MONEY MORAL DILEMMA. Should Peggy pay back some of Archie's fortune?

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  • meher
    meher Posts: 15,910 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
    We can easily trot out live by the sword die by the sword but in my mind I believe it is such instances that reveal the person that we are or that we aren't, how we act would define our destiny too.

    Peggy needn't give anything but I don't think I'd ever understand or relate with how you are an utter failure as a partner and then go on to live shamelessly on someone elses wealth.
  • no no no no no nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo definately no
  • Velvet_Darkness
    Velvet_Darkness Posts: 9 Forumite
    edited 9 April 2009 at 1:38AM
    Firstly, it doesn't say that she was the utter failure as a partner now living shamelessly on the wealth of another. Even the best of marriages can fail and it takes two to ruin a marriage.

    Secondly, we're all assuming she has any of the money left.
    What if she bought a house with it? Would she now be expected to sell her home to bail him out?
    This is a simple case of two people who had a connection but are now leading seperate lives. I don't think he can rely on the pity vote here.
    He needs to be a man and sort out his own mess.
  • expat_mike
    expat_mike Posts: 50 Forumite
    Anyone remembering the case of some wives who divorced their footballer husbands will remember that despite objection, the family court judges took into account future earnings in the settlement. As this is an established point in divorce law (although I disagree with it) it should be the case that if circumstances change significantly, a former partner should be able to have the settlement re-assessed. When a settlement is in cash, there's no issue as you each got your share and its a done deal. But when assets are not fixed like the value of shares, a business or future earnings you shouldn't set in concrete the settlement figure and Peggy should give up some of the cash she received. This can also be true of ex partners today where one has a civil service pension and the other had a private pension that's been decimated. The divorce settlement should also be adjusted at maturity time to reflect the change in values. :mad:
  • elbe
    elbe Posts: 83 Forumite
    Woa, Meher, what's this about failed marriages having failed characters. What makes you so righteous?
  • There are definitely 2 slants to this dilemma, a moral one and a legal one. I'm assuming since this is the MMD forum we should ignore the legal aspect (not least because the precedent set by this case would even more complicate what is already an extremely painful and traumatic experience for a married couple in divorice)...
    Sadly without details or the circumstances of the divorice and any current relationship between the pair it is difficult to pass judgement on the moral aspect. My view would be that if she did share some of her divorce settlement it would be a display of extraordinary generosity, and if I were in his position I certainly wouldn't expect anything, although I might ask for help!
  • moulin_2
    moulin_2 Posts: 7 Forumite
    NO WAY - if share/property prices had suddenly increased she wouldn't have got any more from him. Same applies.
  • englishmac
    englishmac Posts: 137 Forumite
    meher wrote: »
    We can easily trot out live by the sword die by the sword but in my mind I believe it is such instances that reveal the person that we are or that we aren't, how we act would define our destiny too.

    Peggy needn't give anything but I don't think I'd ever understand or relate with how you are an utter failure as a partner and then go on to live shamelessly on someone elses wealth.

    No info is provided regarding the status of the marriage prior to the divorce and therefore there is no jusitification for regarding Peggy as 1. an utter failure as a partner or going on to 2. live shamelessly on someone elses wealth.

    1. If the husband was thrice married before marrying Peggy most people would hesitate to blame Peggy for the breakdown of the marriage. But the fact is no one knows but the two of them what led to divorce.

    2. Most people get very hung up when they hear a 'housewife' has received a large divorce payout from their husband but most husbands couldn't sort out the domestic side of life at the same time as managing the demands of a business. Money/assets are not 'someone elses wealth' - the divorce settlement decided the allocation of assets. Also, Peggy may well have been an unpaid working partner - very likely if the business was small-medium size at the time.

    Luck and good management have led to each individual's current circumstances. There is no legal obligation for Peggy to help her ex - and shouldn't be; the divorce has resolved that. If she would like to, or feels obliged to, that is entirely up to her. The financial future of any children is unlikely to be secured by Peggy donating good money to follow bad, particularly in the current economic climate.
    Cheap and cheerful. Preferably free. :T LBM - more a gradual rude awakening.
    DFD where the light is at the end of this very long tunnel - there, see it? Its getting brighter!! :o

    DFW Nerd Club Member no. 946. Proud To Be Dealing With My Debts. :D
  • liz_ferla
    liz_ferla Posts: 19 Forumite
    Yeh, right.................................
    Val :)
  • bibi_neko
    bibi_neko Posts: 70 Forumite
    Ultimately it is her decision to make as it is her money given there and then. But the answer would be "no", she is not obliged to give him anything.
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