Oh C*@p

sexki11en

We sat down with the budget last night and we're in over our heads.

When we booked the wedding last year, money was fine. I have a commission based job and the money was great (and had been for 3 years). Fast forward a year and i'm now on basic because of the recession (I bought in less than a grand this month after tax) I work in recruitment, which has obviously been hit hard. I'm now clearing about £1,500 a month less than had been for at least 2 years. :eek: We put savings away but when my wages tailed off, this stopped.

Our venue has a minimum numbers policy (80 - we negotiated it from 90) for the room we've booked into and although we've cut out unecessary things e.g buffet in the evening - if you include the honeymoon (to Mexico - but thats another story lol) we're still £11,000 short.

We do have £8,000 available on a credit card (much as i'm loathe to do it) and our gift list is holiday vouchers, but with only 3 more paydays to go, I feel sick.

We *could* borrow from the bank but that's gonna stretch us to the limit (if not beyond) on monthly repayments.

It's unlikely anyone can offer us any advice, I just wanted to get it off my chest really. What is supposed to be the happiest day of our lives is turning into a complete nightmare. We couldn't have picked a worse year to get married! Is anyone else in a similar boat?

SK x

floss2

Can I ask what savings you already have if you are £11k short? Were your savings on track before your income dropped? And can I assum that you have not reduced your outgoings to maintain those savings plans while your income has dropped?

sexki11en

floss2 wrote: »

Can I ask what savings you already have if you are £11k short? Were your savings on track before your income dropped? And can I assum that you have not reduced your outgoings to maintain those savings plans while your income has dropped?

Hey,

We didn't have massive savings unfortunately, we only started saving when we set the date. We had £3000 but that's nearly all gone now with deposits etc. We can't reduce our outgoings any more than we have sadly, this was something we already did before the money dropped to account for the wedding. My wages started dropping in August last year and we were hoping it would pick up but obviously it hasn't.

Had my wages kept the same (as they had been over the previous years), we could have put more into saving but as it is, now we are barely covering the monthly outgoings before considering anything else.

I'm a regular on the OS board, we very rarely go out, my OH lift shares to cut petrol costs and we do everything we can to keep the bills down. I've just reduced my mobile plan to a basic one and we ut Sky right down to the bare minimum as we've just reached the end of our first year.

It sounds like we started out over our head, but really we didn't. This damn recession has hit us hard, more than halfing my monthly income and we just didn't see it coming in January last year when we booked everything.

I know we're luckier than most at this present time in that it's only the wedding that's been affected for us and not other areas of our lives (so far) so I guess I should just suck it up and stop moaning lol

SK

MsChazzer

Hmm, that's a lot of money, have you paid a lot of deposits? Would you lose a lot of money if you cancelled your venue and went somewhere else, like hiring a village hall and finding cheaper caterers? I know that seems drastic but in this climate you don't really want to be taking on more debt.

Is there anything else you can scale back on - taxis instead of posh cars, no favours etc? Remember these things don't make it the happiest day of your life, the wedding industry just wants you to spend more money (but you probably know that anyway...). I'd also be inclined to go somewhere cheaper for honeymoon (swine flu or not!).

I hope you get something sorted, sounds like you are in a really difficult position.

Tigerlilley1980

Hi there, I'm not realy sure what advice to offer apart from maybe changing te venue and finding everything else as cheaply as possible. Things like wedding cars, do you have a friend with a nice car you can use? Have you ordered your flowers why not buy silk and try making them yourself or try sarahsflowers.co.uk, they are supposed to be fab. What else have you booked and paid deposits on? As it's hard to understand where you can cut down without knowing what is paid for. Have you ordered a cake you could try M and S or make a cupcake one yourself. Tiger xx

mookybargirl

So sorry things have turned out so hard for you. Have you rang the venue to ask if they can reduce the min. numbers? They can only say no...... Let them know that you're considering dropping the evening (lost money on the bar for them, people staying etc) or even cancelling so that they will do what they can for you.

