When should children start using public toilets on their own?

barnaby-bear

Nicki wrote: »

I think its all a question of proportion tbh. I have no problems with mums of babies in pushchairs or toddlers using the disabled loos where they need the accessibility. I can tolerate kids of 7 or 8 out with an adult of the opposite sex using them if they aren't mature or sensible enough to use the adult loos unescorted. I have real problems I'm afraid with older non disabled kids using them though because mums are overprotective of 12 and 13 year olds.

I agree it's about people just acting on balance reasonably, disabled people appreciating others may have access / mobility issues and others only using a disabled/accessible facility if appropriate.... however people are very quick to judge if someone's use is inappropropriate - how do you know that walking adult using the disabled loo hasn't had bowel cancer and isn't abusing the facility but needs the use of the private hand washing facilities while they sort out their bag... or that overprotective mum's 12 year old actually was starved or oxygen at birth and only has the mental capacity of a 2 year old....

movingforward2010

barnaby-bear wrote: »

But then especially if you're a tourist whose kid doesn't speak the language and you don't know if it's a dodgy area would you leave a 7 year old, a 5 year year old out on the street.... to do a "Maddy"... or if there's a disabled loo would you nip in there with her....

theres always a disabled loo i've found ( mum has one of those key things, when we take her on days out), but i certainly wouldn't of done what this man did.:eek:

mumps

barnaby-bear wrote: »

I agree it's about people just acting on balance reasonably, disabled people appreciating others may have access / mobility issues and others only using a disabled/accessible facility if appropriate.... however people are very quick to judge if someone's use is inappropropriate - how do you know that walking adult using the disabled loo hasn't had bowel cancer and isn't abusing the facility but needs the use of the private hand washing facilities while they sort out their bag... or that overprotective mum's 12 year old actually was starved or oxygen at birth and only has the mental capacity of a 2 year old....

You made me think of once when I was in fast food restaurant, we had stopped on a journey, my youngest felt sick and I looked at him and realised I needed to move fast so grabbed him and made a dash for the loo. All engaged. came out and went into staff loo opposite and was stopped by a member of staff and told I couldn't use them. I pointed at son who was a fetching shade of green and told her that was fine but other loos full so he could either be sick in staff loo or on the floor. She held the door open for us.:rotfl:

mumps

tiamai_d wrote: »

Nah they last a lot longer than buses!!! :rotfl:

There are several silver cross prams being used in my special care unit at the maternity hospital because they are so big and comfy for babies plus there is the storage space underneath and they are easily cleaned.

They were great but took up a hell of a lot of room in the house. When buggies became fashionable everyone swore that the kids would all grow up with curvature of the spine because they weren't lying nice and flat.

Nicki

barnaby-bear wrote: »

I agree it's about people just acting on balance reasonably, disabled people appreciating others may have access / mobility issues and others only using a disabled/accessible facility if appropriate.... however people are very quick to judge if someone's use is inappropropriate - how do you know that walking adult using the disabled loo hasn't had bowel cancer and isn't abusing the facility but needs the use of the private hand washing facilities while they sort out their bag... or that overprotective mum's 12 year old actually was starved or oxygen at birth and only has the mental capacity of a 2 year old....

I have ulcerative colitis, and my DD's disability is not visible on a quick glance (though anyone who watched her behaviour for a few seconds would spot it), so I personally am well aware of hidden disabilities thanks!

The people who annoy me are those who post on websites or discuss openly in conversation how they personally use the disabled loos to avoid queues or get their kids who are old enough not to need them to use them. Hope that clears things up.

patchwork_cat

Nicki why shouldn't people use disabled toilets to avoid queues? If there is no disabled person waiting then why not? Even if there is if they have no particular reason why they need the toilet quicker than a non disabled person ( although obviously that would be a hard oneas it may not be obvious )why should they jump ahead? That is discrimation.

Having said that some disabled people need the loo in a hurry so do LOTS of non disabled people. 25% of women will experience bladder weakness and many men too. Are we to say I'll wet myself if I have to stand in this queue so I am going in the disabled empty cubicle just sitting there? Wouldn't you look foolish if you did wet yourself and there is an empty cubicle there?

Nicki

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Nicki why shouldn't people use disabled toilets to avoid queues? If there is no disabled person waiting then why not? Even if there is if they have no particular reason why they need the toilet quicker than an non disabled person why should they jump ahead? That is discrimation.

My view (and its a personal one based on having a disabled child who couldn't wait for long after she felt the urge to go) is that it is selfish because:

1. If there are 4 normal toilets and 1 disabled toilet, but the non disabled use any toilet they want to, then the disabled person potentially has to queue for 80% longer than the non disabled because they can only use one out of the five toilets, whereas the non disabled can physically use all five.

2. A lot of disabilities mean that you do need the toilet more urgently than the non disabled. I don't just mean those in wheelchairs, but also those with bowel or bladder problems, conditions which predispose to incontinence, severe learning difficulties for example

I personally don't begrudge a privilege to someone who needs it more than I do, and don't regard that as discrimination. I'll stand up on the tube or bus for an old person or a pregnant woman (well I would do normally but I'm 8 months pregnant myself at the moment :rotfl:) without a second thought, and be happy that I'm not feeling so uncomfortable as to need it. I'll hold a door open for a mum with a buggy, or let an OAP with one item go ahead of me with my family sized trolley in the queue at the supermarket. I don't see this as me being discriminated against because I'm not old or disabled just being considerate for those who have needs which are different to mine. Which IMHO is the kind of view which makes the world a nicer place for all to live in.

patchwork_cat

I do mean if there is a queue and no disbled person waiting, but my point and you seem to agree is don't judge a book by it's cover some one may be disabled and it not be visible and they may or maynot need to use disabled facilities, but similarly someone non disabled may actually need that toilet more immediatley than a disabled person. A lot more people than you think, as I know to my cost suffer, incontinence - (does pelvic floor exercise in vain attempt to help!)

Nicki

patchwork_cat wrote: »

I do mean if there is a queue and no disbled person waiting, but my point and you seem to agree is don't judge a book by it's cover some one may be disabled and it not be visible and they may or maynot need to use disabled facilities, but similarly someone non disabled may actually need that toilet more immediatley than a disabled person. A lot more people than you think, as I know to my cost suffer, incontinence - (does pelvic floor exercise in vain attempt to help!)

Yes - I would have no problem at all with knowing that someone with a weak pelvic floor nipped into the disabled loo rather than have disaster strike . Not sure why you think anything I posted suggested I would have a problem with that though . I thought I was very clear that anyone with an access problem (such as a baby in a pushchair) or a genuine need for urgent access (which could just be a sudden bout of food poisoning) were OK, but I was specifically addressing my criticism to those who don't have such problems (and know they don't) but nonetheless inconvenience those who do because of a sense of entitlement.

patchwork_cat

I did say you seem to agree, but my point is I would hope that you wouldn't know I had a problem and if you saw might think cheeky cow.