How much to give a 17 year old?

PolishBigSpender

I'm honestly amazed that so many people here think that a child should be working alongside studying. It's just not the done thing in Poland - even the poorest parents (no bursaries/allowances/whatever for children!) here will do all they can to ensure that their child gets the best education that they can.

Certainly, expecting a child to work and pay 'board' while they're in school (and our school leavers finish at 19) would be seen as incredibly disgraceful. The parents duty is to support the child, not to insist that they work for a living while attempting to get the best grades that they can. I really don't think that working part time is conductive towards getting the best grades - and I'm not surprised that it's discouraged.

It's definitely hypocritical if the parents are receiving benefits for the child and yet aren't spending the money on the child.

boiler_man

Back in the dark ages when I was in the sixth form, I was given the family allowance, but had to buy my own clothes, makeup and smellies, pay for buses (if I decided not to walk or cycle) and buy food out if I did not take a packed lunch. I had driving lessons for my 18th birthday. I worked 4 hours on a Saturday to give me my "going out" money and took a summer holiday job (and worked lots of overtime there) to buy my first car and put it on the road.

If it would be difficult for your DD to get a weekend job, certainly some extra chores around the house for money would not do any harm. The basic quick jobs should be to help out and not for money though. Why not work out what you spend on her clothes and give this as a basic allowance with top ups for extra help.

bestpud

oompahloompah wrote: »

Here in Scotland the amount you are allowed to earn has changed, so if your household income is less than around £20K you get NOTHING.

That doesn't apply to the person I aimed the reply at.

Plus, my point was it is not because both parents are working, as was implied.

As for Scotland - there is no HE fees so that's something, eh!

System

I see nothing wrong with working part time whilst studying. EMA didn't exist in my day and i managed just fine. I had £5 a week pocket money and the rest i earnt working 10 hours a week.

Besides it prepares you for when you go to uni where the vast majority of students HAVE to work part time if they want to afford to live!

Savvy_Sue

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

I'm honestly amazed that so many people here think that a child should be working alongside studying. It's just not the done thing in Poland - even the poorest parents (no bursaries/allowances/whatever for children!) here will do all they can to ensure that their child gets the best education that they can.

Yes, but in case you haven't noticed, most of us are in the UK, where it is perfectly normal for children to get paper rounds for an hour or two a week from the age of 13, and to work up from there. And you really can't tell me that the average teenager can't spare a couple of hours a week from studying / facebook / MSN / hanging out with friends in order to do a paper round.

My concern now DS3 has started working Saturdays at the local cinema is not that he won't get his school work done, but that he won't be able to play in cricket matches regularly! I don't know if he's worked that out yet: he's not long started and the season was over. If he has thought about it, he's probably assuming that he'll be able to charm his way into different shifts so that he IS free on Saturdays! :rotfl:

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

Certainly, expecting a child to work and pay 'board' while they're in school (and our school leavers finish at 19) would be seen as incredibly disgraceful.

And that is, I would say, unusual for the UK, and not many families do that, and the OP is certainly not suggesting that she would do that.

Mine have never been able to claim EMA, but I will say that if they had been able to, and the family budget had been as tight as it sometimes has in the past, I would certainly consider asking for a small weekly contribution if they were left with more 'pocket money' than they needed - if they were getting £30 per week but not having to pay for transport, then that's a lot of 'free' money IMO. The bus fares for mine are now £14 per week, as it happens, so that wouldn't leave much 'free' money!

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

I really don't think that working part time is conductive towards getting the best grades - and I'm not surprised that it's discouraged.

Depends on the child: some of them work better if they don't have too much free time in which to not get on with it!

Navvie

Paper round and part time job is what I had when I was 17 and at college. I rode my push bike to college, which was 8 miles away. I got no handouts from my parents and not state support (other than child support which mum used to feed and clothe us).

The vast majority of children/young people these days have it far too easy. No idea of the value of money and no work-ethic.

I am not a OAP remembering the good old days. I am 28 years old and I was working my way through college in 1998. My parents supported me and did all they could for me all the time I was in compulsory education, when I chose to go to college they made me stand on my own two feet, and made me start supporting myself... I got it wrong a lot of the time and my wages were spent the day after I was paid, but I soon learned.

We need to let our children stand on their own two feet. They have no financial commitments at that age, and they can always come home at the end of the day if they do make a mistake with whatever money they are earning. We can only hope that they will learn from the mistakes and not make them again.

(Obviously all IMHO, feel free to ignore if you disagree)

the_rottweiler

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

I'm honestly amazed that so many people here think that a child should be working alongside studying. It's just not the done thing in Poland - even the poorest parents (no bursaries/allowances/whatever for children!) here will do all they can to ensure that their child gets the best education that they can.

Certainly, expecting a child to work and pay 'board' while they're in school (and our school leavers finish at 19) would be seen as incredibly disgraceful. The parents duty is to support the child, not to insist that they work for a living while attempting to get the best grades that they can. I really don't think that working part time is conductive towards getting the best grades - and I'm not surprised that it's discouraged.

It's definitely hypocritical if the parents are receiving benefits for the child and yet aren't spending the money on the child.

I also do all I can to help my children get the best education I can (in fact ds2 has taken 4 gcses a year early and got top grades in 3 of them, maths result still missing)

I do not expect ds1 to pay board, but he wants to pay his own way, and if he is using his money for his clothers, entertainment, guitar strings etc
then I wont stop him.

Yes I recieve child benefit and tax credits for him, But I also provide copious amounts of food, heat the water for his 2 showers a day, and pay for all the electricity he uses playing his guitars, cds, charging ipods, and phones

I will not charge him board until he leaves full time education and starts in a full time job, which if he goes to uni, could be another 5 or 6 years

Prudent

boopydoo wrote: »

I think we should get back to the question the OP asked and stop the debate on EMA. Start another thread if you want but don't hijack this one!

I think your idea about giving money in exchange for housework is a better one. You could also speak to her dad and see if he can't make arrangements with you to pay a certain amount to you DD as well.

I know you say that she had mild learning difficulties but a job would help her confidence so much. My friend had a son with quite bad learning difficulties and he started working and has become so much more confident and outgoing and less frustrated. He works in a supermarket but I know Starbucks have a great record for helping those with learning difficulties and they are very patient with their staff. Could be worth inquiring

Some really good advice - I will follow this through thank you

Prudent

oompahloompah wrote: »

Here in Scotland the amount you are allowed to earn has changed, so if your household income is less than around £20K you get NOTHING.

Yes I found that out as I live in Scotland.

Prudent

Thank you everyone for some really helpful responses