Advice Needed - Neighbours

maggie111

Some people just hate dogs. I love them, but I know when I go round to my family's houses who own dogs, when the doorbell goes and they start yapping - once it's happened for the 3rd time that day it gets annoying. I can only suppose that your neighbour, through thin walls can hear this and eventually it's making him slightly crazy. So, I can sympathise a bit with him.

BUT - according to what you're saying, there is NOTHING that you can do differently. If they bark when the doorbell goes then good - that's what dogs should do.


Now, getting into big fights with the neighbour is NOT A road you should go down. I would hold on to the chance that someone else scratched your car - otherwise you're just going to go crazy for the next few years arguing with this man. In my opinion it's up to you now to make this situation friendly. (Yes, it shouldn't be up to you but if you want your life to be happy you will have to make this man your friend yourself)

Here's what I would do:

Buy your neighbour 2 basketballs. Hopefully this should work out cheaper than giving him £20 anyway, and shows that you're sorry (even though you're not, I mean for goodness sake!!) But you really should keep on good terms with this man, or he'll make your life hell.

You should have an amicable chat with your neighbour - genuinely find out if he has some opinions of what you can do to make his life more comfortable. Tell him that it's no use him throwing wild sentences out there like "your dogs should be under control" because they're dogs, and sometimes they bark. However, should he say "every morning at 7.30 they are in the garden making a racket and I like to sleep in till 9" - then you could compromise and not feed your dogs till 8.30 and let them out after.

If he refuses to talk with you like a normal person, write a letter explaining that you genuinely want to make life work for both of you and asking him to specify his annoyances on paper - that way you can work on them.


(PS - I don't want to see like I'm on this guy's side, I'm not - if my neighbour got some dogs I wouldn't care, nor would I do anything this man has done. I know theoretically it's his problem, and not hers - but if it's making her life unhappy she should be proactive about changing it, and I think I would go down the friendly friendly route)

janninew

Thanks for the advice everybody!

I spoke to a neighbour over the road last night who saw my neighbour next to my car yesterday afternoon, she said she didn't really think anything off it at the time. I've also spoken to the police who have given me a crime number for my insurance, not sure what i should do now? Should i contact the police and tell them what my neighbour has seen?

I've been to a garage this morning for a quote and the damage is going to cost around eight hundred pounds to fix :eek: I can claim on my insurance but i still have a three hundred pound excess to claim, plus i would lose my no claims!! I explained the situation to the police and they told me i shouldn't worry about the dogs, i know that they are quiet dogs, yes they bark once when the doorbell rings, but this hardly ever happens! My neighbours are quite a noisy family, which didn't really bother me, as i except that kids make noise!

Not really sure what my next step should be, but they certainly will not be getting a new ball from me!

maggie111

I understand why you're annoyed but just be really careful about getting the police involved and escalating this. I know he's done wrong but unless you want to move in the next year think *really* hard about whether you want to declare war. It WILL make your life hell.

janninew

maggie111 wrote: »

I understand why you're annoyed but just be really careful about getting the police involved and escalating this. I know he's done wrong but unless you want to move in the next year think *really* hard about whether you want to declare war. It WILL make your life hell.

I know where your coming from, i'm just so angry about it! There is no way i will be forced out of my home by a bully, not a chance! I was wondering also i own my house, but my neighbours rent there from a local letting agent, is it worth contacting them and letting them know? Just don't know what to do for the best.

pinkshoes

If if were you, and were 100% sure the neighbour scratched the car, then I would scratch theirs too in the same way, then knock on their door and let them know that someone's been round scratching cars in the street...

Alternatively (better option!), buy them a new (cheap) ball, and take it round and apologise nicely and politely about the dogs bursting the other one.

Then you can go on to say that someone's keyed your car, and the police said you have to ask the neighbours if they saw anything, as the damage is £800... perhaps even mention your CCTV would have captured it, but the dvd is stuck in the machine at the moment, so it'll be a while before it gets fixed... or mention that the police will be round to talk to the neighbours at some point...

BeenieCat

My concern here is that these muppets will now think they can bully you, knowing they can scratch your car and you won't do anything about it!

I'd be inclined to report them for it, and ask neighbour if they would back you up.

Errata

You'll find yourself in a difficult situation if you start speculating, or accusing, about how your car was scratched. If you tell the police what the neighbour said they may want to speak to them, and often neighbours back down because they don't want to be involved in someone else's problems.
It's a tough world, I'm afraid.

tiamai_d

Or just make sure they know that several neighbours actually saw them near the car when the scratch happened, that should shake them up. Or well, if they were decent it would!

I wouldn't buy a ball either. My kids have lost balls to dogs by kicking them over the fence, they should have been more careful!

We have a dog now who does bark, and is an irritating little toerag to be honest, but I tell him off and he is back in when he starts. Though our area has a lot of dogs and nobody bothers unless it's after 10pm. Usually it's one who starts them all off!

pinkshoes

tiamai_d wrote: »

Or just make sure they know that several neighbours actually saw them near the car when the scratch happened, that should shake them up. Or well, if they were decent it would!

Ohh, that's a good idea, or perhaps mention about someone causing £800 of damage to your car by scratching it, but after reporting it to the police, apparently there's a witness who gave a good description to the police, so hopefully someone will be charged with criminal damage... Point out it's a shame the culprit hasn't come forward, as it could have been sorted out amicably without them getting a police record...

janninew

:oThanks for all the advice!

I really do not know what i'm going to do? I've spoken to my neighbour over the road and she is more than willing to talk to police, i'm just worried what my neighbours will be like with me after this. Though on the other hand i really can't afford to spend five hundred pounds on getting my car fixed and i think why should i spend my hard earned cash on this, it seems totally unfair. I'm going to have a long hard think about this tonight and decide on my course of action tomorrow. At the moment i am inclined to let me neighbour talk to the police as i can't stand the thought that they think they have gotten away with it.