MSE Pregnancy Club XII

aless02

fitz - I was just being silly really . I'm not eligible for WTC (only CTC - should clarify that even if I earned low enough for WTC, my immigration status doesn't allow it; CTC is different and I can claim based on being married to a Brit), sadly. My work does do childcare vouchers, but it's still a staggering cost for 2 people on a budget.

fitzilian19

i know... thats why i'm going into childminding... get to stay at home and look after my little one and earn money too! hoping my sister will come in with me too so theres some adult talk during the day!

childcare vouchers are good... looked into those before childminding became an option...

aless02

good for you! we're still completely in denial about what to do once we have children (esp. more than 1), but good that you have a solid plan

elle_gee

*giggles to self*

Someone official looking has just been into the flat to tell me about the hearing test they want to do on Rhys. She asked me if anyone in the family had hearing problems so I said no, we're all fine.. Then she pointed out she'd been knocking at the door for a good while before I answered - I hadn't heard it! Oops!

tarajayne

elle_gee wrote: »

*giggles to self*

Someone official looking has just been into the flat to tell me about the hearing test they want to do on Rhys. She asked me if anyone in the family had hearing problems so I said no, we're all fine.. Then she pointed out she'd been knocking at the door for a good while before I answered - I hadn't heard it! Oops!

Now that's very embarassing!

Nicki

Thanks a million to skintchick, Tia and Moneymaker for their support last night when I was having major wobbles.

I just got back from my appointment, and I did get a chance to talk to the consultant in detail about how worried I was, and he also explained to me in detail exactly what had happened last time. And I did cry, and get upset and extremely stressed during it all, but I feel a lot better now that I've had that conversation, and can put all the guilt and stress of 8 years into a different perspective. The big thing he said, which helped, was that when DD was born her agpar scores were 9, her breathing was fine and she was not in distress. The brain damage which she has was just something which happened as her brain was developing in the womb, and not anything caused by me at the time of her birth, or at any other time and not anything I could have prevented. I am not sure how I feel about this long term in the context of the baby still to be born, but it has lessened my trauma about the birth a bit I think.

He's given me options for this delivery to think about, and obviously I have a few months to get my head straight and get ready for the birth, but I do feel at the moment in a better state of mind about things.

tarajayne

Sounds like you had a good doctor Nicki, and no 2 births are the same. I have an autistic son so got in a real state before my 20wk scan as he had cysts all over his brain at that stage. Always in the back of my mind but you have to look for positives, your positive is that you sound like you're getting the support you deserve. XXX

mollythewestie

Nicki - so glad you feel better about things now you have spoken to a consultant. (((HUGS)))

tiamai_d

Nicki wrote: »

Thanks a million to skintchick, Tia and Moneymaker for their support last night when I was having major wobbles.

I just got back from my appointment, and I did get a chance to talk to the consultant in detail about how worried I was, and he also explained to me in detail exactly what had happened last time. And I did cry, and get upset and extremely stressed during it all, but I feel a lot better now that I've had that conversation, and can put all the guilt and stress of 8 years into a different perspective. The big thing he said, which helped, was that when DD was born her agpar scores were 9, her breathing was fine and she was not in distress. The brain damage which she has was just something which happened as her brain was developing in the womb, and not anything caused by me at the time of her birth, or at any other time and not anything I could have prevented. I am not sure how I feel about this long term in the context of the baby still to be born, but it has lessened my trauma about the birth a bit I think.

He's given me options for this delivery to think about, and obviously I have a few months to get my head straight and get ready for the birth, but I do feel at the moment in a better state of mind about things.

Glad you feel a bit better. It's not nice when something happens and you have no control over it. We always blame ourselves and it takes a long time to accept that it is just one of those things. But we are not to blame. I think it's harder to accept that than anything else tbh.

Kids collected, didn't get garlic (for spaggy bol) and now I really think I should call the hospital. Headache is worse and I now think I have a UTI too. The pains I had been getting last night have gotten worse and I feel like I constantly need the loo and I'm all gross down there (put a pad on as something is leaking and I think it's wee). Going to take more paracetamol and see how I feel.

aless02

tia - don't mess about, call the hospital! your/baby's health is the most important thing here.