Oh C*@p

floss2

sexki11en wrote: »

You guys are great

The venue is the main issue tbh. We really did scale down as much as we could with everything else. The cars are friends driving us, the cake is cheaper than an M&S one, flowers are being done by a friend as were the invites. We're not doing favours, the photographer is only £650 I'm sure you can get a better price than that .

I've bought my dress (sample sale) and the flowergirl dresses. Still have to buy the BM dresses and even at Landy, they're coming in at nearly £300 (4 BM's) Will your adult BM's pay for their dresses if they get to keep them and you buy shoes & accessories? We've paid half the suit hire so have another £200 to pay on that. £7,000 is what's currently outstanding on the venue tho at the moment. You really need to speak to them to see if they will accomodate your change of circumstances

The venue is £60 a head (and that's with a reduction of 20% for a Sunday) It's our dream venue and I guess we could cancel but we'd loose £500 and the chance of finding a new venue with 4 months to go could be tricky, plus some guests have already booked non refundable rooms. I know you don't want to do this but have you actually tried?

We're at the venue tonight for our menu tasting so i'll see if they will reduce the min numbers but we've sent save the dates out already so it'll be difficult to reduce numbers without offending anyone. I could also see if the second room is free at the venue that day. That means severely chopping the numbers but needs must I guess. It's a great start - they may be scared you will cancel altogether if you make enquiries about this and that should help get the prices down a bit

If we book a cheaper honeymoon, we could save a lot. The balance on that is still £3,250 although we are having a honeymoon guest list. If we booked somewhere else, we would only loose the £150 deposit. I feel like a spoilt child now, but I was SO looking forward to a *real* holiday instead of budget - just once. Cancel this and wait & see what you can get with your wedding presents

I could just cry, this time last year, we could afford the wedding of our dreams, now it looks like it's out of reach for us. It could be worse - you could have lost your job

SK x

What would you do if you had actually lost your job? Would you have cancelled or tried to borrow the money to have the wedding of your dreams?

Sometimes we have to "cut our coat according to the cloth", and make what we have stretch so we can do what we want, rather than allowing our dreams to rule our heads - and finances.

val_84

Hi,

Not sure if it is much use but it might be worth saying your thinking of cancelling the whole thing due to money. My Oh and I provisionally booked a place when we first started looking and found somewhere else.

When we told the other place we couldnt afford them they sent us a letter to say they would reduce the cost of the food, give us the ceremony room for free, throw in the late bar licence and also provide the DJ free.

A lot of places are suffering the crunch themselves so they are more likely to keep the business if they can

SmlSave

Hi sexki11en, sorry things aren't going well.

Its horrible that you've set your heart on your day and honeymoon and its not going to plan.

If you end up borrowing to cover the costs of your wedding how long would it take you to pay it back realistically?

Personally if its under a year then I would think about it but if its over then I wouldn't.

Have you thought what's more important to you? The venue or the holiday?

Tigerlilley1980

I agree with the posts about the honeymoon. Why not book a cheaper one and save your vouchers for when you have saved the money for it. Even a coupl of nights in a swish hotel in this country will be fab, then you have your fantastic honeymoon to look forward to. We aren't having a honeymoon until next year as we are going to save for it, as we just can't afford it although we are looking forward to a couple of nights in the bridal suite at our venue. How did you get on with the flowers? I have made both my bridesmaids posies for £8 and all my buttonholes for under £1 each, Tiger x

rinroo

I haven't got any advice as such, other than if you take out a loan or put it all onto a credit card, just to have the wedding of your dreams then you may well regret it or, leave yourselves in an even worse financial situation futher down the line. The economic crisis isnt set to ease for a long while so i would have a serious think about the rest of the year and beyond and where you would be if you borrowed £11k just to make your dreams a reality.

I dreamed of a fairy tale wedding when i was younger but in reality with 2 children and h2b pestering for a 3rd and being made redundant we have to settle with what we have got. I was given a budget (unrealistic) of £2k this has gone up to £3,400 but were estimating it to come in at £4,200 so h2b is chasing all the overtime to fund it. I personally would not borrow to fund my wedding as i wouldnt want to be in debt over it. Live within your immediate means.

I really hope you manage to sort something out, could you not transfer your holiday to next year or put it off a few months, so you dont lose your deposit? just so you can really think about being able to afford to go.

