Nursery abuse parents get choice

onetomany

Lip_Stick wrote: »

what is worse? Growing up with parents knowing you were abused and feeling those effects, knowing it too, or growing up as normal and in 20 years hearing about what happened but not having a clue if you were involved or not. If it doesn't effect the child then why bother?

I can't remember being one or two years old... can you?

i dont think there is a right or wrong anserw if the above was the case then i would expect the parents and child to get proffessional support x

onetomany

ovetta2001 wrote: »

My husband was abused at the age of 2. He remembers it. His family ignored it. He had to deal with it for a long time by himself. He suffers alot now from nightmares etc due to it being like a family no-no.

We have a 4 year old and if I was in that situation I would want to know. I would never tell him in less he brought it up but he would always have the help and support he needed.

i can go with this one i still have nightmares and i have found things out from my dreams xxxxx

onetomany

oh i just want to point out i have 2 boys who i would kill to protect x

Amistoso_2

I don't think this is the right place to be discussing this topic. It's getting way to personal. Perhaps this belongs on a familly oriented forum and not on a money saving one...

onetomany

yea i would like it closed please

dmg24

Lip_Stick wrote: »

Well maybe it was prolonged abuse in that case, but if it was something that happened once or twice I really don't see it imprinting on someone's memory at such a young age. A child of 2 years old? I really don't think would remmeber something in a one off situation.

Of course I could be wrong, I'm not a scientist in this field.

You are wrong, plenty of research in this area - perhaps you could actually do some research before making such wild assumptions in future?

Lip_Stick

dmg24 wrote: »

You are wrong, plenty of research in this area - perhaps you could actually do some research before making such wild assumptions in future?

lol... well I was slightly intoxicated last night (lil one was at his gran's) so I wouldn't take anything I discussed too seriously. I did in fact say I could be wrong though and it seems quite clear that I was just making assumptions.

Hmmm have googled, and can't find much in the way of research.

Edit - I would have thought that if the children were going to suffer as a result of the abuse, that the option to not be told, wouldn't be given. I'm thinking of the younger children.

peachyprice

ovetta2001 wrote: »

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8346537.stm

I don't believe the judge has passed this!!! I know I'm going to get arguments from this but its the children that need help. Why do the parents get to decide wheather or not to pretend it never happened and potentially stop their kids from getting the right help.

Grrr :mad:

Pretty sensible course of action IMO.

It's highly unlikely the children will remember anything, as they were so young at the time.

What 'help' do you believe can be given to babies and toddlers?

deefin

when i was 2 my dad put my head down the toilet and flushed it on my head , to this day ( im almost 44) im terrified of water spray in my face . its caused me no end of problems
even though it was never talked about i still remember it vividly