Taxis back to basics...debt and mortgage free before 50(feb 2014)

taxi73

Sorry about these long posts .....

So today I need to do practical things....

(1) I need to get a sick note from the DR
(2) I need to phone the breast cancer nurse and ask a couple of questions
(3)Phone the benefit helpline to see if I can claim any benefits while I'm off sick
(4) Find my insurance critical illness insurance documents and see if I can claim anything on there

Think that's about all I can handle for now.

hypno06

Firstly, it is great that you have critical illness cover - even if it doesn't cover everything, it could make a huge difference. One of our best friends had breast cancer (in remission 5 years now) and the critical illness cover was very quick to pay out.

Secondly, re JJ - kids are far more resiliant than we tend to give them credit for. You may be better telling him now, about some special medicine that might make you a bit sick, and that you will have your hair fall out but maybe he can help you choose some "new" hair, or a special hat? You don't need to mention death at all, and if he says "will you die, Nana?" you can say "no, I'm a tough old boot and I need to keep Grampy in order....." type thing!

Thirdly, take all the complementary stuff that you can - it won't do you any harm, and it will be a lovely way to relax during all the stressy stuff that is going on. When I was self employed, doing the therapy stuff, it was the cancer patients who really did get the most benefit, on so many levels - make the most of it, especially as a lot will be free, or minimal cost for you.

Fourthly, DH may find it difficult to deal with - especially if you go for a mastectomy. Even though it is you who is losing (potentially) a breast, it is often the partner that feels like a part of them is being lost. (Freud probably had a field day with this one!). That in turn, can be hard for you to deal with as you want to shout "It is ME that is going through this, its not as if YOUR privates are being lopped off" type thing. If there is any counselling that is available for him, therefore, or family counselling, it may be worth seeking that out, to reduce any possible additional stress there, that neither of you need right now!

Fifthly, have some virtual jaffa cakes xxx

taxi73

Thanks Hypno....DH said he didn't want me to die...I said I had no intention of dying and that most people lead a long life afterwards.He seems ok with that.
I will tell JJ if he needs to know ..especially if I have chemo.The way you put it was a good way.
I'm pretty sure I'll be covered on the critical illness cover which will be a godsend if I am.
Have a good day x

hypno06

When do you think your treatment will start?

REDMADCURLS

Taxi

So delighted to hear your voice, as it where!

Re: Complementary therapies................couldnt agree with HYpno more....................they are great for people with cancer.

I also agree with Hypno re JJ, kids are resilient and they are also hyper sensitive, they pick up on every 'change' around them and if they are not given a reason for the change, they make one up................usually much worse and more sinister than reality. If you are able to, tell him in his language and as little as you can get away with.........but no lies. When I once worked in a hospice, a little girl told me she would never go to sleep again because her dad had a headache and some day he wasn't going to wake up! I guess the person who told her dad had a headache thought they were being helpful!

The breast cancer nurse has many answers even to questions you haven't thought of yet......................use her for all the support she can give

And you are so very right,,,,,,,,,,,you are an extremely strong lady and therefore you will beat this and even though it will be rough some days.........you will come out the other end even stronger (if thats possible)

With lots and lots of positive energy and good vibes

RMC

Double_Trouble

Taxi I agree with everything Hypno said especially about JJ my sister had the lump removed and the nodes and had radiotheraphy and chemotheraphy she had two young grandchildren the youngest being a similar age to JJ and she told them as much as was possible and they coped really well children are far more resilient than grown ups and the death question never even occured to them - re hair loss my sister's hair yesterday looked lovely she now has waves in it and it seems a lot thicker to me than it was before my other sister is jealous as she pays to have curls put in hers!

You are doing really well take all the help you can get and for once be selfish and concentrate on you.

Love and hugs

DTxx

PS forgot to say my mom had breast cancer 20 years ago and is still going strong

40somethingmum

Morning Taxi:)

Sending you lots more virtual hugs & kisses.

Fantastic post from Hypno.... I agree with everything she has said.

Be good to yourself

Love

40Smxx

elantan

hey taxi .. so your up stamping your feet and ready to kick !!! .. just like the taxi we know and love ... nice one ...

i think its very common for people to have these meetings and forget most things .. although people try and listen and understand so many more things are going on right at that moment it is kinda hard ... nurses are used to this which is possibly why she will probably be expecting your call ...

totally agree with hypno as well ... and if you can get any freebies at all go for it ... can i just suggest you get a dr's letter stating you are able to have treatments .. i know when i was learning therapies we were always taught dont touch anybody with (virtually) any illness unless they have a dr's letter ..might just mean you get a therapy a wee week early or something ... and that is always good

ok things i have read that help in the fight against cancer ... plenty of vitamin orange for some reason the wee blighter cells hate this stuff (and it is good for the body too) ... and no sugar for some reason the wee blighters love the stuff ...

other things as well but dont want to put my neb in where its not wanted so to speak

good luck on your journey honey we'll be with you on your way and standing at the finish line with cheesy grins as you win

Verbatim

Hi taxi,

I haven't been following your diary but have "met" you on others. I'm sorry to hear about the breast cancer. Your positive and determined attitude I'm sure will serve you well. Great advice from Hypno, as ever, and I too hope you take very good care of yourself.

My sister's m-in l had breast cancer in the late 70s and she's still going strong well into her 80's. I hope your treatment goes well. If your hair falls out there's a charity run by Trevor Sorbie, a famous hairdresser, to make sure the wigs are flattering and fit the image the woman wants to project.

Verbatim

http://www.trevorsorbie.com/index.php

Ah I've managed to copy the link ................