Oh C*@p

gill_81uk

If your parents do go mad could you suggest that if they want particular guests to come then they can pay for them per head? Same for OH's parents. You shouldn't need to pay for anyone they particularly want there. (unless you want them as well!!)

I'm really pleased to hear that the venue are helping you out.

Ruthie5

Well done you! It is a shame about the honeymoon, but it sounds as though it really had to be done, and you can look forward to a lovely trip at a later date. Nice to hear that the venue is being so helpful too. I can see why you would want tp stick with them. I agree about your mum & dad's guests. It is your day< you are paying etc. perhaps you could say to them that you would have loved to have had auntie flo there, but you now just cant afford to have as big a do as youd originally hoped. im sure they'll understand. We arent inviting any aunts/uncles etc to our wedding.

aimee21j

lindaatno9 wrote: »

I'd just like to add if there is anything I can help with then I'd be happy to. Sounds like you have everything kind of sorted but anything else, well, you know. xx

I'll second this.

Floss

sexki11en wrote: »

.......We have to go home tonight and sit down with the guest list and shave a lot off the day do which will be hard. Only 19 out of the 95 are our friends - the rest are family or close family friends, and my parents particularly will go mad, but it's all we can do.......

Loads of great things done already

As others have said, when you have been up front with them & told them what you have already done to reduce your costs, they may well help you out by suggesting "great aunty Nellie wouldn't come anyway & cousin Fred didn't invite you to his wedding so he is off the list" type things.....

However, do not be surprised if they expect you to lose your friends - please stand your ground. It is YOUR day, not theirs. If they aren't paying then they cannot expect any real input into the guest list in this situation.

:grouphug: Hope it goes well

Floss xx

nat82

Well done! I agree with everyone about your guests and parents. Please don't let them guilt trip you into inviting people that they want there. You've had to make sacrifices therefore don't let them be in vain and have to spend your day thinking "I wish my good friends Betty and Barney were here instead of mum and dads friends Wilma and Fred" (for want of better names!!!!). You never know, you may find that you have enough left over to get a last minute holiday! This is what we're hoping for!

red_bertie

If you were my daughter/son, I would be very proud of you for taking such a respnsible attitude.

Keep your friends, ditch the relatives and friends of both parents, don't be 'guilted' intto inviting them.

If needs be, decide on a number [say 4] that each of the parents can invite. It''s your/your partner's day they had theirs xx years ago.

ema_o

I'm glad to hear you are getting it all sorted, it is great that the venue are being so helpful. Shame about the honeymoon but I agree with everyone that it was the right decision and you could have a cheaper holiday this year then save for your dream holiday another year.

I know it is small in comparison but £400 for BM dresses sounds a lot (unless you have loads of bridesmaids). I was BM for a friend and my dress was £55 from M&S autograph range. All 3 of us BMs helped find the dress, the bride told us 3 colours she was happy with and a budget of up ot £70 and the dresses were perfect, so nice that I am wearing mine to another wedding later this year.
Think this plan worked really well - all BMs were happy, bride was happy and it gave us the job of finding dresses rather than her (although she had final say if she didn't like what we picked).

bravobeastie

Have you tried ebay for the bridesmaids dresses? I got 2 beautiful dusky pink 2 piece dresses for my adult bridesmaids and they only cost £5 each, after cleaning and alterations they cost me about £30 each.

Accessories too, their tiaras cost about £10 for the 2.

Don't worry about the honeymoon, there's plenty of time for all that,

Let us know what sizes/colours/styles you're after and we could always have a nosy about for you!

sexki11en

ema_o wrote: »

I'm glad to hear you are getting it all sorted, it is great that the venue are being so helpful. Shame about the honeymoon but I agree with everyone that it was the right decision and you could have a cheaper holiday this year then save for your dream holiday another year.

I know it is small in comparison but £400 for BM dresses sounds a lot (unless you have loads of bridesmaids). I was BM for a friend and my dress was £55 from M&S autograph range. All 3 of us BMs helped find the dress, the bride told us 3 colours she was happy with and a budget of up ot £70 and the dresses were perfect, so nice that I am wearing mine to another wedding later this year.
Think this plan worked really well - all BMs were happy, bride was happy and it gave us the job of finding dresses rather than her (although she had final say if she didn't like what we picked).

Hi Ema,

I've just realised what a typo I made!!! It's £200 not £400 :oI have 4 BM's and the dresses are £50 each from Landy. I've looked and looked and I can't see any cheaper anywhere.

I've got a network of friends over the country looking in Primark for the dresses that xJayJayx posted about, but none of my local Primarks stock them and the head office couldn't tell me which stores have them either.

We're basically looking for red dresses, satin if possible and knee length. None of the BM's are skinny minnies so they need to be flattering (i'm not one of these awful brides who wants to make the BM's look silly lol)

SK x

SmlSave

I'm so happy for you that the venue is being accommodating!

Let us know how is goes with the family.