Quick Marriage Question

TIGs

When me and my hubby got married we only had a small do thingy.

The reason he said "if you think i'm standing in front or a load of people and speaking like a **** you're very much mistaken"

So we compromised, we got married at the registery office with my sister and brother in law as my witnesses and hubbys best friend and his wife as hubbys witnesses, and our little girl as bridesmaid. Thats all. Then went on to a pub for a meal with close family only. We then had a disco in the evening for all our friends and anyone else we didn't invite to the wedding. Worked out really cheap and everyone got invited somewhere along the line.

I would just say one thing don't get married without your mum, although i was happy getting married as i did my dad died a couple of years later and i regrett not having him give me away and now hes gone its something i will never be able to do.

Dr.Lou

I had a very small registry office with four of our friends as witnesses. My family didn't go, not even my mother. My mother was fine with this, as she hates a lot of fuss anyway........my sister got married very recently and had a more 'traditional' wedding, and I can honestly say that I think my mother hated every minute of it.

I really don't regret getting married the way we did. Perhaps have a chat with your mum and discuss it to see how she feels. Hope you have the day you want to have!

Kimberley

My brother got married today in Cornwall, no family were present, it was a quick cheap registery wedding with just two witnesses. We weren't happy not being there, but it was their decision to have it this way.

calleyw

I heard of a couple getting married in their lunch break.

When I wanted to get married. The whole thing started about inviting relatives I could not stand and we where really skint. So I downsized to a registry office wedding and had everyone back for a buffet at my tiny little one bedroom flat.

That meant it was limited on who we could invite as we did not have the space.

My MIL was invited but choose not to come. I did not take it as snub as she had cancer and was not very well. And as it was mine and her sons day there was no way we had the time to keep checking on her.

You have to do what you want not everyone else wants. Yes it does sound selfish saying you want to go away to get married. But if that is what you want then that is what you want.

What if you mother was well enough to travel but could not afford to go what would you do then.

What about a wedding away but when you come back what about a blessing in church and have a very special family meal afterwards.

All the best no matter what you do.


Yours

Calley

Dora_the_Explorer_5

shellybelly wrote:

Hi

Just wanted a few peoples views on this. Myself and my other half want to get married, but we can't afford anything too fancy.

So we have looked into going abroad and seen some really good deals.

BUT my mum can't travel due to illness..... do you think its unfair on her not to be there (i'm her only daughter and this would be her only time to be the mother of the bride)

What should we do????

Why not marry in a register office with only your mum and one of his rellys in attendance and as witnesses, then have 'a bit of a do' afterwards at home/local community hall/pub/whatever? Mums love a bit of a cry at a wedding and as you say, it might be the only chance she'll have. Good luck anyway.

Lady_S

kit wrote:

This is interesting to read.... I think you should do what you want and not worry about your mum.

This may be an issue for me in the future - I want a tiny wedding, just me, OH and our DD. With 2 witnesses we dont know. However my OH's parents will flip out if we did it this way..... its a shame you cant have 'your day' the way YOU want it.

I am in exactly the same situation. Due to circumstances beyond our control my partners ex would go mental about his kids attending. But naturally he really wants them to be there.

We cannot figure out how to go about it and them still be able to attend.

Voyager2002

Lady_S wrote:

I am in exactly the same situation. Due to circumstances beyond our control my partners ex would go mental about his kids attending. But naturally he really wants them to be there.

We cannot figure out how to go about it and them still be able to attend.

What a difficult situation.

Personally, both my wife and I have children from previous marriages. And my feeling is that it is important that the children are present: preferably they should play some part in the ceremony to make it clear that they belong to the family that the wedding creates/celebrates. It is sad that the ex-partner cannot accept the new marriage, but such a person has no right to mess up your wedding.

Voyager2002

shellybelly wrote:

Hi

Just wanted a few peoples views on this. Myself and my other half want to get married, but we can't afford anything too fancy.

So we have looked into going abroad and seen some really good deals.

BUT my mum can't travel due to illness..... do you think its unfair on her not to be there (i'm her only daughter and this would be her only time to be the mother of the bride)

What should we do????

Foreign travel is cheap, but it is perfectly possible to have a wedding here for less than the cost of going abroad. And yes, I do think that it would be very unfair to make it impossible for your mother to attend: marriages are really about families.

morlandbanks

You can't leave your poor mum out of your wedding. As a mum, I'm already dreaming of my daughters special day...and she's only 2 1/2!!!

A registry office is under £40. You can get a bargain on a wedding dress on ebay or in the local rag. Hire his suit. Get a mate to video it and someone else to take pics. There are a thousand money saving ideas for weddings. I'm sure you could still have just what you want without leaving your Mum out of it. How could you even consider it? The woman gave you life??!! Sorry...Getting all emotional now!! LOL

My wedding day was wonderful because I was marrying the love of my life. We couldn't wait, so we did it all with in 6 weeks and on a tight budget. It was so perfect I wouldn't change a single thing. And anyway it's not the wedding that counts you know....It's the marriage.

across

yep i really think youre mum should be able to see you get married my wedding was lovely and im glad i did with my mum there i had thoughts of going to cyprus to get married and my mum said "oh it's too hot for me there!" so there is no way i could have gone!!! i think weddings are family affairs in an ideal world and if my two little girls think they are getting married without me there (if im still here that is) then it would break my heart! children are so special your mum will feel emotional about you getting married anyway please dont do it without her!! good luck you'll have a wonderful day! xx