House or Wedding?

Fire_Fox

You need to ask yourself whether a wedding day or being married is more important to you.

pie81

This may sound joyless but with personal debt and negative equity plus a desire to move somewhere bigger, it doesn't sound like a good time to be spending £12k on a wedding. I'd focus on getting the debt paid off and an equity pot as a deposit for the next place built up first.

However that doesn't mean you have to put off getting married. It's the big party that costs the money not the wedding ceremony itself. As people say you can have a "big" wedding for less than £12k.

Alternatively, how about having a small and cheap wedding now (for example, ceremony plus cocktails with your 20 closest people) and then planning a big bash for, say, your 5th anniversary, when you will hopefully have more money?

As regards getting advice on your general financial position, financial advisers can advise you but generally will charge for their advice. Mortgage brokers can give advice on your mortgage position - London & Country are a decent independent free broker.

Hope that helps.

bmunky7

From recent experience take your wedding budget and then add half again!! Mine went from £15k to £20k+ I lost count of the times I was told "but it's the only time we'll ever get married!"....who knows if that's true!!! But I'm glad to be married and have no regrets getting hitched before buying a place.

As for who to talk to, have you read through all the paperwork associated with your current place and approached whoever runs that scheme / whoever dealt with it in the first place for advice?

An independent mortgage advisor may be a good next step.

Jowo_2

The Wedding forum has excellent information how to hold fantastic weddings for less than 2k.

Oldernotwiser

I can never understand why a wedding day becomes more memorable the more money you throw at it;perhaps it says something about the relationship.

muskoka

I'd concentrate on clearing the debts, then have a registry office wedding with family, have a do/meal/whatever where guests buy their own drinks, then have a fab wedding/blessing (just the two of you) in some exotic location whilst your on honeymoon. Cost a damn sight less than 12K

BexInLondon

Just to echo that... ours cost sub 3k and was very memorable! The most memorable bits were the stuff money can't buy though - heartfelt and hilarious speeches, my dad not having a clue where to stand, my mum having to borrow a bra from my bridesmaid because she hadn't thought about it, our first dance, subsequent dances involving hoodies and OAPs sharing the dancefloor. One of the best bits subsequently has been reading through all our cards and looking at the photos of who was there on the day. We had 250 people and a bring-and-share buffet which no-one minded. Don't let our ill society tell you what you have to spend to make something memorable! I mean that in the nicest possible way.

23rdspiral

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

A marriage is more important than a house but there are far more important things to a marriage than the wedding!

I'd say this is one of the truest things i've heard said here or anywhere.

i thought we'd gone for a 25 yr mortgage instead of a wedding - much more of a commitment looking at the divorce stats these days!

1/4 of the way through the mortgage, he asked me to marry him! i said yes, but now we want to move again and the wedding idea is on hold... it really is all about your personal priorities. good luck figuring that out.

clearing_out_my_pockets

Hi - I am slightly in the same boat as you so thought I'd let you know what we are doing.

My OH & I have been together for approaching 3 years. We don't live together as neither of us really believe in renting & we want to save as much of a deposit as we can. We got engaged in July last year. Since then, I have slightly reduced the amount I'm saving each month towards a deposit and put it to the wedding 'fund'. Being realistic, we'll be moving in together within six months and married by May 2011. We have worked out what we can save in that time and whatever that will buy us will be our wedding day. Whatever we can't afford, we simply won't have. For reference, we're having a church wedding, a sit down meal for 62 people, evening buffet for 120, two wedding dresses, two best men, two bridesmaids, cupcake tower, fabours, etc for under £6,000.

To us, the important part is setting up home and having somewhere that we can call our own. The marriage is the icing on the cake - but if someone turns their nose up at our wedding, that's down to them.

DVardysShadow

stenweb wrote: »

Many thanks to the replies so far.... as for the wedding budget - obviously, I meant £12,000k....

Obviously. £12 does not get much of a wedding, so £12,000k it must be. Now if you cut back to £11,000k, you would have a million left which would buy you a decent weekday house and a little place in the country. Go for it, I'd say.