Maiden name dilemma

shellsuit

I don't have a middle name and I'm an only child, so I was thinking of keeping my maiden name and having it as my middle name.

Has anybody else done this? To do it, you have to change it by deed poll once married, which doesn't bother me at all.

Don't think I can be bothered with a double barrelled name as it's too much hassle explaining/correcting it to people/companies on the phone etc...

I have 2 children to my ex partner and me and OH have a son together.

The 2 eldest (13 and 11) have my surname (always have done) and the baby has Daddy's name.

I really want to have my maiden name in there somewhere so that I have the same name as all 3 children (if that makes sense?)

What have other people done who have been/are in my situation??

I've had my name for 33 years (be 34 years by the time we get married)and I don't want to get rid of it all together.

whitewing

Sounds like a good idea to me.

My DS now has a different surname to me, DH and baby-to-be. We asked if he wanted to change his name but he is ok to keep it. My maiden name was not his surname. Does seem a little odd since I got married, but doesn't bother DS in the least.

ncv2

I know a lot of women that change their middle to their maiden name when they get married.

I haven't decided what I will do yet.

Oldernotwiser

Why not just hang on to your maiden name; it's only a convention to take your husband's name on marriage.

Rosie75

Shellsuit - I'm 34 and can't imagine changing the name I've had for so long either (getting married in December). It would also be quite complicated professionally for me to change my name, so I'm keeping my maiden name. I'm not sure what I'd do if we had children, though - I think perhaps then I would change my name to my husband's but keep my maiden name in professional life. Or there's always the option of him changing his name to mine!

shellsuit

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

Why not just hang on to your maiden name; it's only a convention to take your husband's name on marriage.

I do want to hang onto my maiden name ~ but I also want to take my fiance's name.

Like I've just explained, I want to have the same names as the children.

Rosie75

As there's three of you with your name and two with his, why not suggest to your fiancee that it would be easier all round if he and your son took your name?

ZiggyStardust_2

I double barrelled mine as didn't want to give up my name all together! Hubby changed his as well so we have the same surname and our children will (which was lovely- I know alot of men wouldn't!) Doesn't cause me any problems- also sounds nice Think a few women keep their maiden name as a middle name too. I knew a woman at work who did, her reason being that she didn't have any brothers and wanted to continue her father's name somehow. Lovely idea!

shellsuit

Rosie75 wrote: »

As there's three of you with your name and two with his, why not suggest to your fiancee that it would be easier all round if he and your son took your name?

I want to take his name and I don't want to have to faff about changing the babies name.

shellsuit

ZiggyStardust wrote: »

I double barrelled mine as didn't want to give up my name all together! Hubby changed his as well so we have the same surname and our children will (which was lovely- I know alot of men wouldn't!) Doesn't cause me any problems- also sounds nice Think a few women keep their maiden name as a middle name too. I knew a woman at work who did, her reason being that she didn't have any brothers and wanted to continue her father's name somehow. Lovely idea!

I don't have brothers, or sisters! That's another reason why i want to keep my name somewhere.


Do you have problems with your double barrelled name??

Say you were smith and hubby is jones, so you are now smith-jones....do you get people calling you mrs jones, and completely ignoring the smith- ??

ZiggyStardust_2

Whenever I speak to anyone from a company e.g. bank etc, or for example at the doctors surgery it's always my full surname, it never gets shortened. We have a hyphen and it's hubby's name than mine, just sounded better that way!

I loved my maiden name (was actually my mum's surname not my father's) and it made it so much easier for me- I saw it as adding a name rather than changing it! I would have felt like I was losing abit of my identity (silly, I know!) but I wanted to recognise hubby's name as well so this was the best thing for us, and like the idea we have started a new name and branch on the family tree (providing we have a boy or like minded girl of course )