MONEY MORAL DILEMMA. Would you put £10 in Kitty's birthday kitty?

COF

This question makes the assumption that even if we had a minimum wage job which paid very infrequently, we'd always still just have a tenner (or more) to hand in the wallet?

We're not all rolling in it, you know!

harryhound

I worked most of my life in Central London.
This has the downside that most of the employees are commuters, so there is a tendency to rush for the train or tube.
BUT
Sooner or later, you are going to need the help of your colleagues and anyway you have got to get along with them. So do try and socialise if the occasion occurs during the week.
I agree 10 GBP is way over the top, unless it is some extra special occasions for Kitty and she will be putting her credit card behind the bar somewhere and organising food for the whole office. Even then it should be "secret" in that you can drop you shrapnel, left over from the holiday in Turkey, in the envelope if you really want to. What you write in the card is probably more important.
Employees going on to fame and fortune, or celebrating a highlight in their lives, EG marriage, should be expected to entertain their co-workers:

I've had breakfast in this place, as a nice change from the local greasy spoon.

http://www.londonnet.co.uk/ln/guide/resources/offersavoy.html

and organised a trip to this novelty, as my family mythology claims Huegenot roots. The the entrance hall had a notice proclaiming "City drunks only admitted if in the care of a responsible 12 year old":D

http://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/Attraction_Review-g186338-d260507-Reviews-Dennis_Severs_House-London_England.html

glitterjunkie

Nooooo way! £10 is loads...I have to work nearly 2 hours to earn that! I'd just politely explain that I'd not been there long and hadn't been paid yet, so I'm really sorry but I can't afford it. I wouldn't say outright that it was because I didn't know Kitty - I'd play more on the 'I haven't been paid yet' card instead, and hope people would be understanding.

There's always some collection or other going on at my work too, but mostly it's not pressured - a sign just gets put up saying 'it's so and so's birthday/wedding/leaving do - if you'd like to donate to a collection please see Fred in the general office'. I don't mind that, and if it's someone I know (and like!) I'll usually go and give a couple of quid, or a fiver if I really like them. However sometimes people do come round with a tin and ask too, which I don't like... I was asked to contribute to some woman's birthday that I'd never met a few weeks ago, and in this case I did just say 'sorry, I've never met her so I can't contribute'. I wouldn't expect someone who didn't know me to contribute to mine, so why should I hand over my hard-earned cash for hers? Also, we had a collection for a girl who was leaving to go on maternity leave recently too - I gladly contributed as I did know and like her. We got her some lovely pressies and cards and gave them to her on her last day. But then 6 weeks later when she actually had the baby, there was another flamin' collection! I ended up giving another fiver, but I did feel a bit pressured, and inside I was thinking 'I've already given to this once!'.

People do a lot of sweepstake-type things at my work too, on sports events and so on. And LOADS of sponsor forms go round! The thing is, I don't usually carry cash (if I've got money in my purse I end up wasting it buying magazines and sweets - so I try to put any cash I get into the bank straightaway). So I have to go to the cash machine and get £10 out, and of course I end up just wasting the other £9 on rubbish! It's very hard to keep up with it all when money is tight anyway, esp. if you have a weekly budget to stick to where every penny is accounted for. I hope that one of the good things to come out of the recession might be an end to all this throwing-money-away madness, making us all a bit more careful?

LOUY_2

I would just make up a lie and say:

"Oh wow, Kitty has the exact same birthday as me, I hope me and Kitty are not getting the same present. "

mr-tom_2

glitterjunkie wrote: »

I have to work nearly 2 hours to earn that!

That's a really good way of looking at it and one which hadn't occurred to me, it could be even worse after being netted down.

I've never suggested amounts to give and can't imagine I would, but if I ever found myself doing so, suggesting that the people who earn less give less seems a very sound idea.

Sublime_2

No! Although I wouldn't mind putting a £1 in if I had it, but if I hadn't been paid even that £1 could have bought food/busfares.

amberjet_2

In my first proper job i was asked to put monney in for the leaving pressy of the person i was replacing. We never met.

I said I hadn't been paid yet and my boss said it was okay she'd put in for me and take it out of my first pay. (pay was cash from saturdays till) Not a happy thing; i wasn't even over NI threshold.

After that I just told them I couldn't afford it. No one was ever pleased with the 'company' pressy but when a bunch of freinds got together on one we knew she'd like/need/use the b-day girl was delighted.

On my 21st the boss did the collection for me even though I told her not to but all my freinds kept their monney 'cause i told them they should bring food to party instead. No pressies allowed.

laura2481

This happened to me last year- I had just started work, missed the deadline for payday so had a 6 week month and less pay from old place and I got asked to donate money to someones pressie that I hadn't even met yet. I said No but everyone was Ok as the realised I didn't know her.. This year it was her 30th- and I did contribute to that, but even if it had been her 'big birthday' last year I wouldn't give money to someone I didn't know- and people shouldn't pressure people to put in...

CocoLoco_3

Lankykatz wrote: »

weddings especially make me feel miserly - they already get extra time off

georgina_fenwick

No I wouldn't, when it comes to family birthday's we all just give each other a card with £2 in it unless it is one of the big ones (16, 18, 21, 30, 40, 50 etc..) and then it is only £5.

I would have a hard time justifying giving that amount to ANY work colleague, never mind one I don't know.