can be sick/pass out as applicable. I find having food for the 10 mins before the injection (for me chocolate, crisps and ribena) and something to drink the second the needle is out helps with that a lot.

I really feel for her as being constantly sick and phobic of medical intervention must just be the worst!

Cacran

Thanks for your replies.
They signed up for 6months on the flat before they knew she was pregnant and could not get out of it. The 6 months will be up before the baby is born so they had planned to get something more baby friendly and nearer to his work and to both families. The problem with the flat is that she is very poorly at present and it would not be good for her to be there.
I don't think she will forget how bad the pregnancy is as she has been in bed and sick for half way through almost and we don't know what the rest of the time will bring. I know it would do my head in.
She has been to the doctors for every appointment that has been asked of her, except the midwife this week. she has had all the blood tests that have been advised that she has. The doctor just feels she has to wait it out. Her bloods were okay, her blood pressure fine, but last time her heart was racing. the doctor said she has to avoid any stress. The stress has been forced upon her really, BF knows the doctor said that but has continued to reveal his emotions. I do beleive that he would have been a good father once the baby arrived but really you do need more support when times are bad. It will be hard to forgive. What if anything else untowards happened in the future. Life throws all sorts of problems at you, doesn't it. A couple need to support one another, not crumble at the first hurdle.
Now as far as I can see she is begging him to stay with her. I think that is the last thing she needs to do.
I am hoping that common sense will prevail either way. We will seek some advice if she is going to be on her own. Perhaps the midwife might have a chat and help her.