Have you triple checked your budget to see if you can shave any more £s off anything else

xJayJayx

sexki11en wrote: »

If we book a cheaper honeymoon, we could save a lot. The balance on that is still £3,250 although we are having a honeymoon guest list. If we booked somewhere else, we would only loose the £150 deposit. I feel like a spoilt child now, but I was SO looking forward to a *real* holiday instead of budget - just once.

Thats a hell of a lot of money for a honeymoon!
At the moment they have great last minute deals with first choice to places like jamaica and dominican republic for as little as £500pp with 4 weeks til the flights and they have this every month. I appreciate you probably won't want to look around with hardly any time til the wedding for honeymoons but that could cut your honeymoon by £2,250.

Also IMO i would change venue, i know its your dream venue but in this climate debt is a huuuuuge no, no. No one is secure in this financial state right now so £7000 with no security? I wouldn't hun.
Don't cancel the venue, look around for halls and other places to have your wedding/reception (close to original venue if poss) and if you find somewhere cheaper then you can cancel and you will save a hell of a lot of money. All it takes is maybe a few phonecalls to correct the venue and voila! Done!

chardonnay_2

sexki11en, list everything you've still to pay for, plus any deposits already paid and i'm sure we'll all try and find links / cheaper alternatives for you.

be honest with your bridal party, either cut the numbers of bridesmaids or tell them you can't afford to buy their dresses etc anymore and ask them to pay for their own, same with groomsmen. at the end of the day if they were attending as a guest they would buy a new outfit.

weeclick

so sorry to hear about all your troubles! I work in the wedding industry as a photographer (I own my own business) and I know just how stressful weddings can be especially with the money crisis at the minute.

The first thing you need to do is contact the venue. Sit with your OH and agree on a new budget for the venue, tell the venue this is all you can afford and see what they will offer at your new suggested price. Explain the situation your in and tell them youve already begun at looking at different venues that are willing to accommodate your new budget, dont forget everyone needs every sale they can get these days so if they think you are going to go elsewhere they will take you more seriously and hopefully cut you a deal. They need the final balance of a few grand rather than settling for the few hundred pound deposit and letting you walk away!

Ask your bridesmaids to pay for their dresses or contribute what they can towards them, theyre your friends so if they understand the situation youre in Im sure they will do their best to help. After the wedding sell the dresses in a paper or on ebay try and get as much back as you can - put the extra money you get for them towards the honeymoon!

Get a cheaper honeymoon for now, any getaway would be better than nothing right now, and you need to relax after the wedding - not stress about how much debt your in or how much its cost you! Go somewhere nice, but cheap - agree with your OH that you start saving up towards this holiday of your dreams when you get any spare cash - at least then youll have had a honeymoon and the holiday of your dreams, does it matter that it was a yr or 2 later than expected?

As a photographer I start my wedding packages from £395 and this is really to accommodate people that cant afford a huge budget - you get everything though and we dont compromise on that - you get a full days coverage, a free online album, and 20 print outs or a photobook. What deposit did you give your photographer and what was the terms of your contract? We offer a refund depending on circumstances and if your photographer wont accomodate your situation and your new budget see if you can get your desposit back! Start looking elsewhere - our packages are almost half of what youve been charged so I know theres cheaper out there!!

Most importantly though try not to stress so much, you dont want to look back at this time of your life with saddness because of the stress you put yourself through, and remember your getting married to the person you love, thats what most important, everything else is just a "stuff" your partner is what really matters - and these trying times will only bring you closer and make you stronger!

chardonnay_2

what's more important to you the venue for the reception or the honeymoon? even the most basic venue can be made to look fantastic. remember this is only one day and a lot of money to spend.

if you do decide to use the smaller room in the venue, start reducing numbers by uninviting any guests you invited to keep the peace, haven't seen or kept in contact with for years and any plus ones you don't know.

boost your income by getting second jobs (pubs / mcdonalds etc), mystery shopping, do surveys. declutter and sell your unwanted items on ebay and do car boots.

weeclick

sexki11en wrote: »

Actually, my florist cancelled a few days ago (to go on holiday to Mexico :rolleyes: lol) and that was going to cost £250 just for my bouquet, 4 BM bouquets and buttonholes. I'll have a look at that link now. Thank you

SK x

I made the flowers for my sisters wedding, went to tescos and got a few nice bunches of roses from "tecos finest" section - cost me about £15 at most for hers, got some nice red ribbon from a local craft shop which cost about £1.60 and the flowers turned out really well Ive actually got photos of them on my photography website! That might help if your good at flower arrangements or know anyone creative?