Maiden name dilemma

dogcat_2

I'm all of a muddle as well....when I got divorced...I was angry and changed my name..on my passport to my maiden name...although everything else is still in my married name. I have a new partner and child....at the school I am known as his name...although on paper with them I am still using my married name...(is everyone still with me)?...I should have changed everything over back to my maiden name...but was just too much hassle...It's been 14 years since I divorced.:eek::cool:

Jo_R_2

Well I thought I could contribute something useful to this conversation LOL...

Ahem well maybe not as me and OH still disagree over what we're going to do with our names... Baby has both our surnames, as in 'first name, middle name, my surname, his surname' (no hypens, but two surnames). DDs from my previous relationship have similar but with their dad's surname last. So you'd think it would make sense that he might think taking my surname as well would mean we all had a common bond but noooooo - bloody male pride strikes, it's only his name or nothing:rolleyes:

Seems stupid - I'd be quite willing to consider being 'Jo [my surname] [his surname]' but he won't do the same in reverse.

I have found with DDs that people often pick up on only one surname because their surnames aren't hyphenated, and in fact they're more often called by just my surname when people see I'm their mum and what my surname is (if that makes sense.) Then others (less often it has to be said) seem to think that MY surname is a middle name and so miss that out completely

Don't know if that's any help but have you thought any more about it?

iamana1ias

Jo_R wrote: »

I have found with DDs that people often pick up on only one surname because their surnames aren't hyphenated, and in fact they're more often called by just my surname when people see I'm their mum and what my surname is (if that makes sense.) Then others (less often it has to be said) seem to think that MY surname is a middle name and so miss that out completely

traditionally the surname is the last name. Why would you expect people to think that a name between the first and last names is anything other than a middle name? If my name was Sarah Louise Jones you wouldn't think for one second that Louise was some kind of extra surname would you? You'd assume that Louise was my middle name. If you hyphenate it with the first name it becomes a first name and if you hyphenate it with the other surname it becomes a surname. Simples

frannyann

dogcat wrote: »

I'm all of a muddle as well....when I got divorced...I was angry and changed my name..on my passport to my maiden name...although everything else is still in my married name. I have a new partner and child....at the school I am known as his name...although on paper with them I am still using my married name...(is everyone still with me)?...I should have changed everything over back to my maiden name...but was just too much hassle...It's been 14 years since I divorced.:eek::cool:

Yep makes perfect sense to me, as did similar!! So DD and I have (ex) hubs last name, and now I am getting married, obviously don't want to keep (ex) hubs name as (new) hub may be a little concerned at attachment to ex's name However don't want to have different name from DD, as Mr and Mrs X and junior Y sounds odd, however DD solved the problem as she has chosen to use both our surnames in day to day life!

Jo_R_2

iamana1ias wrote: »

traditionally the surname is the last name. Why would you expect people to think that a name between the first and last names is anything other than a middle name? If my name was Sarah Louise Jones you wouldn't think for one second that Louise was some kind of extra surname would you? You'd assume that Louise was my middle name. If you hyphenate it with the first name it becomes a first name and if you hyphenate it with the other surname it becomes a surname. Simples

I get what you are saying but doesn't really explain why people call DDs by their first name and my surname, leaving out their dad's name from the end - I could understand it if my surname was anything like a first name but it isn't - and I'd wonder why the doctor/dentist/etc thought it was cute to call either of them into their appointment by announcing their first name and middle name...?!

Anyhow shellsuit - any more thoughts?

shellsuit

Jo_R wrote: »

I get what you are saying but doesn't really explain why people call DDs by their first name and my surname, leaving out their dad's name from the end - I could understand it if my surname was anything like a first name but it isn't - and I'd wonder why the doctor/dentist/etc thought it was cute to call either of them into their appointment by announcing their first name and middle name...?!

Anyhow shellsuit - any more thoughts?

Hiya Jo, Upto now I'll be having my maiden name as my middle name, but that may change over time lol

System

I couldn't do that with my maiden name (well its still my surname..but anyway)

reason:: its a blokes name