Fussy Eaters (merged)

Loopy_Girl

mikey72 wrote: »

Depends on what has happened previously, and what habits they develop.
Some children will get used to not eating, so they will actually starve themselves.
How many days would you let your child refuse to eat for before worrying?

Can't answer the question as I wouldn't let the 'habit' form in the first place.

Loopy_Girl

at_my_wits_end wrote: »

am not going to give her a pudding if she does not at least try to eat some dinner.

Great news that she had a meal tonight and that she got rewarded with a sticker,

Have to say about the point that I quoted tho...if I am reading it correctly you are still going to give pudding 'even if she tries'...so she could put it in her mouth a couple of times and then still get a pudding? Personally I would steer away from puddings at all for the moment and stick to the sticker reward.

I agree with GR though that if you are giving her sweets and crisps during the day then she may just not be hungry. If I could be honest, I think you are filling her up with snacks and crap during the day which means she is not eating her meals.

You need to get back to basics and start working out a proper breakfast/lunch/tea and not caving in to requests for yoghurts/babybels/sweeties/crisps et al. At her age she should be having a morning and afternoon snack but that should be half an apple or a sandwich made with one slice of bread. Even a glass of milk is an acceptable snack.

Tonight you have seen that she can eat a meal so you know there is nothing physically wrong with her. Kids that age are starting to be aware of their world and seeing how far they can push things but if you have a routine in place, it gives her boundaries and also means that she is clear about what happens at mealtimes and what kind of food will be offered.

mikey72

mikey72 wrote: »

Depends on what has happened previously, and what habits they develop.
Some children will get used to not eating, so they will actually starve themselves.
How many days would you let your child refuse to eat for before worrying?

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

Can't answer the question as I wouldn't let the 'habit' form in the first place.

Course you can, you know you wouldn't let it happen, so you know you can beat any potential eating disorder.

So if you give them the choice of what you say or nothing, in your scenario, would you leave them 5 days, 10 days, would you hold them down and force feed them?

Loopy_Girl

No I can't answer you as I can't see the scenario.

These threads come up now and again on here and I am always amazed about the list of 'fussy eaters'...it's never "OMG, all little Jonny will eat is grilled chicked, carrots, asparagus, smoothies and cheese". It's all the crap of the day that is on the list - processed laden with sugar and salt crap.

If kids aren't introduced to these kind of things at an early age then they can't be 'fussy' about it and fixate on it.

I agree that kids have tastebuds too but flooding them with the stuff that is always mentioned is hardly going to get them to sit down and eat a home cooked meal is it? Nah...bring on the fatty, salty and deep fried stuff (or out of a tin).

Personally I think that weaning is the formative stage. If babies are given a wide range of tastes and textures then it's not such a shock when they start to eat the lumpy food. How can a kid demand that they will only eat something if they haven't had the chance to taste it?

On the other thread there is cause for celebration as the child has started to drink milk...chocolate milk. What's the chances of her drinking normal milk now as everytime she gets/asks for milk, she will be expecting the chocolate stuff. Personally I don't think adding yet another high sugar load of additives to the food list is an acheivement.

Thanks for the sarcasm but it was unwarranted as I don't beleive in children this age having 'eating disorders' so there would be nothing for me to 'beat'.

Rainey_LB

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

No I can't answer you as I can't see the scenario.

These threads come up now and again on here and I am always amazed about the list of 'fussy eaters'...it's never "OMG, all little Jonny will eat is grilled chicked, carrots, asparagus, smoothies and cheese". It's all the crap of the day that is on the list - processed laden with sugar and salt crap.

If kids aren't introduced to these kind of things at an early age then they can't be 'fussy' about it and fixate on it.

I agree that kids have tastebuds too but flooding them with the stuff that is always mentioned is hardly going to get them to sit down and eat a home cooked meal is it? Nah...bring on the fatty, salty and deep fried stuff (or out of a tin).

Personally I think that weaning is the formative stage. If babies are given a wide range of tastes and textures then it's not such a shock when they start to eat the lumpy food. How can a kid demand that they will only eat something if they haven't had the chance to taste it?

On the other thread there is cause for celebration as the child has started to drink milk...chocolate milk. What's the chances of her drinking normal milk now as everytime she gets/asks for milk, she will be expecting the chocolate stuff. Personally I don't think adding yet another high sugar load of additives to the food list is an acheivement.

Thanks for the sarcasm but it was unwarranted as I don't beleive in children this age having 'eating disorders' so there would be nothing for me to 'beat'.

Why are you so judgmental......and tarring all with the same brush?

I don't think the people posting are assuming that their children have eating disorders just looking for advice from others who have found themselves in similar situations, of how to introduce other foods to children who do not willingly try & accept new things.

