Positive vibes please - finally bitting the bullet

lynzpower

I dont think thats a bad plan at all. I have an account for my OH to pay his money into all the bills come out of that, never used the card, but havnet cut it up so I can use it to keep an eye on whats what.

the other thing is that is OH getting the cheapest deals for all your home utilities, phone etc. chances are probably not, so its worth shopping around on those, Ive saved a shed load since swapping and tarting a bit

CosmoCat

sending you positive vibes.

you should also remember that you are doing all of this for you. even the confession is for you. you are ready to face up to it and sort it and get yourself out of trouble. the outcome can only be positive in the long run.

all the best

dinkylou

Take a deep breath, make a cup of tea, listen to some nice music and relax.

We will all help you though this and you will feel much better once it is out in the open and you take steps to sorting it out.

Think of how happy you will feel when you have your baby and how your debt wont feel so important anymore.

After all, its only money.

scw1

He is pretty good at shopping around for best deals for the electric/gas/phone/internet etc I am just the one who is useless with money. Have text him now to tell him we need to talk about finances when I get home. Have been dropping hints all week so he knew this conversation would be coming soon! He is working until 9pm so when he comes home we will have a good chat and I might be chucked out of my house or something by the morning!

domestic_goddess

Good luck for tonight, I am sure it will go better than you are expecting, we can help with figures when you are able to post your soa, but in the mean time remember your baby is the most important thing at the moment so don't get overly stressed and take care of yourself.

P.s positive vibes on their way

tesuhoha

Yes I was just going to say calm down, have a nice cup of tea and put your feet up but dinkylou beat me to it. Ones of the ways to feel a bit better is to list the totals of your debt (on a spreadsheet if you have one otherwise on paper) and then at the end of each month list the new amount. That way you can see it going down steadily. As for you and your OH, the strongest and most organised one should take control of the finances. If that is him maybe it will appease him if you offer him full control of the money. Personally I could not bear to do that, but I like to organise everything. But if he would be better at paying off the debt than you and keeping a check on everything then maybe that would be an option.

tesuhoha

Maybe you could forewarn him by sending him a text sayijng something like 'Do you realise how bad it is?' and you might find that he is aware of more than you think

scw1

I have text him and said we need to talk about my finances I didnt realise how much they were and I have been such a tw*t. I am organised in every other aspect of my life apart from financially. I think it def stems from my childhood having nothing and then being offered all these credit cards and stupidly taking them up, buying things to cheer myself up when in the long run they have made me nothing but more miserable.

Have done a little spreadsheet and am now inputing the dreaded figures. Forgot to bring my loan details in so cant add that but have my credit card details so am putting that in. At the moment though I might be around £17k not £18k so I am £1,000 less than what I thought yipee (not!)

LJD1_2

Aw....i'm sending good vibes too. At least you're half way there by facing up to the problem. Like others have said, concentrate on your baby and keep remembering to breathe. At least with this out in the open now you'll be able to start sorting it out and sleep better. All the best for tonight xxxx

tesuhoha

Being aware of how much you owe is the first step towards becoming Debtfree.