Forum Home» Benefits & Tax Credits» Child Support

REMO-Reciprocal Enforcement of Maintenance Order

New Post Advanced Search

REMO-Reciprocal Enforcement of Maintenance Order

edited 16 January 2010 at 3:30PM in Child Support
455 replies 192.7K views
PlayingHardballPlayingHardball Forumite
761 posts
edited 16 January 2010 at 3:30PM in Child Support
Hi all, has anyone got an ex who has moved to another country and stopped supporting their child, as in my case? My ex had been payinig through CSA for 5 years, suddenly got a job in Germany and now CSA can't do anything as he no longer resides here. My question is, has anyone out there gone the route I'm going with a REMO via the courts and been successful? I haven't had a payment since last June and the effect on my daughter has been significant, to say the least. Oh...and him? Well, he is still enjoying short breaks in his house in the south of france, nice one eh? Unfortunately for the ex-I'm not a quitter and am treating this as my 'newest hobby'.
It would be great to hear a success story! Cheers everyone!:)


  • GailoGailo Forumite
    18 posts
    Was directed to you by a helpful poster, my ex is about to skip the UK, so I was trying to do everything I can to untangle this mess before he leaves for his new life. I never dreamed there would be others like me, he's done everything he could all along to duck responsibilities and seems pleased to have found an easy way out by leaving the country. It may be not much consolation to you, but I think I'm about to embark on the same hobby as you!
  • Well, avoid some of the mistakes I made such as:
    If your ex is paying via the CSA - don't inform them he is moving, and lets hope he doesn't inform them either. If you do inform them, they will close your case. If it stays open, arrears will build.

    Immediately contact your Magistrate Court which handles REMO's and get the paperwork sent to you.

    Get a UK court order, if you don't already have one. (to send off with the Reciprocal Enforcement Order which will spead things up in the other country)

    I've been passed from pillar to post for the past 13 months, first the CSA haven't acted on information I provided (its a long story), and now I'm struggling to get any results from REMO.

    Another helpful poster on here has told me that I need to have a UK court order to send to the reciprocal country, and I'm just now going to look into this and confirm if this is the case. If it is, I'll be going down that route, but would have preferred to do it from day one 13 months ago.

    As far as my hobby, I know it sounds terrible, but that is how I'm treating this, otherwise I'd be stressed and turn bitter like the ex has turned (always HATED he had to pay ME child support, he sees it as my 'holiday fund'. It is terrible that NRP can get away with this, but it seems the easy route, move and make life difficult for those left looking after their children. I'm hopeful that REMO will seek arrears. If they do, the ex will be even bitter and twisted than he already is.

    Oh well, he is the one who suffers in the long run, we have older children as well who are seeing the impact this is having on the younger child who support is due, and they are all starting to 'turn' on their Dad (not my doing, I might add,I've been supportive of her continuing a strong relationship with her Dad throughout my 'hobby') So much partner and I take her to and from the airport to visit him. Am I a mug? :rolleyes:

    Good luck, I'll keep my eye out for your posts. I'd offer you to PM me, but now sure how, but if you know, and you need any support, please do.
  • Lil2002Lil2002 Forumite
    296 posts
    From Google

    How to apply

    A UK resident who wishes to apply to obtain maintenance from a person overseas should approach:
    • their local magistrates' court (or county court where the order was made) if they have an existing court order for maintenance; or
    • their local magistrates' court if there is no existing order.
  • Hi Gailo....
    You are in Scotland, right? Hope this helps....
  • GailoGailo Forumite
    18 posts
    Am totally blown away by how much more advice and support there is here, I really had no idea how prevalent this situation is. I now have about 1000 times more info through you that any in real life. It looks like I will need to sort out the court order first of all.
    I'm a mug too by the way, myself and my now husband (also a mug) helped my ex furnish it when he found a house, and covered up when he couldn't afford his childs birthday/Christmas. No more!
  • Just an update and WARNING for those of you who are going the REMO route - Gailo in particular. I made a big mistake. I TRUSTED the Magistrate court to forward all my documents to London's REMO office to forward to the reciprocal country (Germany in my case). I used to call on a semi regular basis for updates, and until this week I didn't realise anything was amise.

    Well here is an update! It seems they sat on my paperwork for 5 MONTHS!!! That is 5 months less of child support which Germany could have enforced. This info was provided by the London REMO office, so is true.

    I've today written to the Magistrate Courts to demand an explaination, and copied my MP.

    Still getting nowhere. And ex has not not paid a penny towards our child for over a year. At least one consolation - the paperwork (I am told) was sent to Germany on 16th July. I'll keep you posted.

    This is tiring and really frustrating business.... :(
  • GailoGailo Forumite
    18 posts
    I just spotted this, I feel completely outraged, so can only imagine how you are feeling.
    That is an inexcusable disgrace, an explanation is the very least you deserve right now.
    It continues to shock me how little care is shown to PWC and the children who deserve support. It must affect your daily life, I hope this finally gives the process a huge kick up the backside.
  • Hi, thanks for your outrage, I just wanted to warn others out there that you must keep on top of everyone, CSA and Magistrates Courts if using REMO. My letter demanded an explanation, and I told them I was copying the letter to my MP.

    I got my answer yesterday from the Magistrates courts....get this....! My contact within the court office has passed my query to her boss as she feels that my disatisfaction is out of her control. Unfortunately the new contact is away on holiday until the 18th August. My next step will be to meet with my MP and see if I can get the inept bunch to pay compensation for the 5 months in which my child has been having to do without. Seriously, I will now be putting everything in writing, and writing to them at least every other week.

    Its bad enough that my ex hasn't been paying, but then, if he's had an extra 5 month break, he's the lucky one.
  • edited 6 August 2009 at 9:18PM
    Blonde_BintBlonde_Bint Forumite
    1.3K posts
    edited 6 August 2009 at 9:18PM
    Hang on a minute (the hamster just woke up:o) :mad: and your running his daughter back and fourth at your expense to the airports all the while he aint paying A BEAN :mad::mad: in any way humpfff.

    Well I think your a bit nicer than I am. While I dont think I would actively obstruct contact, I think I might make it his concern to arrange pick up and drop off of the child. :mad: let him stick that in his pipe n choke on it. I hope you dont send her with spending money too, strewth.

    Lets face it sometimes we have more money than at other times, even if we dont have much we can always give something. Some months at the moment we cant afford anything so the father in law makes the payment, I would rather rack up payments to him (at no interest charge and incurring no arrears thanks father in dad:j) she doesnt need to know where the money came from does she;)
  • Thanks Blonde, well, , I did ask for some help towards getting her to the airport, perhaps I'll ask again before the event next week. Your point proves I'm not being unreasonable. I'm like you, almost ALL months there isn't enough, so its a sacrifice for daughters sake.
Sign In or Register to comment.

Quick links

Essential Money | Who & Where are you? | Work & Benefits | Household and travel | Shopping & Freebies | About MSE | The MoneySavers Arms | Covid-19 & Coronavirus Support