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asking mum to look after baby?

Our first baby is due in Sept and I currently work full time. I wish to take full 52 weeks off before returning to work and then have been working out figures based on going back full time and paying a nursery place.
I have also been looking at the figures on going back part time working 17.5 hours a week and my mum looking after the little one, which she offered a few months back.....may have changed her mind right enough.
The difference in working full time to part time would mean after paying a nursery I would be better off by 41.00 per week working full time :eek:
However I think I would feel guilty being a burden to my mum and as she works part time mornings herself feel she would be returning from her work to look after our baby.....is that unfair? Would it be best to offer her something per week for putting her out....or do I just feel guilty about things too much?
What does anyone else do whos mum/dad watch the baby?
I would be dropping off and picking up myself so she does not have to do running about (just after a small child).

(this is all depending on whether my work would allow me to return part time but I don't think there would be too big an issue.)
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Comments

  • skintchick
    skintchick Posts: 15,114 Forumite
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    I think your work have to let you go part-time if you ask, as long as it's reasonable. Check the legislation.

    As for your mum, why not talk to her about it? I bet she won't want payment but you could always do something for her in return, or save up some money and treat her every few months as a thank you.
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  • GreenQueen
    GreenQueen Posts: 539 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 500 Posts Photogenic
    Hi, Have you looked into tax credits? I was really surprised when I went back to work - most of my child care costs are paid by tax credits. Depends what you family income is. Also have to work (I think) at least 16 hours a week and your child care provider has to be registered with Ofsted.
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  • MrsTinks
    MrsTinks Posts: 15,238 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker Name Dropper
    Sorry but you only have the right to ASK for flexible work - you do not have the right to get it...
    Under the law your employer must seriously consider any application you make, and only reject it if there are good business reasons for doing so. You have the right to ask for flexible working - not the right to have it.
    From the government website...
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  • pamelab21
    pamelab21 Posts: 341 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Combo Breaker
    thanks,
    I have looked at entitled to and we would get approx 21.00 per week on tax credits whether I work full time or part time.
    Full time nursery in our areas all come in at approx 600.00 per month.
  • galvanizersbaby
    galvanizersbaby Posts: 4,676 Forumite
    pamelab21 wrote: »
    thanks,
    I have looked at entitled to and we would get approx 21.00 per week on tax credits whether I work full time or part time.
    Full time nursery in our areas all come in at approx 600.00 per month.

    Hi

    Could you try for part time hours with your mum looking after baby and see how it goes? - it's hard work looking after a baby on a regular basis and you don't say how many afternoons your mum would be committing to

    It sounds as though your work are going to be fairly flexible with hours so could you put the arrangement in to place and see how it goes?
    I think this is what I'd be inclined to do at first and see how your mum copes and if she is happy to commit permanently.
  • hayleyc_2
    hayleyc_2 Posts: 220 Forumite
    My son is now almost 20months and I went back to work when he was about 10 months old. I went down from full time to 16hrs. At first I was dubious about asking my mum and my fiancee's mum to look after my son, but it's worked out wonderfully. They both really enjoy their day with him, and don't find it too much work. If anything I think my fiancee's mum would have him more often if she could :)

    I think the main thing is not to take it for granted, and to see how it goes. As long as your mum is enjoying her time with the baby and isn't too worn out I'm sure it'll be fine.

    Hayley
  • jackomdj
    jackomdj Posts: 3,073 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts
    Have you thought about going back part time & you Mum looking after baby part of the part time & nursery for the rest? You would not be putting on your Mum so much & baby would still benefit from the social side if nursery

    HTH
    Nicky
  • SandC
    SandC Posts: 3,929 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts
    Most of the mums with young children where I work negotiated to reduce their hours and only work, say 4 days instead of 5. Is there any particular reason why you want to do either full time or 17.5 hours?
  • pukkamum
    pukkamum Posts: 3,944 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I think the main problem with grand parents being the childminder is that it changes the dynamic of the relationship.
    Instead of nan being able to indulge her grandchild and simply enjoy them she becomes the 'mother' doing the disciplining etc.
    Also a lot of our mothers have very different views on child rearing that we do, as much as i love my mum and think she was a great mum i still cringe with certain ways she has of doing things.
    Maybe these are things to think about and maybe having your mum cover a day or two for you and nursery the rest of the time.
    I don't get nearly enough credit for not being a violent psychopath.
  • Spicey
    Spicey Posts: 239 Forumite
    As a grandmother, who has looked after my GD since the age of 3 months, I thought you may like my oppinion. You dont say how old your mother is. You say she has a part-time job. Looking after a baby is great but it becomes a differant matter when they become toddlers. Also the government wont pay for help from grandparents we are expected to be free labour.
    If your mother does look after your child while you work, remember she might not want to babysit at other times or have child overnight. Many of my freinds have also done the unpaid childminder job and I can tell you after a year or 2 it does loose its novelty, so this is when you should start looking for a nursery. I know 2 grandmothers who pay for the nursery fees!
    I know this is a hard choice for you. I wish you all the best.
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