The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 5

mookiepook

Thanks PBT for a great post - and what a good idea about having a contingency plan, thanks Lurkio. As usual GC hit the nail on the head - what you said about changing your goals to suit your drinking is so true for me. The more I think about my drinking though, I realise that I just don't need to drink any more to enjoy myself, it doesn't make you enjoy a night out more. I recently read Allen Carr's "No More Hangovers" book and loved it. I highly recommend it - he helped me give up smoking too.

Bismarck

Well DB.

Well done for not trying to drive. I'm sure there must have been a part of you that thought of it.

Please look at it as a chance to make it better for if there was a next time. Nothing happened that cannot be undone. Please view that as a blessing...or a free warning.

Next time you are tempted to drink enough to make you unable to drive, remember how you felt tonight. Then make a choice about whether it was worth it. And ensure that your son knows the impact of his actions too...on everyone.

take care and be at peace.

Pippilongstocking

Lurkio wrote: »

DB - Life is full of "What ifs". Don't beat yourself up too much. It may be worth working out a contingency plan with your DS for such occasions (there are many reasons it may happen, not just because you've had a drink). It may help ease your anxiety.


I have all this to come in a couple of years.......

This is so true - and I'm the same with both the what if's and the children getting to be 'that' age soon.

I think a contingency plan is a good idea - morning all - nicely showered and needing a cuppa now.

jo1972

Afternoon all,

I'm doing a 'Budgie-stylee' post this morning as although I've been posting on here and reading for the last couple of weeks, I've not been able to post properly due to posting on phone which is a total faff. Had a read back of my posts and it's all about me, me, me, so now I'm going to talk about you, you, you

Lets begin.......

HB, I hope you are feeling better now and the bear-flu has left the towers? Hope you are having a great weekend xx

Saorsie, congrats on the AF number you've notched up and achieving your target :T:T, how are you feeling, hopefully feeling detoxed?

115k, your one of "those people" in the bank comment reminded me of my fav Young Ones episode "Summer Holiday" when they go to rob a bank and the bloke in front is the guy from the penny arcade across the road! (8 minutes in )

Lurks, you are doing amazingly well this month, well done Isn't it the mods that have to start new threads *confuzzed* I think it's time for a new one, should I PM the mods? What does everyone think? Maybe a nice new shiney thread would be theraputic (sp?) and a nice new start?

Shoppy, please keep posting even if you do drink, this is a cutting down thread too xx

Marru, everything crossed for your job applications hunny xx

Budgie, you are doing so well this month, I hope you notice what a difference being AF makes Thank you for the lovely poem :A

PIR, I hope that getting a full time job isn't getting you down, I know what you mean about being busy, it's hard sometimes to find time for yourself. I think I will start list writing so I can manage my time better. xx

Fay, what the hell is body balance, it's sounds painful, why would you want to do that to yourself?? I think you would be a perfect scorer for Feb, keeps your mind on the goal Good luck with your chopping, cooking, weighing etc... Don't worry bout the text, I was sleeping and phone ALWAYS on silent cos I refuse to be disturbed when sleeping lol, didn't see it till I got up. Good luck phoning/visiting/emailing alcohol place, lemme know how it goes xx

Netttie, thanks for the cleaning poem, I think quite a few of us can relate

Hollie, I am so glad that this thread is doing you some good, you have notched up an impressive amount of AF days this month, well done So sorry to hear the sad news about your child's friend's mum

Shaggy, thanks for the pics everyday, well done for a fabulous Jan AF score and hitting your target!! :T:T

Caz, I hope your sniffles and coldsore didn't turn into a full blown cold/flu. Hope you are doing okay? Might need a bit more advice from you on essential oils when you've got time xx

GP, totally impressive lard loss :T:T I hope you are starting to feel the benefits of being AF, please pop in and tell us xxx

Miss P, sorry to hear you've been unwell and the car and washing machine problems. My washing machine broke ages ago and because of its age will cost more to fix than the thing is worth and unfortunately we don't have the money to buy a new one. I've been having to go to the launderette every week which is a pain, but I get a great feeling when load all my clean washed and folded clothes into the car cos I know I don't have to do any washing for a week. Plus my mum looks after the kids so I get 2 hours peace too :rotfl: xx

Lincs, congrats on a great AF total this month :T:T

Mr Fox, welcome to the thread :wave: I hope that chatting to us will give you the support you need to address your drinking. Please pop back on and let us know how you are

Im.Not.Quite.Sure, welcome to you as well, please have a read back of some of the thread, most of us know how you are feeling. Stick around and get some support and advice, good luck

Marru, well done on the running, you strange strange person *confused and rolleyes*, how was the sofa xx

Mookie, congrats for the great AF total you've notched up so far :T:T

Gien, glad you are back and able to post freely, good luck on getting back on track

Squizz, congrats on your 7 day AF achievement :T:T

GG, so glad to see you back posting, missed ya girl xx

MP, 'The Woman that Walked into Doors' is one of my favourite books, very sad though how's you?

