Single and in Debt Part II

skint_spice

gwen80 wrote: »

Well, possibly, but at this rate, I'll have no shoes on my feet and the only clothing I'll have is scarves!

that's a look that most men would probably prefer:D! won't get you too many female friends though!

gwen80

skint_spice wrote: »

that's a look that most men would probably prefer:D!

Not necessarily!

skint_spice

just saw ad on tv saying match.com has too many women - must not go there then!

SuSu1871

Hi everyone :hello:

Firstly, can I say to those that know me... I'm so sorry I've dropped off radar. :embarasse

To those of you that don't know me, I used to have many a great evening on here chatting to all my fellow single-and-skint buddies, but then I went and met someone, and, well, things kind of changed...

So, it was back on 1 Feb (the day it snowed and the country ground to a halt for a week!) that I met "Complicated Man" and I've had a chuckle reading my posts from that week. We were all about "taking things slowly" and "keeping things to ourselves for a couple of months". Well, it ended up becoming a bit of a whirlwind!!

We've now been together for nearly 6 months and have been living together for nearly 4 months. Things are going really well - it's great! Of course, there have been some compromises - for me it's been an adjustment getting used to having his 9 year old daughter come to stay twice a week, but that's getting a lot easier now (I've almost managed to drown out the sound of kids' TV at the weekends!) and for him, he's learning about budgeting and all things MSE!

I've finally (this week, actually) cleared my debt - hoorah! Just as "CM" starts his 5-year IVA! But, he's fully embraced my life of spreadsheetery and is managing his money so well, that he gives me money each month to put into our savings pot - primarily for buying a house (in 5 years), but it's also paid for a holiday for the two of us in September. Two weeks in the sun :dance:

We haven't moved things on with his divorce yet because we're going to get some advice about custody. Basically, his wife's not fit to look after their daughter. She's an alcoholic, drug addict who lives on her "earnings" of child support, benefits and maintenance. She doesn't do homework or bedtime stories, takes their daughter to the pub most evenings, and the daughter's school report reflects this (her absences have gone up this last term). We need to put a case together to get custody, and we know it's going to be a long drawn-out battle, but it's worth it for the long-term benefit to his daughter.

All of the above has been a bit of an eye-opener for me and has forced me to grow up and accept responsibility for someone other than myself (difficult to do in your late 30s when you've been single most of your adult life), but, well, I do love him, and it's what you do isn't it...

For the most part, though, I'm the happiest I've been since I can remember. We're a solid couple, very open and we both want the same thing - can't ask for much more than that, eh?

Everything else is going well, too. Work's busy, and although being out of the country for about 5 days a month for the past 4 months has been difficult, I'm racking up some airmiles!! Also, after 12 months of neck & shoulder pain, I've finally found the right treatment for me and (touch wood) it's pretty manageable now and doesn't really interfere with my life.

I have to admit, I ummed and ahhed about posting on here in case I came across as some kind of smug git, but I can only hope that you see this for what it is... just me catching up with some friends that I haven't been in touch with for too long.

I hope you're all well, and that you're ticking things off your list of 100 things to do this year / losing those difficult lbs / loving your jobs / getting out there on hot dates with cool guys (and gals).

Big hugs :grouphug:

Lula-Hula

SuSu :j

it's so lovely to hear from you , have often wondered how you are, & in no way do you come across as a smug git:A. You have worked so hard for all that you have achieved & I am absolutely delighted that you have cleared your debt :j& found a man that you love & are happy with :j.

It sounds as though you've had a lot of adjusting to do & still more on the way but with your amazing 'can-do' attitude I have total confidence that you will conquer all obstacles :cool:.

I really wish you all the happiness in the world

Lula
xx

makeup

SuSu1871 wrote: »

I have to admit, I ummed and ahhed about posting on here in case I came across as some kind of smug git, but I can only hope that you see this for what it is... just me catching up with some friends that I haven't been in touch with for too long.

Hey SuSu,

Great to hear from you. I've been wondering recently about how you were getting on. So glad to hear that things have worked out well for you and that you are loving life!

And of course you don't come across as smug!

That does sound like a big battle with CM's ex - but would be so worth it.

I hope that works out well for you both.

And enjoy your holiday!

Take care, Makeup :beer:

Bowski_1011

Has everyone gone off to find themselves a complicated man?

Hope you're all ok...

And Susu, I'm glad everything's working out, and fabulous news about being debt free :j

Today I have bought lots of clothes with vouchers/money I got for my birthday and I'm feeling very pleased with myself as most things were in the sale :A

Hope you all have a great weekend, I'm away camping, I'll be back monday... see you all then. Hopefully with some stories

eco

Hi Everyone, SuSu I don't think your smug, we all deserve a lucky break once in a while.
Bowski well done on the shopping it's allways a good feeling when you get some good stuff in the sales been taller I'm never lucky enough to find trousers with my leg length on the racks.
Going to see Harry Potter with my sis, neice and nephew on Sunday I can't wait, this one will be way better than the rest.
Catch you all soon got work to do, unfortunatley.

Hollyberry

Hola de Bilbao

OH is doing a bit of work, so I thought I´d just say Hi.

Lula - glad you´re ok. Always best to avoid a man who can´t cook a ready made lasagne; it sounds as though he may have problems with washing and cleaning too, and there´s only so much domestic service you want in your future. And having to fight for your own glass of wine is just a cheeky step too far. :eek:

makeup - Sounds lovely in Herefordshire - I love Leominster and Ludlow. Must get down there again soon...

Step Away from the Next sale, eh?

*Potential Smug Paragraph Alert*
We´re having fantastic hols, doing loads of people watching, so much eating that I reckon I can live off the extra for at least another week, trying the odd cocktail or two, plus some wine, in the pool, whirlpool and the spa...in fact, dunno how I´m going to force myself to come home... Fortunately there´s shedloads of walking been done too, or I wouldn´t be able to fit in my clothes.

Glad you are all ok. See you soon. X

Shoe_Gal

SuSu1871 wrote: »

. I have to admit, I ummed and ahhed about posting on here in case I came across as some kind of smug git, but I can only hope that you see this for what it is... just me catching up with some friends that I haven't been in touch with for too long.

I hope you're all well, and that you're ticking things off your list of 100 things to do this year / losing those difficult lbs / loving your jobs / getting out there on hot dates with cool guys (and gals).

Big hugs :grouphug:

Hi SuSu

Lovely to hear from you - and congratulations on your fantastic new life and being debt free

You don't sound smug at all, if anything it's a reminder that good things happen for good people :A

Although I did need your support through the tragedy of the Champions League Final :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: