Tips wanted for Newbie due to take on Mortgage and Marriage!

Lady_Pink

mdean wrote:

http://www.statistics.gov.uk/cci/nugget.asp?id=170

I know we are all different but I really do not understand those who get dewy eyed about marriage. I respect devout religious people who get married in the church, mosque etc because of beliefs

But the aww its nice group - click the link and smell the coffee.

There is no reason for agnostics and atheists to get married full stop

rant over

I agree with the post that followed this - there are plenty of reasons to get married, religion aside. I'm not one of the "aww it's nice" group but even if I was, why should that matter?

I'm assuming that you are not married then, mdean?

mdean

Lady_Pink wrote:

I agree with the post that followed this - there are plenty of reasons to get married, religion aside. I'm not one of the "aww it's nice" group but even if I was, why should that matter?

I'm assuming that you are not married then, mdean?

Never married and probably never will.

I am not religious, I believe the state has no place in regulating our relationships. I think it should have no place in our law - but obviously be allowed for those who want it for religious reasons

With the exception of helping out someone get round imigration there is nothing in fiobee's list which I would see as a benefit - more like a cost

You have just got to read threads like http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=174559 which show how much trouble and heartache is caused as a direct result of marriage.

Add that to the sickening waste of money and social pressure to cough up for expensive stag/ hen nights, presents, hotels etc described here http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=174707 I can see no benefit especially when "aww bless" one in four will be divorced in a couple of years.

Lady_Pink

mdean wrote:

Never married and probably never will.

I am not religious, I believe the state has no place in regulating our relationships. I think it should have no place in our law - but obviously be allowed for those who want it for religious reasons

With the exception of helping out someone get round imigration there is nothing in fiobee's list which I would see as a benefit - more like a cost

You have just got to read threads like http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=174559 which show how much trouble and heartache is caused as a direct result of marriage.

Add that to the sickening waste of money and social pressure to cough up for expensive stag/ hen nights, presents, hotels etc described here http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=174707 I can see no benefit especially when "aww bless" one in four will be divorced in a couple of years.

Thank you for that little ray of sunshine. Have you got any contributions to make about what I actually asked for help on in my post - ie saving money when paying for mortgages etc? If you have I'd appreciate them, rather than getting into a social debate :-)

jobbingmusician

Someone has already sent you to have a look on the OldStyle board, but you'll also get really excellent budgeting tips (the best!) on the Debt Free Wannabee board. They're the people who are the top experts at sorting out SOA (statements of accounts) and will give you loads of good advice, whether you are currently in debt or not!

Sorry you are suffering here from some people who don't believe in marriage. I wish you a very long and happy life together. (I've been married nearly 2 years now, having got married - deeply in love quite unexpectedly - after half a century of being on my own! Can't believe it's nearly 2 years already!!!!!!)

Broken_hearted

It's not marriage people don't believe in it's starting off married life in a load of debt, wasting money on a wedding that statisticaly wont work as money problems are the most common reason for fights and divorce.

Lady_Pink

Broken_hearted wrote:

It's not marriage people don't believe in it's starting off married life in a load of debt, wasting money on a wedding that statisticaly wont work as money problems are the most common reason for fights and divorce.

I can see what you're saying but, after a few years in debt, ironically enough planning this wedding has left me in better financial shape than I've been in for years - I had reason and incentive to start being careful with money and as I'm with someone who makes me happy I'm not misery shopping, a bad habit of mine.

Anyway, all I can say is I'll meet you here on the boards in 50 years time and let you know if my parent's money was well spent on our wedding and if we're still together. I didn't realise I was starting such a contentious moral debate, LOL.

jobbingmusician

I do think you're all (well, not all, but quite a lot of you!) being rotten to a new poster!!! Please try to answer the question, not lecture her!!!!!!!!! :mad:

lizzie12_2

Hi Lady Pink.
Congratulations on your forthcoming wedding.... how exciting!!
This is an excellent site to gain tips from lots of people. We have taken lots of advice over the difficult months and its been well worth it.
Have what you wish for your wedding, as long as you stick to your budget, memories will last forever. xxxx