Confused by teenage sons fibs...

TeetersOnHeels

Needed to get a mobile no. from my sons phone on Tuesday. Wasn't particularly snooping, he's a good lad and doesn't give me any major concerns, apart from telling the odd fib. Which is where the problem lies..The inbox on his phone comes up when you switch it on, and displays the first line of the text. The last one was from his G/F (who he's been seeing 16mths) saying "ask your mum when she gets in". The one before said "is she working 12hrs on Sat?"
I work alternate weekends and should've been working 12hrs tomorrow. My son, who's 15 knows when I'm on a long shift he needs to be around some of the time to give the dogs their tea-it comes round about 5 times a month. When I went into work on Wed there was scope to have the evening off, so I though if DS does want to go out for the day he'd be able to. When I got home I mentioned I'd got the evening off, and I asked if he'd got anything planned for the weekend - he said "no".
Today my nosiness got the better of me (and much as I know I deserve everything I get for looking..) but he's still telling her I'm at work all day tomorrow.
He's at her house from school today, I usually pick him up at 9pm & I'm a bit cheesed off he seems to be using me and my shifts (and occaisionally looking after our 2 dogs) as an excuse not to go out for the day with G/F and her family - on another text G/F had said her dad had said "what's his mum going to do when he leaves home, he won't be able to look after the dogs then"
I don't know wether to ask him about this, admitting I saw the texts, or just leave it, and let people think I won't let him go out for the day 'cos I'm at work!

zzzLazyDaisy

I'd leave it.

He doesn't want to spend the day with his gf's family for whatever reason, and probably doesn't know how to tell them without hurting gf's feelings. So he has told a white lie.

Haven't you ever made up a headache/appointment/whatever to get out of doing something?

IMO it isn't worth causing an argument and possibly causing a rift between you over the issue of trust and privacy.

mrcow

Leave it - it's up to him.

It's probably a convenient excuse to use - what do you care what they think?

And stop reading his phone!

valkirn

I'd leave it too as it could have been an innocent question, i mean honestly what are you going to do with the dogs say if he decided to go away to university or when he gets a job and happens to have to work on the same days you do???

My mum used to have an agreement with me that i was to go home on lunch and take our dog out and this worked fine while i was at home but then i had the oppertunity to move out and i couldnt get home in my lunch hour then as i lived and worked 30 miles away xx

TeetersOnHeels

Can see your point about saying I'm doing something else when I don't want to do something - but I've never used another person as my excuse. I think what really narks is that I've taking 4hrs leave thinking I was doing him a favour - suppose it serves me right for snooping!!

PasturesNew

Other people's parents are boring usually. Most boys would rather cut off their own leg than go out with a gf's parents.

He's lying .... it's easier to blame you than suffer the fall out of "I have spare time, I don't want to spend it with you and your family because that would be really boring. I feel trapped, you're trapping me. I am with you because I get to grope your boobs ... can't do that with your mum there. No thanks. Please, pass me that monkey wrench, let me show you how I'd rather pull out my own teeth than spend another dull day playing some warped form of happy familieis with your family as if we were already a married couple ... I am 15 !!!!!!, not 50"

TeetersOnHeels

One of the 2 dogs is 9, and needs to go out regularly, working shifts I can be off all morning, or from lunchtime. I come home at lunchtime and take them out, it's just the odd evening I'm at work til 9 - and to be honest by the time DS leaves home, with the best will in the world I don't think the elder dog will be with us - so it won't be a problem.
I'll be picking DS up from G/F at 9 tonight, usually get invited in by her mum, and hope it doesn't come up in conversation - "it's a pity DS can't come out with us for the day tomorrow, with you being at work..." when I know full well he could go if he wanted to!

TeetersOnHeels

PasturesNew that really had me smiling!:rotfl:

""He's lying .... it's easier to blame you than suffer the fall out of "I have spare time, I don't want to spend it with you and your family because that would be really boring. I feel trapped, you're trapping me. I am with you because I get to grope your boobs ... can't do that with your mum there. No thanks. Please, pass me that monkey wrench, let me show you how I'd rather pull out my own teeth than spend another dull day playing some warped form of happy familieis with your family as if we were already a married couple ... I am 15 !!!!!!, not 50"

He did have a couple of days out with them over the holidays, maybe it has got a bit much!

valkirn

Oh i miss my teenage years lol x unfortunatly us parents get blamed for alot of things especially like pasturesnew has said above.. i used to use my parents to get out of alot of things xx

As for sat thats up to you what you do but i'd be a !!!!!! and drop him in it lol x

Money_maker

Teenage boys = lying in bed til late, playstation/xbox/wii, computer, chilling in front of tv, sleeping.

Maybe he wants a chillout day?
If girlfriends mum assumes you're working tomorrow, dont lie but dont bring it up if she doesn't!

Paparika

I'd keep out of it, teenage love lives are bad enough as it is with out mum nosing in, i tried to inquire to my DS and i got a wall of silence.

leave his phone alone..