Re: Really Upset - Need Help - Feel Conned

AMILLIONDOLLARS · 29 April 2009 at 2:47PM

Maybe in a situation like this its best to have separate solicitors! I wouldn't want to be piggy in the middle on this one!!!

AMD

gismo1554 · 29 April 2009 at 2:54PM

I agree with everyone else! Stay calm and talk to your other half and explain that you aren't comfortable with this. What ever he thinks you want it as was agreed. If he isn't just after you for the money (which I'm sure he wont be) then he should understand that you need some security and want it signed the way that was agreed before you handed over the money. Don't concentrate too much on the "why has this suddenly changed" try to keep it focused on the "this is why I think we should leave it alone" that way he can't turn round and say you're being awkward just because your solicitor says his is wrong. I personally wouldn't feel happy giving all the control to my other half when we share a property! You shouldn't either and he should understand that. This is for your future security incase things go wrong not to stop him from doing things. Any one who loves you should be able to see that and accept it.

toothe · 29 April 2009 at 2:58PM

im about to sign a delceration of trust but for a smaller ammount. The sol drew it up and me and my GF have signed it. no problem, she said you can take it to be verified by another sol if you wish.

Why has your BF not just said ok. is he after your money?
how long you been togther it sounds strange to speak to sum1 though a sol

newbie2009 · 29 April 2009 at 3:02PM

we have a solicitor each as im not on the mortgage and HIS solicitor said it would be conflict of intrest so i had to have one to act on my behalf??!

starting to regret the WHOLE thing!!!

Gwhiz · 29 April 2009 at 3:06PM

newbie2009 wrote: »

we have a solicitor each as im not on the mortgage and HIS solicitor said it would be conflict of intrest so i had to have one to act on my behalf??!

starting to regret the WHOLE thing!!!

I would absolutely agree with that - you need someone to look after your interests.

Hate to say it.. but I would bet money that your relationship is not going to last if it's getting to using solicitors to communicate at this early stage. That's normally what happens when a divorce gets messy!

AMILLIONDOLLARS · 29 April 2009 at 3:11PM

newbie2009 wrote: »

we have a solicitor each as im not on the mortgage and HIS solicitor said it would be conflict of intrest so i had to have one to act on my behalf??!

Seems the most sensible thing he's said so far, so why the sudden change? he of all people should KNOW that the original draft is in your best interest, why would he want you to sign away your rights

Speak with your solicitors about the implications that's why you're paying him, failing that an appointment down at the Citizen Advice for the laymans understanding would be in order.

AMD

carefullycautious · 29 April 2009 at 3:19PM

Oh dear, Oh dear, Oh dear

Tozer · 29 April 2009 at 3:26PM

Gwhiz wrote: »

I

Hate to say it.. but I would bet money that your relationship is not going to last if it's getting to using solicitors to communicate at this early stage. That's normally what happens when a divorce gets messy!

To be fair to the solicitors, there is a conflict of interest here as the parties' interests are not equal. I wouldn't act for both parties here.

I can see that there could be some increased flexibility in permitting remortgaging without consent. That said, it is in your interests to maintain the position that was agreed.

Simply say no and if your partner pursues the point then ask what the concern actually is.

SelenaLouise · 29 April 2009 at 3:56PM

Tozer wrote: »

To be fair to the solicitors, there is a conflict of interest here as the parties' interests are not equal. I wouldn't act for both parties here.

I can see that there could be some increased flexibility in permitting remortgaging without consent. That said, it is in your interests to maintain the position that was agreed.

Simply say no and if your partner pursues the point then ask what the concern actually is.

Agree with this

silvercar · 29 April 2009 at 4:12PM

If you have a second charge ont he property, if he wanted to remortgage you would need to agree a "deed of postponement", so I don't think he could change mortgaes without your agreement in any event.