My little boy has just nearly drowned in his swimming lesson

milliemonster

Just got back from my 6 year olds swimming lesson in a right state. He has been going for lessons for around 12 weeks now and has been moved up 2 groups in the last couple of weeks.

He has never been very confident in water but his teacher is great, she is strict and firm but really builds up the kids confidence and they really respect her, he has come on leaps and bounds although can't swim very strongly yet, he just flaps his arms around a bit and manages to keep afloat for a few seconds!

Anyway, this week is his first week being moved up again in a different class, his normal teacher is sick so there is a stand in. Now the last couple of weeks they have taken his group up to the deep end and had them jumping in, he has been fine with that.

This week, the new teacher made them jump in then swim across the middle of the pool towards the steps, my son was the last one to do this and as I was watching the others from the viewing area at the other side of the pool I was nervous as I didn't think he would have the strength to swim across the distance he would need to to get to the steps.

When he jumped he, I could see he was moving across quite well and then just seemed to be treading water, the teacher wasn't watching him but was walking around to the steps to greet the others out of the pool.

I could then hear him panicking over the noise of the others in the pool and then I saw him go under and not come back up, the teacher jumped in a got to him and he was fine just shocked, crying and dreadfully upset, I feel sick.

She tried to console him and brought them all back to the shallow end and was cuddling him but he was inconsolable. I came round to the pool trying not to get in a panic myself as I didn't want to distress him anymore and she came up to me to say that 'he didn't work hard enough' as if to try and make light of it.

My little boy is so upset and so am I I don't know what to do. I feel that he shouldn't have been allowed to swim in the open deep area of the pool when she could see from the rest of the lesson up to that point how strong he was (ie not very!)

Also this has just completely destroyed the confidence he has built up over the last few weeks with his regular teacher and he has now said he never wants to go again.

I haven't complained as I'm not sure if I'm overreacting but I was so scared as I could see what was going to happen and when you are at the other side of the pool and you see your child in difficulty and then disappear under the water I can't begin to tell you how I felt!

What should I do?

dmg24

I think you are overreacting. The teacher took the correct action in the circumstances, and the best thing to do to move forward would be to get your son back in the water as soon as possible.

mrcow

If he doesn't want to go again, then don't take him.

Take him swimming yourself and then he'll get the one to one attention he needs.

My kids swim just fine and haven't had a "lesson" in their lives.

alwaysonthego_2

Your poor little boy, I bet it was awful seeing your son under the water.

All children have different abilities and her job as a teacher should have been to assess how well he could swim. If your son is not ready to swim long distances, then he is not ready and should not be pushed.

I would arrange for a meeting to discuss the incident and what the way forward is.

ChrisCobra

Agree with dmg , if you think he wasnt ready for that you should have said maybe , i would have been in the water before the teacher thats for sure

Glad he is ok though!

milliemonster

Thanks dmg24, I know the teacher did everything correct in how she responded to the incident, but I am just upset that he has been pushed a bit too far too soon, I agree I need to get him back into the water asap though

Takoda

Well - you could wait until his regular teacher is back before you take him again. He trusts her and that will give him a bit of space to forget the incident.

Or there are lots of other good suggestions above.

You know your son best so you'll choose the right one.

milliemonster

ChrisCobra wrote: »

Agree with dmg , if you think he wasnt ready for that you should have said maybe , i would have been in the water before the teacher thats for sure

Glad he is ok though!

Trouble is the viewing area is far away from where they were, I was getting up when I could see he wasn't getting anywhere fast and then saw him go under and her jump in, it was so quick I think I was just too stunned.

I had presumed he was maybe ready for it beforehand as I didn't go last week my dh took him and told me he had jumped in the deep end, so I just presumed they had done this with him before and he'd been ok?

fernliebee

I don't think you are over reacting, I think it is natural to feel how you do after seeing that. I think the teacher should have kept a very close eye on him if she was in any doubt as to his ability, and the comment about him not trying very hard, is awful!! I would complain about that alone.

I do agree with dmg though that you should get him back in the water again asap. I would approach nice teacher and see if he can be moved back down to a lower group to re-build his confidence. How about you going as a family and just staying in very shallow water to build his confidence.

I really feel for you though, it's horrible to see something so frightening and feel helpless to do anything, also the fact that his confidence is shattered is distressing for you to see after he had been doing so well.

jinky67

milliemonster wrote: »

Thanks dmg24, I know the teacher did everything correct in how she responded to the incident, but I am just upset that he has been pushed a bit too far too soon, I agree I need to get him back into the water asap though

If as you say he was "flapping around" then I would be questioning why he has been moved groups so soon:cool:
It doesnt sound to me like he is at all ready for "proper" swimming yet

MrsTinks

Playing devils advocate here - but if you were there then why did you let him join a lesson that took place in the deep end if you had concerns about his ability to stay afloat in there?
By all means have a word with the pool manager about it - either the brief given by the normal teacher to the stand in wasn't accurate enough or they weren't experienced enough to recognise your son maybe shouldn't have been moved up to that class yet.

The most important thing I think is actually your son and his statements about not wanting to go again ever... I'd suggest going back with him yourself and do 1 on 1 or even have a word with his usual teacher and ask if she'd do a 1 on 1 with him. Explain what happened and that he obviously trusts her. Then try to convince him that with his teacher or you there he'd be fine and safe and that she's always looked after him before etc - maybe even get one of the floatation jackets designed for swimming? Sure I've seen some about that were actually quite trendy.
The good news is that he's ok Try not to make too big a deal about it but maybe offer some bribery for him to go back? Icecream?