Not all children who are fussy are fed junk food in-between or for their meals, but the problem more often lies with young children not liking certain textures & unfamiliarity.

I think its wrong to blame and assume its something the parents are doing or have done wrong, its very common, no 2 children are the same, my first is a very good eater my second not, they were both weaned in the same way with home cooked food, were not given 'junk' snacks or deserts, I even made ice lollies with pure fruit juice or from smoothies & yoghurt. I couldn't tell you the last time I brought them sweets as I think the treat they get when nanny visits is enough. In between meals they have fruit.

mikey72

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

No I can't answer you as I can't see the scenario.

These threads come up now and again on here and I am always amazed about the list of 'fussy eaters'...it's never "OMG, all little Jonny will eat is grilled chicked, carrots, asparagus, smoothies and cheese". It's all the crap of the day that is on the list - processed laden with sugar and salt crap.

If kids aren't introduced to these kind of things at an early age then they can't be 'fussy' about it and fixate on it.

I agree that kids have tastebuds too but flooding them with the stuff that is always mentioned is hardly going to get them to sit down and eat a home cooked meal is it? Nah...bring on the fatty, salty and deep fried stuff (or out of a tin).

Personally I think that weaning is the formative stage. If babies are given a wide range of tastes and textures then it's not such a shock when they start to eat the lumpy food. How can a kid demand that they will only eat something if they haven't had the chance to taste it?

On the other thread there is cause for celebration as the child has started to drink milk...chocolate milk. What's the chances of her drinking normal milk now as everytime she gets/asks for milk, she will be expecting the chocolate stuff. Personally I don't think adding yet another high sugar load of additives to the food list is an acheivement.

Thanks for the sarcasm but it was unwarranted as I don't beleive in children this age having 'eating disorders' so there would be nothing for me to 'beat'.

So the answer is not to wean at mcdonalds then.
Guess that's where we have all gone wrong.

fernliebee

Loopygirl- I really don't think your post is very helpful to the OP who is obviously trying to turn her daughters eating habits around while she is still young.

Your post is very judgemental, and whilst my DD has never been a fussy eater and will try anything (Hot curry, black olives, chilli etc) I just presumed it was down to her personality more than anything as she is very confident and has no problems giving new things a try, rather than the fact she was breastfed, only weaned on home cooked meals which we would eat, and not given any junk food to try.

My mum fed us on a very healthy, whole food diet growing up, and whilst he had no problems as a toddler my brother developed a fussiness when he was about 5. My mum never pandered to him at all, he could eat what we had or go hungry, but he just chose to go hungry. He literally survived on thin air, then when he was about 11 he started eating for England and is 6ft2 now. I think it was partly a power thing/ stubborness, but I also think he just didn't need a lot of food to keep him going. He always grew fine, and used to have a multivit so he got some nutrients, and the tiny amount of food he would eat (weetabix and peanut butter sandwiches mainly) were fairly healthy.

While I agree that junk food shouldn't be an option for children in an ideal world, I am sympathetic to the fact that some parents can't face their children going to bed hungry, and as I haven't been in that situation I can't guarantee I wouldn't do the same.

jayII

I've worked with some extremely fussy eaters, from toddlers to 10 year olds, and the strategies I have found most helpful include:

Only serving small amounts, children can find huge platefuls daunting.

Serving a range of foods on their plate, both those they like and teaspoon sized servings of foods they dislike (but make sure the foods don't touch, LOL)

Relax, relax, relax, take as little notice as possible of their eating and any moans, but quietly praise them if they try a disliked food. Chat about non-food subjects, and keep mealtime atmospheres fun and relaxing.

These strategies ensure they eat something, however little. They take the focus off the child's eating and reduce tensions around food, and they play upon their natural sense of curiosity. (Though it may take a few weeks before they try 'disliked' foods, just persevere and remove uneaten foods).

If they adamantly refuse to have 'disliked' or strange foods on their plate, just don't put them on, and stick with that. With the pressure and tension removed, they will eventually start to ask why you have foods they don't. With small children, it can help to show obvious enjoyment of your own food, and wait them to want to try it.

at_my_wits_end

Hi again,

Thanks for everyones input.
Clean plate again tonight! (home made chips and a Birdseye Fish Portion). Looks like the sticker incentive is working.

I will hold my hands up and admit that I have been to soft with regards to sweeties and crisps, but that has definately changed. I can't really remember where it all went wrong to be honest, she was a large baby (just under 10lbs) and was breastfed for nearly 18 months and weaned onto homemade baby food.

I do home made food 90% of the time, and sometimes she will even get involved with the cooking (I am a SAHM).

mikey72

Congrats.
Keep at it.