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Wedding Invitation!
gilly41
Posts: 909 Forumite
Hi
We have just got an invite from hubbies cousin to his Wedding. In with the invitation was a number to quote at a posh shop to look at the list and if we dont want to purchase off that they would "be over the moon" with a monetary contribution!!!
Is it me thinking how rude it all sounds or am I out of touch with Weddings??
When I got married to first hubby back in 1983 I was grateful for anything- wasnt really that bothered if people got me a pressie or not!!! and when i married second hubby we asked for donations for a charity!!!
Hubby never sees his cousin and I dont even know him----worked out that the whole day including our drinks , taxi to the venue etc and a decent pressie is going to cost us more than we can afford. Plus we would need a new outfit each!!
Sorry to rant----just never had an invite with a pressie list included!!!
xx
We have just got an invite from hubbies cousin to his Wedding. In with the invitation was a number to quote at a posh shop to look at the list and if we dont want to purchase off that they would "be over the moon" with a monetary contribution!!!
Is it me thinking how rude it all sounds or am I out of touch with Weddings??
When I got married to first hubby back in 1983 I was grateful for anything- wasnt really that bothered if people got me a pressie or not!!! and when i married second hubby we asked for donations for a charity!!!
Hubby never sees his cousin and I dont even know him----worked out that the whole day including our drinks , taxi to the venue etc and a decent pressie is going to cost us more than we can afford. Plus we would need a new outfit each!!
Sorry to rant----just never had an invite with a pressie list included!!!
xx
Sealed pot challenge 7...my number is 2144.....started Nov 29th ....
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Comments
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Hiya. I think lots of people do send out present lists with invitations these days....but I do know what you mean, if you are the sort of person who would be happy to receive anything if at all (just want to see your friends & family on your big day is nice enough eh?) then this can seem quite errrr, surprising?
OH & self did not go to his cousins wedding last year as the whole day would have cost us a fortune to get there on train (it was at a posh place in Scotland and then we wold have had to get a taxi or hire a car to get from the train station...plus a hotel etc etc) it just was out of the question.
We just sent the RSVP back saying we couldn't make it.
Maybe they will be pleased if you can't go - it will cost them less to feed two people they also don't know very well these days!? I don't mean that nastily...it's just a thought. People sometimes invite long lost family out of "duty".
Hope that makes sense.
LA xBank Balance: In the black for the moment.
Sainsburys Loan: Cleared July 2010
Credit cards: AMEX Airmiles Card: direct debit set to clear balance monthly
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When my mate got married, it cost ME £1,000! :eek:
That was a stag 'long' weekend in Prague, spending (beer) money, then 2 nights hotel room at the wedding, present, drinks! :doh:0 -
if you and hubby can't afford it and aren't really bothered about not going then I would be tempted to write back saying that you unfortunately can't go but hope they have a lovely day!
I agree though withe the other poster who suggests you may have got the invite out of "duty" - when we got married I only invited certain relatives becuase I had to and not because I wanted to!2014 Target;
To overpay CC by £1,000.
Overpayment to date : £310
2nd Purse Challenge:
£15.88 saved to date0 -
I think that this is becoming the norm now - as a while ago people didnt live together before being married, so didnt accumulate the usual house stuff? Now more people have all their house stuff so a wedding list can try to 'direct' well meaning relatives & friends away from the 35 toasters scenario
But I agree, it can come as a bit of a shock! Specially as the last wedding list I looked at included bottles of wine at about £35 a go (and they wanted 12!!!)
Send an RSVP card saying that you can't make it & send a nice card to the grooms parents house to be read out on the day?0 -
My mate is getting married in Cambridge (I live in Manchester) in a couple of weeks, me and the wife are going - wouldn't miss it for the world, I know it's going to be very expensive but it's a great occasion and I don't mind spending on things like that despite being in debt. I won't use my cards, I've already made provisions for the weekend - i.e overtime at work.
Sometimes you have to bite the bullet, the way I look at it is I'll probably be going to funerals in about 30-40 years so I may as well enjoy the weddings!
I'll keep it as cheap as possible though...just going to relax and enjoy it!0 -
LHM wrote:My mate is getting married in Cambridge (I live in Manchester) in a couple of weeks, me and the wife are going - wouldn't miss it for the world, I know it's going to be very expensive but it's a great occasion and I don't mind spending on things like that despite being in debt. I won't use my cards, I've already made provisions for the weekend - i.e overtime at work.
Sometimes you have to bite the bullet, the way I look at it is I'll probably be going to funerals in about 30-40 years so I may as well enjoy the weddings!
I'll keep it as cheap as possible though...just going to relax and enjoy it!
Yes but it is different if you don't really know the people/relative any more. If it is your mate then of course, you have to be there.....
Anyway LHM - I hope you enjoy the wedding (in my old home town ) Bank Balance: In the black for the moment.
Sainsburys Loan: Cleared July 2010
Credit cards: AMEX Airmiles Card: direct debit set to clear balance monthly
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LookingAhead wrote:Yes but it is different if you don't really know the people/relative any more. If it is your mate then of course, you have to be there.....
Anyway LHM - I hope you enjoy the wedding (in my old home town )
Yes I suppose it is, I wouldn't dream of missing the wedding of friends/family who I care a lot about...suppose it's different if you hardly see/know them.
In that scenario I'd probably send a nice card to them saying you can't make it like has been mentioned earlier in this thread. We had a couple of people who couldn't make our wedding, we weren't offended - it's just one of those things!
Yep...send em a nice card!0 -
LHM wrote:Yes I suppose it is, I wouldn't dream of missing the wedding of friends/family who I care a lot about...suppose it's different if you hardly see/know them.
In that scenario I'd probably send a nice card to them saying you can't make it like has been mentioned earlier in this thread. We had a couple of people who couldn't make our wedding, we weren't offended - it's just one of those things!
Yep...send em a nice card!
Forget about it - you don't even know this person I gave up going to weddings of aquaintances a long time ago - politely thank them for the invite and send you regrets that you cannot attend - even if I wasn't in debt I really can't be bothered spending a fortune on people I barely know0 -
If they are not too old you can bypass the wedding list and buy them a bottle of baby oil and the game of twister . Cheap about £12 in total, a real talking point present and it can be fun.
Re above comment even if you don't attend the wedding etquitte i beleive is to not go but still send a gift0 -
Hi
Thanks for all the replies.I think we will just send a RSVP saying that we cannot attend.
As for sending a pressie
just took a peek at the list
the cheapest looks to be about £35!!! Dont think I,ll bother!!!!
xxSealed pot challenge 7...my number is 2144.....started Nov 29th ....0
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