Red Hair

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Following a chat with Grammar Girl and laughing at Mock the Week, I started thinking about my DD1. She has vibrant, bright, luminous, day glo true Titian hair - the nearest description would be the orange of a log fire, with the gold of the flames flickering through the waves cascading down to her lower back. She has the eyes of a cat - pale green - and alabaster white skin speckled with golden freckles. She also has long legs and is very slender, but curved with a tiny waist.

Now obviously, she would try and melt into the earth if she were to hear me describe her like this, but I have never seen anyone even remotely look like her, not even other redheads. She is, quite simply, stunning.

Now, in reality, the vast majority of people just stare at her like she's an exhibit at a travelling show. Most boys and men burble when she speaks to them and the ones that don't are usually a bit creepy - but the giant blonde boyfriend tends to stop them following her. She gets builders hanging off of scaffolding - in silence - and white van men forgetting to look where they are going in their vehicles (but again, not saying anything).

What bothers me are some of the women. The older ones are much nicer to her, even if they do usually ask her if her hair is real, but the middle aged and younger ones are so nasty to her.

She has had a job interview where the bleached brass besom interviewing her has declared 'Of course, if we were to offer you a position at the store, you would have to revert to your natural hair colour, as company policy only allows genetically feasible shades of hair'. When DD1 said that it was natural, the woman sniffed 'I see' and made notes in her pad. Three blonde girls from the group interview were employed. She is still to get a part time job.

Younger women are the worst (and, much as I hate to say it, it's blonde girls practically every time). They tend to mutter about dirty gingers and stuff like that, rather than shout abuse - I have exceptionally good hearing - and the stuff I have heard behind her back has, at times, has actually got to the 'Bet if we were to get her and burn it all off, she wouldn't be so smug' - they ran off when I let them know that I had heard them.

What on earth is wrong with them? And why is it OK to be abusive to my DD because her hair is a different colour? And why is it OK for the Sun and other newspapers to do it?
:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:

Teerah

I would assume it is purely jealousy Jojo

HairY

For the Love of God or everything and anything you consider holy and sacred, never ever ever ever let her dye it.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

HairY wrote: »

For the Love of God or everything and anything you consider holy and sacred, never ever ever ever let her dye it.

I asked her to promise me that, as she has flirted with the idea of jet black :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: just so she doesn't stand out for a day, to talk to me and I will buy her an expensive synthetic wig if she feels that strongly about it.

But even then, I suspect she'd just look more like Dita Von Teese and she'd still get open mouthed men everywhere she goes. (sigh)

Kaz2904

It's jealousy pure and simple. Most younger people would love to have that colour hair but just don't want to admit it. Older women don't care any more and are happy to admit that they would love that sort of hair.
Why don't you get your DD to google the most bought hair colourant (do it yourself first to make sure it's not bottle blonde though!).
Lordy, I would love hair like that, let alone the rest of her attributes!
Does she know the song Jolene by Dolly? (Love that song!).

donnac2558

But the song Jolene is about a titan haired mistress stealing a woman's husband. Not a good example.

Bitsy_Beans

Jealousy.
My mate wasn't beaten with the ugly stick (although she's not stunning she just has the long hair, nice figure and flirty personality ) and at a hen do for pole dancing lessons she was offered a job there. needless to say all the other women were vile to her and bitter about the fact that she was the one who looked best in hot pants.
its a shame we women can't be nicer to one another. Your DD is blessed to have such striking looks but sadly it brings out the green eyed monster in others.

GrammarGirl

I feel very strongly about this issue. I'm a blonde myself (naturally) but my OH has red hair and the abuse he had throughout school and into his adult life is disgusting and leaves me feeling desolate about the state of our country. It is disgraceful that people with red hair can be so openly and acceptably abused. What would happen if a comedian or newspaper made flippant, rude and hurtful comments about a black person? Utter outrage, is what would happen. But somehow it has become perfectly ok to make these comments about people with a certain hair colour? It makes my blood boil!!

Many people think it's 'just harmless teasing' but it goes way, way beyond that. People are beaten for having red hair, I've heard of someone pouring bleach over heads, pulling out hair in clumps, threatening and using disgusting language towards redheads. How is this right?!

Jojo, your daughter sounds absolutely stunning and goodness knows I would love her hair! I think a lot of it is jealousy but it's also because people are afraid to stand out. 'Ginger-bashing' has become so acceptable that people are scared to say 'actually, I really like that hair colour and think he/she is gorgeous'. They follow the crowd like sheep, desperate not to make a wrong move and be 'outed' as an individual.

I bet she finds as she grows older, people flock to her because she's unique. When we leave the terrible teenage years behind, we start realising that being different is good, and people strive to stand out! My OH didn't get any hassle for his hair throughout uni, people loved it and he cultivated a massive afro! He still gets comments from stupid, narrowminded people but he's learn to rise above it and let it wash over him.

I really hope your daughter keeps her hair and realises how special she is to have it.

GrammarGirl

Oh and 'genetically feasible hair colours'?! What, like bleach blonde?!

funky_snow

Its purely jealousy and eventually most people grow out of it (but not all like that interviewer)
I have an unusual shade of ginger hair - (ginger covers such a wide range of gold through to deep red) and it took me years to embrace it as a teenager. Am so glad my mum wouldn't let me dye it. As a kid/teenager it gave me so much grief but I'm not even sure when that changed - and now as an adult I seem to get compliments more often than horrible comments. Chatting in 2 different hairdressers they said they would refuse to put colour in my hair if I did want to change it! (Very MSE!)

Unfortunately you just have to deal with the nasty comments and not take them to heart. You soon realise how shallow those idiots are...

lostinrates

I just don't understand why the knee jerk hatred of red hair. At its ''worst'' it can be washed out, no more vibrant than the average mousey colour, at its best its the most beautiful, beautiful colour. Dark red runs strongly in my family and honestly, I'm sad I didn't get it.

The one thing I will say is that, understandably, red heads can be a little defensive some times. I've never forgotton a schoolmate having her hair cut and my (very clumsy) comment that if I had her hair I couldn't stand to cut it (meaning I'd have loved her waist length ginger) and having her burst into tears about it being ''people like me'' that made her cut it, and feel like a freak and all her friends were accusing me of trying to bully her. All because of a clumsily phrased atempt and complimenting hair I thought was the most beautiful in our school!

I'm blonde w/highlights but have ''that'' colouring which would take red well, and would do it if only the dyes were better: you just can't recreate that amaing dark red colour!