social fund help please

jennilb

Hi Cloverfan

I'm sorry about your loss.

Have you thought about asking friends / relatives if they could lend you something to wear? Or did you have an outfit that he liked / that you wore on a special occaision with him, that you could wear in his honour? I wore bright red shoes to my Grandma's funeral because she had liked them. Otherwise I think the ASDA suggestion is a good idea.

So far as flowers go, lots of people choose not to have flowers at funerals and decide to give money to charity instead, often one related to either their final loved ones' illness or something important to them when they were alive. You could decide to give a small donation on the anniversary of his death or his birthday, rather than feeling like you have to give it all in one go. Perhaps you could donate your time to a charity in honour of your father, rather than flowers?

I hope these suggestions help a little

Jenni

50plusabit

Clover
Im sorry for your loss, and hope it all goes well tomorrow. Just remember your Dad would be happy if you turned up in a bin bag, as long as you turned up to say goodbye. Try not to worry about the clothes you wear, more about remembering the day, dont take flowers, write a poem or short letter, and put it in a plastic wallet and everybody can enjoy it.

Some people on here should be ashamed, just because you offer advice, doesnt mean it right for everybody, this person is in a bad place at the minute, and is entitled to lash out, cut her some slack.......if you can then dont say anything.:mad:

DX2

50plusabit wrote: »

Some people on here should be ashamed, just because you offer advice, doesnt mean it right for everybody, this person is in a bad place at the minute, and is entitled to lash out, cut her some slack.......if you can then dont say anything.:mad:

To be fair the people that were offering advice were doing so on the little info that was given, had the OP started her post by saying my dad has passed away is there any help I could get re flowers and clothes as I am on Income support and struggling. No one knew.

I have an awfully bad habit of rooting around a person's post history if I'm bored enough.

viktory

50plusabit wrote: »

Some people on here should be ashamed, just because you offer advice, doesnt mean it right for everybody, this person is in a bad place at the minute, and is entitled to lash out, cut her some slack.......if you can then dont say anything.:mad:

I disagree and if you are referring to my post I am not in the least bit ashamed. Firstly, the OP gave no indication in her first post that someone so close to her had died. Secondly, I absolutely do not agree that because the OP has suffered a personal loss she should be allowed to 'lash out' - especially when the comments are both untrue. This is why I suggested she take a step back.

I will not be dictated to by you, or anyone else, as to what I can and can't post and when.

AsknAnswer

I don't see any judgemental posts on this thread other than the one from the OP herself, accusing people of being judgemental. Fair enough she is hurting at the moment and probably will for a long time to come. But let's just put this into perspective:

No Social Fund assistance would be granted for the items the OP has asked about (clothing and flowers) though she may be offered a Community Care Grant to travel to the funeral if she has no way of getting there. People have not only answered her question in stating she would not get help from the Social Fund (fact), they have also offered suggestions on how to buy flowers within her budget, how to make a wreath within her budget, and places to look for clothing within her budget.

Her question was answered factually with some helpful suggestions thrown in about how she can get these items cheaply.

I don't think anyone has been judgemental. I do think the OP did not get the answer she wanted. Would it have been better to ignore her question, or give an incorrect answer, knowing she would not qualify? Of course not, that would be utterly cruel.

Whilst the OP is grieving right now, she has no idea of the personal turmoil others on this board could also be experiencing right now, accuses people of behaving in a condeming manner when they have not, yet seems fit to condenm others herself. It works both ways.

OP I am deeply sorry to hear that you have lost your dad and at this moment your time can be better spent than reading into things on these boards, that aren't there and tying yourself up in knots about it. You can get these items very cheaply although now that I am aware you are due o go bankrupt, I do not know if you even have a spare couple of quid for a cheap bouquet. Although I did not know your father, I would think that he would be proud of you and very grateful too that you are trying to get some lovely flowers and dress smartly for your final goodbye to him. Whether you manage to get the items or not, you have tried and that is ultimately what matters, and if there is such a thing as being able to look down on you, your dad would see that you are trying. And you don't have to stop trying now. Once your BR is over, fresh slate, wipe it clean - and keep going. Make YOURSELF proud.

Kimberley

Cloverfan it may have been wiser to phone the Social fund up yourself to ask them your question. These sort of threads always end up with arguments.

Charity shops or even Freecycle may be able to help with the clothes. I can fully understand why you would want to go tidy and have flowers. Why not go to a florist and ask them if they can help you? They may come up with something for you on a budget.

KimYeovil

I trust you are not on Job Seekers? I thought a condition of receiving benefits is that you are actively seeking work? If you have no clothing fit to attend a funeral then you have no clothing fit for an interview.*

It doesn't even have to be a job interview. You have children? So you do not own any clothing fit to visit their teachers? What happens on parents days? Do the children travel to school/nursery by themselves? Or do you just go out in your pyjamas? You have no clothing fit to go out in the evening? Sorry, I just can not conceive how it is possible for a grown adult to not possess any suitable clothing.

Yes, you can receive a budgeting loan for clothing. But it takes time. A crisis loan will not be provided. And a single flower with a sealed note does not require a loan.

* It does not, of course, apply the other way round. It is possible to have an outfit suitable for a funeral which is inappropriate to wear to work.

McKneff

AsknAnswer wrote: »

I don't see any judgemental posts on this thread other than the one from the OP herself, accusing people of being judgemental. Fair enough she is hurting at the moment and probably will for a long time to come. But let's just put this into perspective:

No Social Fund assistance would be granted for the items the OP has asked about (clothing and flowers) though she may be offered a Community Care Grant to travel to the funeral if she has no way of getting there. People have not only answered her question in stating she would not get help from the Social Fund (fact), they have also offered suggestions on how to buy flowers within her budget, how to make a wreath within her budget, and places to look for clothing within her budget.

Her question was answered factually with some helpful suggestions thrown in about how she can get these items cheaply.

I don't think anyone has been judgemental. I do think the OP did not get the answer she wanted. Would it have been better to ignore her question, or give an incorrect answer, knowing she would not qualify? Of course not, that would be utterly cruel.

Whilst the OP is grieving right now, she has no idea of the personal turmoil others on this board could also be experiencing right now, accuses people of behaving in a condeming manner when they have not, yet seems fit to condenm others herself. It works both ways.

OP I am deeply sorry to hear that you have lost your dad and at this moment your time can be better spent than reading into things on these boards, that aren't there and tying yourself up in knots about it. You can get these items very cheaply although now that I am aware you are due o go bankrupt, I do not know if you even have a spare couple of quid for a cheap bouquet. Although I did not know your father, I would think that he would be proud of you and very grateful too that you are trying to get some lovely flowers and dress smartly for your final goodbye to him. Whether you manage to get the items or not, you have tried and that is ultimately what matters, and if there is such a thing as being able to look down on you, your dad would see that you are trying. And you don't have to stop trying now. Once your BR is over, fresh slate, wipe it clean - and keep going. Make YOURSELF proud.

Good post there, asknanswer :T

DX2

dmg24 wrote: »

Are you an advocate of fraud donnajunkie? :rolleyes:

Let's be honest here it's not the first time donnajunkie has advocated such a thing

AsknAnswer

The amount you get depends on the threshold available (which is dependent on your circumstances) and is reduced by any current social fund debt. It has nothing to do with being offered less than you asked for, and no matter how much you request, you will only get offered the amount that ties in with the above.

In some rare circumstances, a person will be offered more than they have asked for if it is within the applicable threshold and if the decision maker feels that the requested amount is too little to meet the need.