How much should I charge my dd for housekeeping etc?

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
133 replies 12.6K views
MadmonkMadmonk Forumite
507 Posts
edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
My dd has just got her 1st fulltime job after college - I suggested that she should pay £50 per week from her wages of £200+ in housekeeping. She appears to be gobsmacked by this and feels I'm ripping her off! I based my figure on how much cb and ctc I used to get for her (it was infact closer to £80 per week but I thought that was a bit mean so I reduced it to £50. The problem appears to be her boyfriend who's 20 and has never paid a penny to his parents and feels noone should have to pay parents!

I just one some idea wether I'm being mean or not? Any comments welcomed

Madmonk
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Replies

  • Glen0000Glen0000 Forumite
    446 Posts
    A third for board, a third to spend and a third to save.

    You are doing her no favours by letting her live for next to nothing
  • Tell her to go and live rent free at her boyfriends house.;)
    Nature wants the human race to survive. However, it does not depend on us because we are not its only invention.
  • yoni_oneyoni_one Forumite
    590 Posts
    No you are not being mean, you are being pretty generous actually.

    Ask her to try and find somewhere else she could to live for that small amount.

    After she is done looking, failed to find anywhere and yet still thinks you are ripping her off ask her why she thinks you should continue to subsidise her any more than you already would be doing at £50 per week.

    She is an adult now, she can pay more elsewhere or pay less at home, she wont like it but however you look at it, she would still be getting a bargain.
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  • zimm143zimm143 Forumite
    68 Posts
    £50 sounds very fair to me. Maybe you take her to supermarket so she can see how much food costs and show a couple of leccy bills so she gets an idea of that.
  • karenxkarenx Forumite
    5K Posts
    Why dont u start off lower then build it up. As its her first proper job she will need to learn how to budget etc. Tell her first month is say £20 per week then second month is £40 etc. If she is like me when I got my first job she will get a shock to learn what its like having to pay for these things and also the unexpected rise!! This is how my mum done it with me, and by time my digs had gone up I wasnt prepared for the extra outgoings!!
  • zimm143 wrote: »
    £50 sounds very fair to me. Maybe you take her to supermarket so she can see how much food costs and show a couple of leccy bills so she gets an idea of that.


    It would be a waste of time methinks.
    Nature wants the human race to survive. However, it does not depend on us because we are not its only invention.
  • GreenrGreenr Forumite
    286 Posts
    I paid my parents £50 per week once I started work (that was 10 years ago!!). They gave me two months rent free to enjoy my first ever wage packets then I started paying from month 3. I had friends who didn't pay rent and friends who did. The money I paid my parents really helped them out as they're not poor but not rich if you know what I mean. My friends who didn't pay anything had rich parents who didn't need the cash.

    Personally, i think that i benefitted from this as i learnt the value of money from day one. when i moved into my first flat, a lump some out of my monthly wage wasn't a massive shock!

    I think it's right to ask for money, and i will do the same when I have children one day! If i happen to be well off :rolleyes:, i'll still ask for money but save it and maybe put it toward their first house...
  • edited 3 August 2009 at 5:49PM
    LondonDivaLondonDiva Forumite
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    edited 3 August 2009 at 5:49PM
    I had a third for board, a third to spend and a third to save drummed into me & I still live by that mantra now.

    All my friends who didn't save or pay keep have a very difficult time budgeting or saving up for things - they live by the credit card & the real world was a big shock to them.

    The worst ones were the ones whose parents 'took' keep, but then gave it back to them. They didn't bother to save as they knew the money was coming back to them & then went on a shopping binge.

    If it costs you money to have them there (or not actually!) and they are working, you should expect a contribution of money in proportion to salary. Don't also forget that as a grown person sharing the home, that contribution also includes an expectation of help round the house with bins, cleaning, cooking and the washing.

    I would also make sure you stop paying for their things from now on - mobile phone, petrol, car insurance etc. If you have sky etc only because she likes it, then charge her the cost of that as well.

    It's not mean, it's treating her like the tax paying adult she now is and making sure that she doesn't end up with £200+ per week spending money, while you're having to scrimp.
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  • gizmo111gizmo111 Forumite
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    I think I'd be inclined to give her a free couple of weeks/ a month and then £50 sounds more than reasonable. Alternatively does she wish to pay a proportion of the bills and buy her own food?
    Mama read so much about the dangers of drinking alcohol and eating chocolate that she immediately gave up reading.
  • SugarSpunSugarSpun Forumite
    8.6K Posts
    I'd tell her that you're prepared to let her have the first month free to enjoy the pay packet, the second month at £40 to help her figure out a budget, and then £50/week from the third month. Then give her a budget sheet so she can figure out incomings/outgoings and find a way to manage.
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