Pro and Cons for marriage/living together

krashovr10ad

++

I have just moved in with my girlfriend & from a financial point of view it was a no brainer! Working 16 hours and with a child - as a single mum she was financially much better off living alone. She got nearly as much as I did for a 40 hour week!!

Now I have moved in, we have lost all the benefits & I am getting hammered by the CSA for my own child...

Don't have children or if you do split up & live alone seens to be this governments message! No wonder society is going to hell in a handcart...

Sorry - Gripe over...

++

donna-j_2

Dead_Eye_Jones wrote:

I think you should go for it, tie the knot. tbh marriage exists to celebrate the union of two people, thats the whole point of it. If you are living as a couple in a (theoreticaly) permenant manner then I think it is almost your duty to get married, its how the society that you are a member of operates.

Not doing it as a protest against the instituation just seems childish to me. Its almost like a 'im better than society' so im not going to do it reaction - 'two fingers to the rules'. 'Boo Hoo society says we should do this so im not going to' - reminds me of a teenage who hasnt got their way - time to grow up imo. Why not have the courage to embrace marriage (assuming you are in the relationship for keeps of course).

Getting married for money is as weak as not getting married to make a point against society.

GL.

I really shouldn't rise to this, but have you actually read the thread? Whoever said they were better than society? I just can't be bothered ...

gingercordial

dinkydee wrote:

Why not just get wills made leaving things you want to to each other? this could apply to pensions issue perhaps. I think this is what gay and lesbian couples have to do and its only fair especially if you are living a long time with a partner.

Unfortunately wills do not help with the next-of-kin issue, and it does leave you open to inheritance tax (which is zero for married couples) for example if you have a large house.

Gay and lesbian couples fought to have civil partnerships introduced precisely because they did not have the rights that straight couples had in terms of the ability to get married and take advantage of these benefits. Now, thankfully, they do not have to rely on wills alone.

trythat

I've lived with my partner for 21 years and we have a 12 year old Son. I used to think getting married was the 'thing' to do, but I've seen more divorces than split-ups. For some people, the bit of paper seems to change their outlook on life. So for the time being we'll be living to gether.

What we have done is any insurances etc that we have taken out are either in joint names, or we name the other as the benifactor. We have just done another set of wills, so we are both covered and our son is also looked after.

Regarding next of kin when you are maybe ill, say in a coma, we have just taken out 'power of attorney' forms about 60 quid for both of us, this means that we can name whoever we want to act on our behalf if we are incopacitaed, this seemed to us a good way of getting around the next of kin thing.