Im a new parent that needs help!

djdymond

Hello i have a few problems and i know its not exactly money saving problems but everyone is so nice on here, i thought someone would be able to suggest something

my son oliver is just over 8 weeks old and is bottle fed and has been from the beginning....

he will cry alot of the time and i tend to try everything and nothing seems to work.. i have bought him formula for easier digestion which has helped colic, but hes not taking full bottles. he should be on 180mls a feed, but takes 30ml then stops then an hour later has the same again then stops etc etc. weve tried waking him up for the rest but he either a. doesnt wake up b. chokes and gasps for air c. turns away or d. sometimes cries.. problem is, half an hour could pass and he cries again!! i obvviously check his nappy, temperatue and everything else.

i can sort of tell now when he is tired, he does all that jerky movements with his legs, moving his head side to side, rubbing eyes. but again will cry and its hard to put him down. once hes in full slep hes ok, but its getting him there. ive tried following the baby whisperers suggestions and sitting still with him swaddled and patting him. this worked the first time in literally mins. now his screaming gets worse until you give him the rest of the feed he didnt want half an hour previous, he will look like hes drinking, full asleep and then you notice hes not taken any at all!

he does have dummies but theyre hit and miss. when you know hes tired, it wont stay in his mouth, or he pulls a face as if to say, this isnt a teat to a bottle, i dont want this!

once hes asleep (which is around ten, i dont understand how mums can feed, bath and put baby to sleep at 7pm etc??) he will sleep till between 2am and 4am. this is the only time he will take a whole bottle, obviously because hes gone so long without one and putting him back down to go to sleep isnt usually a problem. he then wakes at 7amish, again that feed is ok, its all the rest that hardly make 100mls

weve had lots of problems. first we thought the teats to the bottles werent open enough so it wasnt going down.. then he looks like hes choking because hes taking too much. then we thought maybe the formula isnt filling enough and moved on to hungrier baby formula. this then gave him colic. so weve moved to easy digestion formula which helps but im adding gripe water to his feeds to help with his wind (he doesnt seem to have any without it) But i think im adding it to too many bottles because it does say on the bottle it will make baby irritable if given too often! SIGH!!!

i dont know what to do, both me and hubby are becoming quite tired with it all, as he just seems to whinge all the time and because he seems to be snacking instead of taking full feeds, we feel we have a constant bottle on tap and trying to feed him all the time!!

if no one can think of anything, any suggestions on forums that could help would be great!

if youve read this far into my post than many thanks to you!! xxx

jackie_w

Hello there,

My oldest boy was like this, and when I spoke to my health visitor she just told me that it would soon pass and become easier. This is easy for someone else to say to you, so Im sorry I dont have any better answers for you.

Have you spoken to your health visitor about it?

I hope everything settles down for you soon. It will become easier I and I kknow you probably dont think that, but it will I promise.


Jackie xx

bank_of_slate

Hi, our son would cry non stop every night for about 2 hours when he was a baby :eek: Didn't matter what we tried, I'm pretty sure it was colic.
He grew out of it, baby massage on his tummy used to help to work the wind through
...Linda xx

bank_of_slate

We used to find it exhausting when Elliot would cry and I felt useless as a Mum because I couldn't seem to do anything to help it.
As long as his nappies are ok, wet but not very strong smelling and he's gaining weight it's probably just a stage he's going through
...Linda xx

busiscoming2

djdymond wrote: »

this then gave him colic. so weve moved to easy digestion formula which helps but im adding gripe water to his feeds to help with his wind (he doesnt seem to have any without it) But i think im adding it to too many bottles because it does say on the bottle it will make baby irritable if given too often! SIGH!!!

Are you supposed to add it to the bottle? I used to give it to mine on a teaspoon or in a little cooled boiled water from another bottle.

lynnexxxo

I have always found netmums good, if you are looking for a parenting forum.

Why don't you try making up smaller feeds and feeding him more often? Babies tummies are small, maybe he is just not ready to take that much yet? I always find that if my twins take a full bottle you have to handle them with care, one to many shoogles and pop, out it comes

He will grow out of it, promise!!

djdymond

busiscoming2 wrote: »

Are you supposed to add it to the bottle? I used to give it to mine on a teaspoon or in a little cooled boiled water from another bottle.

thanks but yes ive read on a few different colic drops and gripe water boxes that it can be added to feeds. i did try with a spoon the first time and it was a bit of a nightmare, what with him moving about and crying!!! x

Money_maker

No advice but hugs.

Know how hard it can be at this age. You will only hear of the mums who can put baby to sleep at 7pm - you don't hear of the 98% of mums who are still trying to get LO off to sleep at 11pm!

It does get easier, honestly, even though the first few months take forever and you lose track of day and night. My LO hated lying down so the first few months I was either continually feeding or walking around with her. It was hard but I sort of miss it now (sort of!).

WASHER

You could be describing my son in your post, hes now 10. There is nothing you can do, if nappy ok and hes gaining weight, its perfectly normal for babies to take wee feeds and to cry for long periods (that's what my HV told me, it didn't help me either), honestly he will grow out of it, take it in turns with your husband, and remember the housework can wait, when hes sleeping you sleep and switch that mobile and the phone off. Your wellbeing is important, babies can be very demanding and very tiring.

I wish you a good nights sleep.

WASHER.x.

P.s. I've just read the post above and remember that I bought a sling to carry my son around cause he also didn't like laying flat. You forget these bits and only remember the nice bits.

sassygirl_2

My little boy was just the same, he would be constantly on the bottle with short time between them. He would be having around 12 bottles per day!!!
I hate to say this but he was the same up until he was about 7 months old (he's now 1yr old)
We just kind of got used to doing it to be honest Even now at 1 yr old he still has about 5 bottles per day of 6oz, and he constantly whinges LOL

I know its easy for people to say and it doesnt seem like it when your in the situation, but it will get better!
I think your very lucky that he sleeps at night! My son was awake all night til 5am for the first 4 weeks of his life!

Hope it gets better very quickly for you hun xx

JBD

Hi OP, my babies were mainly bottle fed. It sounds as if you are on the right lines as he does sleep a little at night. Here are a few suggestions which I tried.
Have you tried the wider teats for older babies. It sounds as if he is not getting milk fast enough and so getting frustated.
Sometimes it is worth trying a different brand. All my babies preferred a certain brand of formula[don't know if I am allowed to say which one.]
It can be worth feeding him before he starts to get upset as he might be crying too much to suck properly.

Are you winding him during the feed? It might help to sit him up every couple of minutes and gently rub his tummy or back.

Also experiment with different positions, eg my sister used to lay one of her babies on his back away from her otherwise he would just fall asleep all the time. Just little things like tickling their feet can help them stay awake for longer.

Your baby may also be thirsty, have you tried giving him a little boiled water?