Let us know what's planned for the wedding day itself, and we might be able to suggest how to alter the day to save some cash. A few heads might be better than one.

sexki11en

You guys are great

The venue is the main issue tbh. We really did scale down as much as we could with everything else. The cars are friends driving us, the cake is cheaper than an M&S one, flowers are being done by a friend as were the invites. We're not doing favours, the photographer is only £650.

I've bought my dress (sample sale) and the flowergirl dresses (TK Maxx at £17 each). Still have to buy the BM dresses and even at Landy, they're coming in at nearly £300 (4 BM's) We've paid half the suit hire so have another £200 to pay on that. £7,000 is what's currently outstanding on the venue tho at the moment.

The venue is £68 a head (and that's with a reduction of 20% for a Sunday) It's our dream venue and I guess we could cancel but we'd loose £500 and the chance of finding a new venue with 4 months to go could be tricky, plus some guests have already booked non refundable rooms.

We're at the venue tonight for our menu tasting so i'll see if they will reduce the min numbers but we've sent save the dates out already so it'll be difficult to reduce numbers without offending anyone. I could also see if the second room is free at the venue that day. That means severely chopping the numbers but needs must I guess.

If we book a cheaper honeymoon, we could save a lot. The balance on that is still £3,250 although we are having a honeymoon guest list. If we booked somewhere else, we would only loose the £150 deposit. I feel like a spoilt child now, but I was SO looking forward to a *real* holiday instead of budget - just once.

I could just cry, this time last year, we could afford the wedding of our dreams, now it looks like it's out of reach for us.

SK x

sexki11en

Tigerlilley1980 wrote: »

Have you ordered your flowers why not buy silk and try making them yourself or try sarahsflowers.co.uk, they are supposed to be fab.

Actually, my florist cancelled a few days ago (to go on holiday to Mexico :rolleyes: lol) and that was going to cost £250 just for my bouquet, 4 BM bouquets and buttonholes. I'll have a look at that link now. Thank you

SK x

blonde36er

sexki11en wrote: »

You guys are great

If we book a cheaper honeymoon, we could save a lot. The balance on that is still £3,250 although we are having a honeymoon guest list. If we booked somewhere else, we would only loose the £150 deposit. I feel like a spoilt child now, but I was SO looking forward to a *real* holiday instead of budget - just once.

I could just cry, this time last year, we could afford the wedding of our dreams, now it looks like it's out of reach for us.

SK x

I think that changing honeymoon would be a very good idea, even though it's not what you want to do. Once you're away in the sun with your shiny new husband hanging off your arm, it won't matter where you are. Anyway, honeymooners aren't meant to see much of the outside world anyway

And then when things pick up you can take yourselves somewhere magical for a second honeymoon and have the holiday you've always dreamed of, without being in debt up to your eyeballs and having to scrimp every last penny for the first few years of your married life x

nat82

Could you possibly hold off going on honeymoon until things are better financially for you? We've had to forget about going on a honeymoon as we're on a real budget.

I'd have a look around for alternative venues as well, just so you can weigh up the costs. If your getting married on a Sunday then you might find that there are still places out there with your date available. I know you said it was your dream venue but do you really want to be paying for it for years to come? If they can't reduce the numbers I'd tell them that you may have to cancel the whole thing and go somewhere else, they might re-think their answer then!

MsChazzer

What the above 2 posts said about your honeymoon, have a simple cheap one now and save those vouchers for later on, it will be something to look forward to.

I know your venue is your dream one but £60 a head is a lot and I think you could do it cheaper even taking into the lost deposit, you may have to think out of the box a bit. Our venue is a hall belonging to an arts organisation, they just rent it out for extra money and aren't geared up for weddings, we've had to do a lot ourselves (although I've been recommending them to people and they are getting more wedding bookings so this may change!!). Outside caterers will often take care of things like linen and crockery etc for you.

I wonder if your venue would offer you a better deal if you do tell them you are going to cancel? You would have to really be cancelling rather than just pretending, in this climate they may be desparate to hold onto bookings. I doubt it would be a significant reduction but may be a reduction all the same. Just make sure you do have an alternative venue in case they don't though.