Support for people with Depression

rubytuesday

I posted this in the Arms but it didn't take off! I hope you like it here and it brings a smile to your face! x
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXI80TqAMQQ

loveandlight

Which section of this board do I post a problem to do with fighting off depression. I want to make sure I post it in the correct section.

Thanks

Avoriaz

Here is probably the best place.

Would you like to summarise your situation and see if anyone can help.

fluffnutter

What's up loveandlight? I'm no stranger to the black dog.

amistupid

Here's a thread where some say it's good to talk over such matters on here and others disagree.

Mental Health Problems - start a thread instead of getting professional help! Why?

At least you'll get a general idea of people's opinions and won't feel alone.

loveandlight

Thanks guys. I used to suffer from depression for so many years I thought it was normal to feel that way. However when i reached my mid thirties I had a nervous breakdown and spent four months off work. I resigned from work and went to stay with my mum. I couldn't even write my name and spent the first three months in my nightclothes all day long but I didn't care because I was with my mum and that was all I felt I needed at the time. My mum was so fantastic and it was her love that got me well again. I also had some hypnotherapy which worked brilliantly and I've never really suffered from it seriously since. If I do I can usually pull myself out of it again.

This time I feel its different because the past month has not been a good one. My brother killed himself but thanks to the skill of the paramedics they broke his door down and got to him in time to bring him back to life again. He was admitted to hospital but ran away twice and on one of those occaisions the police had to go looking for him. A whole week was spent not knowing whether he was dead or alive and every phone call I got I expected to be the one to tell me he had indeed killed himself. He appears to be on the mend again now but only time will tell.

A few days ago I got a call from my sister to say she has just been diagnosed with cancer and has to go into hospital shortly. Apart from the shock of that it also brought back what happened to me about five years ago. I was told I had breast cancer and didn't have long left to live. I went in to hospital for a lumpectomy and was told it wasn't cancer after all. My son was only 5 at the time so luckily I didn't have to tell him anything about it.

My problem now is I keep getting waves of deep depression coming over me constantly throughout the day and night. I have to work as I am self employed and if I don't work I don't get paid. I'm lucky in that I work from home although lately some travelling is involved as well. I am out this afternoon but will check this thread again later.

I'm wondering what can I do to help myself? I don't know what to do about these waves of depression that keep coming over me. They are quite deep waves.

My mum died a few years ago so I can't go to her anymore (well not physically anyway) and I have a child now as well.

I am married but I'm the one he comes to for emotional support as he is a worry wart and its usually me giving him positive support.

I would really appreciate tips on how I can help myself.

amistupid

You poor soul my heart goes out to you. Have you seen your doctor?

aliadds

loveandlight wrote: »

Thanks guys. I used to suffer from depression for so many years I thought it was normal to feel that way. However when i reached my mid thirties I had a nervous breakdown and spent four months off work. I resigned from work and went to stay with my mum. I couldn't even write my name and spent the first three months in my nightclothes all day long but I didn't care because I was with my mum and that was all I felt I needed at the time. My mum was so fantastic and it was her love that got me well again. I also had some hypnotherapy which worked brilliantly and I've never really suffered from it seriously since. If I do I can usually pull myself out of it again.

This time I feel its different because the past month has not been a good one. My brother killed himself but thanks to the skill of the paramedics they broke his door down and got to him in time to bring him back to life again. He was admitted to hospital but ran away twice and on one of those occaisions the police had to go looking for him. A whole week was spent not knowing whether he was dead or alive and every phone call I got I expected to be the one to tell me he had indeed killed himself. He appears to be on the mend again now but only time will tell.

A few days ago I got a call from my sister to say she has just been diagnosed with cancer and has to go into hospital shortly. Apart from the shock of that it also brought back what happened to me about five years ago. I was told I had breast cancer and didn't have long left to live. I went in to hospital for a lumpectomy and was told it wasn't cancer after all. My son was only 5 at the time so luckily I didn't have to tell him anything about it.

My problem now is I keep getting waves of deep depression coming over me constantly throughout the day and night. I have to work as I am self employed and if I don't work I don't get paid. I'm lucky in that I work from home although lately some travelling is involved as well. I am out this afternoon but will check this thread again later.

I'm wondering what can I do to help myself? I don't know what to do about these waves of depression that keep coming over me. They are quite deep waves.

My mum died a few years ago so I can't go to her anymore (well not physically anyway) and I have a child now as well.

I am married but I'm the one he comes to for emotional support as he is a worry wart and its usually me giving him positive support.

I would really appreciate tips on how I can help myself.

