The grand plan for Catzpaws ... can it be done?

yellowmonkey

Just thought I would pop in and say Hi :hello:

You have allowed some slack for yourself just try not to indulge too much if you go to the Pub.

Remember the eyes are always watching

Take care

Catzpaws

Resistance WAS futile it seems. I did end up going to the pub. But, rather than the bottle of wine that I’d have usually (and end up feeling a bit ropey today), I stuck to one large glass of rose. And, you know what? That was actually fine. Spend = £8. On the positive note, since cutting down on alcohol, my skin has been feeling SO much better!
Spend-wise, I also had to buy a car seat cover - £15 from ebay. A real must as my dog is in my car daily practically and the car seat needs to be protected from doggy smells/hairs if I’m going to sell it for market value next year (if pregnant by then, that is).
Also, did a shop in Aldi/Sainsburys, which should hopefully see us through to mid-week - £20. Unless, of course, OH decides he needs more sweets, booze, or biscuits……..
Anyway, I realised when I was driving home last night that I would have been over 4 months pregnant by now - if I hadn’t lost mine in June. It made me feel incredibly sad and I had a little blub to myself in the car. It’s even harder as well at the moment as one close friend had a little boy last week. Another friend, whose wedding I attended shortly after the ectopic, has announced that she’s trying for a baby too. OH can’t really talk about any of this really as it’s ‘emotional stuff’, which he has always struggled to get his head around.
But, with it being the anniversary of 9/11 today, it’s a big reminder there’s other stuff going on in the world. Bigger stuff. So, I need to remember to not focus so inwardly, and remember that I have tons to be thankful for.
CP x

Lemon_Tree

sorry to hear about your lost baby, you are entitled to remember what happened and mourn the loss and don't you forget that! Do you have anyone other than OH who you can talk it over with?

Catzpaws

Hi Lemon Tree

Although I do have friends and family I can talk to this about, I must admit that I do find it quite difficult to say how I feel without feeling like I’m being over dramatic, putting a burden on them or making them feel awkward. Invariably (and without sounding unkind), people just don’t understand (and I wouldn’t expect them to unless they’ve been thru something similar) and they can end up saying the wrong the thing - which can end up making me feel even worse.

So, I end up putting a brave face on it and saying that I’m okay. And, TBH, for the most part I’m fine, but then I have these moments when I’m actually really devastated. It’s the hardest thing that I’ve had to deal with. I still feel crushed about the whole thing.

It does make me feel sad as I feel that OH has now moved on (in his mind). But, I realise that I can’t expect him to feel the same way that I do, and there’s no point trying to convince him otherwise.

But, I think I’m probably making it worse by not being honest with my feelings. I have a rare catch up with friends later so it might be good to talk about it then. But, TBH, it’s quite good to offload here too. Hope you don’t mind my virtual chewing of your ear!!!!

CP x

Catzpaws

On a slighly lighter note (yeah right!): debts.

Spent £20 going out last night. On way home, persuaded OH that another trip to Tesco for sweets was unnecessary.

Going for long run this morning (free!), then going bank to sort out joint account with OH. After that, I'm planning on catching up with friends. Planning on making it a cheap catch up so I'll see how I get on...

Oh new big spend alert: sofa. We managed to damage our sofa recently. Insurance people have sent a letter through about the claim - it's £200 excess. Arrgh!

honeybear_2

Hi Catz

Just catching up so big hugs to you
xx

Lemon_Tree

we have lots of ears between us that you can bend so no worries there. i was thinking of going to the bank today to get a new current account but i'm not sure which bank is less evil than the rest. Sounds like OH has finally gotten out of bed, so we can start on the rest of the day - i've done two loads of washing and put them outside, just been waiting for him to catch up on his sleep

Catzpaws

^^Thanks for the replies – it means a lot.^^ Spoke again to OH about this after another little cry yesterday morning. I told him how I was feeling and he told me that I need to keep talking to him so that he can understand things more.. I need to remember not to bottle things up, which is what I tend to do...

Catzpaws

Well, the trip to the bank turned out to be an utter waste of time. Although customer services HAD told me that I could complete some forms at the branch to transfer the DDs/SOs, it turns out this was totally incorrect. They only do this for brand new accounts. Turns out I need to ring each company individually to change bank details. Why are customer services sometimes so hopeless?? :mad:
Ended up having to buy a few things while we were in town anyhow (birthday gift and card). Was starving after long run in morning, so refuelled with ‘healthy’ pasties from bakery . Also, ended up buying some groceries (um, junk and OH’s beer) and a very random £10 language translator from Aldi for upcoming hols. Now regretting the latter as there’s a free iphone app which does something a bit similar – I think.
OH’s virgin c/card statement landed yesterday, stating the £85 interest charge, which is rather annoying indeed as it could have been easily avoided... Ah well, what’s done is done.
Had a nice catch up with friends and spent a grand total of £7 . Was gloriously sunny and really enjoyed the rays over a few pear bulmers on ice... Was within walking distance so no transport costs. I only took a tenner out with me and left my purse at home. Must remember this trick again in future!
Spends yesterday
Language translator - £10
Groceries (aka junk food/OH’s beer) - £7.40
Present & card - £14
Sealant gun and cooker bulbs from B&Q- £6
Day out with friends and food with OH - £10
Total = £47.40
Planning on a NSD and AF day today. Lots of house-work and ironing to do. Oh the joys!

Catzpaws

Lemon_Tree wrote: »

i was thinking of going to the bank today to get a new current account but i'm not sure which bank is less evil than the rest. Sounds like OH has finally gotten out of bed, so we can start on the rest of the day - i've done two loads of washing and put them outside, just been waiting for him to catch up on his sleep

Yeah, I think the banks are pretty much all much of a muchness (a lot of much words in that sentence...!). Our joint account is with Barclays, my personal account is HSBC and OH's personal account is RBS. They're pretty much all the same in my view.