WB, I am an all or nothing person, I do everything to excess and when I want to do whatever it is, I have to do it NOW!!! I think quite a few of us suffer from this *confuzzed and rollseyes*. Hope you're okay? xx

Sparkles, you sound like you're in a good place at the moment xxx

HS, wow, just clocked your target and score so far, great news, well done :T:T

WBF, you are doing great this month, well done :T:T

Maman, thanks for the pervy hug, could always do with one of those

PBT, thanks again :A

DB, my heart goes out to you. Particularly because I was in a very similar situation a few months ago when my DD1 was attacked by her ex-boyfriend when he tried to pull her out of her boyfriend's car and then smashed the car with a crow bar, I had been drinking heavily that night and was so upset with myself that I had let myself and her down, I've done this a few times in fact. Please use this as a learning curve, remember it if you ever want to drink but know that you shouldn't drink. I hope your DS is okay xx

YM, hope you are lurking matey

BHB, where the hell are ya??

40SM, where the hell are ya??

Hello to everyone else.....GC, RA, Bis, Angie, PuzzCat, Mrs dee, IM, DC, Gromit, Mari, CW, Su, Heath, Eselt, Nessa, Dizzy, Clara, MrsJC, INTKTH, Kittie, Snowy, MO7, CA, suweb, JG, toby, Marthasdad, strops, FH, Sea.

Hello to all I've missed and apologies, hello to all the Lurkers :wave:

Phew......

jo1972

And now about me

I am unhungovered today, bluddy exhausted and still recovering from the alcohol haze for a few days I guess. I actually went to bed at 10.30pm and didn't wake up till 8.50am this morning, didn't even wake up during the night :T did have a vivid dream though, I can remember lots of roller coasters (which is a regular dream of mine, usually I'm stuck in one and can't get off), I also had a train that I couldn't find a seat in (another regular) and a restaurant with no tables free (another regular!). I also remember having no money for fags (not smoked for a couple of years now *confused*) and drink and tried every trick in the book to get booze. Can't remember the end of it now.

Anyway, I'm feeling extremely confident for a super sober Saturday (early in the day I know), but I still feel angry at being controlled at 37 years old, no one controls me :mad: .

I am still having problems in my mouth, I've been drinking solidly for a couple of weeks now, probably 5-6 cans of stella every night between 7-10pm, which is rather a lot in a short space of time. I'm hoping that this is what is making my gums sore. This has only been happening for a month or so but I think my body has finally used all it's resources to fight the alcohol consumption, it's not only my mind that's beaten but my body as well. I'm worried about the mouth as I always think the worst and insisted to my doc the other week I thought I had mouth cancer and he needed to look at it :undecided he told me I needed to see a dentist as his eye sight wasn't that good *confused*. I told him that he was a doctor and he needed to look at it!! He said I need to see a dentist, unfortunately I have no money till next Friday. So hopefully a weeks abstinence will clear it up completely and I won't have to go, please keep everything crossed for me

17 years of heavy drinking and 20+ years of heavy smoking has taken it's toll.

Anyway, you'll all be pleased to hear that I shall be on here all evening spouting out verbal diahorrea as OH is going out at 4pm and I need a distraction. Feel free to stick me on ignore (I know Lurks will ) :rotfl:)

xx

DecemberBaby_2

Jo -Wow! That's a mega post! And thanks - You've experienced similar and know how I feel.

Thank you all so much for the kind support and good advice.

Maman - I take your point and you are right that there are two separate issues here. My own and my son's and I won't mix the two. As you say, loads of people would have been in the same position. They wouldn't necessarily feel too bad about that but I do because I know it is part
of a bigger problem for me. Bismarck - you're right a part of me did want to drive but I knew that could have been disastrous.

I'll try to have a good talk to my son. He's woken up angry with his mates and not interested in talking to me at the moment. I think he was very scared to find himself alone last night. I have never seen him cry like that. It was the drink though. Being alone in the city centre isn't that
frightening. Our contingency plan has been that he could get a cab any time he needs to come home unexpectedly and I'll pay for it but he just wasn't capable of understanding where to go to get it. We never thought of that! I don't have any family around here to call on for help so it is just me really.

GC - Many thanks. I'm realising that alcoholism as an illness - not something we just choose to do because we're weak, greedy, selfish or for any other reason. I'll try to be kinder to myself. I often hate myself and I know I shouldn't. I think this forum is great, really helpful and full of lovely people but yes you are right. I need to get help elsewhere too. I have left a message with an alcohol counselling service and also thinking of going along to an AA meeting. I do need to take action as you say. Sitting thinking just adds to my anxiety.

Love to all and have a good day.
DB

40somethingmum

jo1972 wrote: »

Afternoon all,


40SM, where the hell are ya??
QUOTE]

I am here my dear :rotfl: Don't worry I am Ok but January is a manic month for us accountants:mad: I have been so busy I have not even had time to lurk:eek:.( even at work :eek:).;)

On that note, I will say ta ta for now as I am now off to work ( again)! No rest for the wicked.;)

Normal service will resume in February,:T:T

Much love to you all.

40SM:D

Lurkio

jo1972 wrote: »

Lurks, you are doing amazingly well this month, well done Isn't it the mods that have to start new threads *confuzzed* I think it's time for a new one, should I PM the mods? What does everyone think? Maybe a nice new shiney thread would be theraputic (sp?) and a nice new start?

Nope - mods would lock this one (which we can't), but you(!) can just start a new one and put a link to it in this thread

and thanks

jo1972

Lurkio wrote: »

you(!) can just start a new one

Me??? *confused* You can't then??? *confused* *rolls the old mince pies*

jo1972

Let's have a general consensus (sp?) about starting a new thread, do we want one now, or on 1st Feb or inbetween if mods force one?