Pretty inadequate really, but I wanted to send you a hug in any case!:A:grouphug::kisses3:
I've been where you are! My best advice is to speak to your GP, and hopefully you have one or more good friends that you can unburden yourself to! I always found the sharing of troubles a great help! If you need to speak further, please feel free to PM me!:) xx

amistupid

aliadds wrote: »

Pretty inadequate really, but I wanted to send you a hug in any case!:A:grouphug::kisses3:
I've been where you are! My best advice is to speak to your GP, and hopefully you have one or more good friends that you can unburden yourself to! I always found the sharing of troubles a great help! If you need to speak further, please feel free to PM me!:) xx

Agreed, I think the first step must be to see your GP, he can then assess what type of depression you are suffering from and will suggest courses of treatment available to you.

Avoriaz

Below is something I wrote on another forum a few years ago.

Have a read through it and see if there is anything you can identify with. We are all individuals and your situation is probably very different to mine.

Try and focus on the knowledge that you will feel better one day. Maybe not tomorrow or next week, or even next month, but one day you will feel better. I can promise you that.

Ring the Samaritans. I found it very helpful to talk to them. In fact I have recently applied to be a volunteer with them.

Try and talk to your GP and maybe get referred to your local mental health services. There is medication that can be very effective.

Whatever you do don’t blame yourself and don’t feel or be ashamed. Having depression is a medical condition just like diabetes, cancer or a broken leg.

You can tell me a bit about yourself and your situation if you think that might help, but if you prefer not to that is fine.

Take care and respond if and when you feel up to it.

Take care

Avoriaz

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

written in early 2006.


I have experienced severe depression all my life, or "Uni Polar Affective Disorder" as it is properly called. It is in my case a combination of childhood experiences and inherited genes that are the main causes. I have had two mind numbingly appalling and horrific total breakdowns where I simply ceased to function as a person for months on end. I was locked in an appalling prison of my own mind and could see no escape. Complete, utter and total sadness, fear and hopelessness overwhelmed me. I wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. I wanted to kill myself but lacked the courage. I wanted to scream and shout at the world, at my friends, even at my dear and loving wife. I could not sleep, I could not rest, I could not relax, and I could not eat. I no longer wanted to drink wine or beer. I lost 3 stones in weight, my normally fit muscles lost all tone and I looked like more like a concentration camp victim than anything else. I could not listen to my beloved music. I stopped reading books.

I am normally an outgoing and popular life and soul of the party guy, but I could not even speak to anyone. I just wanted to stay in bed and hide from the world. I was getting good help from a very understanding GP, but the rest of the mental health system totally and utterly failed me. I was diagnosed as a critically urgent and high-risk case and put on a waiting list for treatment. The estimate was not 8 months, it was two years.

But throughout it all I had the undying and unswerving support of my beloved wife, who tried to understand and who stuck by me. She also suffered appallingly but she stayed at my side from start to finish.

And throughout it all, there was always that glimmer, that tiny light, that flickering candle of hope at the end of a very long tunnel, that one day, somehow, the misery and hell would pass. One day I would wake up and smile, get dressed in clean and pressed clothes, smile at and cuddle my wife, tickle the cats and look forward to the day. One day I would be able to walk in the rain, or feel the sun on my face and once again think, “Life is good” I would be able to remove “The Samaritans” number from my friends and family list. Yes, I called them often. They are more saints in that organisation than the Vatican will ever know. A quiet, gentle and understanding voice that listens but does not criticise or judge; that advises and suggests and guides; that recognises and feels and understands your pain. A voice that cares.

I get depressed, just like everyone else does at life’s problems and frustrations. That is normal. But to compare being depressed with depression is to compare a sharp and painful knock on the knee with a broken, twisted and shredded leg that has been caught in a chain saw.

Exercise does help with preventing depression and it lifts low spirits better than any pill. But it is just one of many things that sufferers and non-sufferers alike should do. Regular exercise, good diet, and sensible living are all good things.

SSRI and other medication certainly do also help for some, but it also has its dangers and side effects. Therapy can also help, but if you do not have private medical, insurance, it is difficult to get, and virtually unavailable where I live.

I apologise for my lengthy post. I have lots more to say but I will stop now and allow others to contribute. I will just close by saying.

“Never ever ever give up hope, it ALWAYS gets better.”


PS: If you would like someone to talk to on the phone I will gladly give you my telephone number via a private message. You may be better chatting to a close friend or relative who knows you well rather than a forum stranger but I would be pleased to talk to you and see if I can help in any way.