Am I being over sensitive?

BARGAINHUNTER!

I wondered if I could just get other peoples views on something that has happened today?

My son has just turned 12 and is in his first year at secondary school. Last week he had to hand in a model he had made as part of his geography homework. Apparently, he had 3 weeks to make this, but as per usual, left it until the night before to make! Anyway, he spent nearly 2 hours making this model (unfortunately i didn't see it before he handed it in so have no idea what it looked like but he made it all himself with no help from anyone else).

His geography teacher was not impressed with it, said he had put no effort into it at all and gave him 3 lunchtime detentions as a punishment. Children who didn't hand theirs in were given 5 lunchtime detentions. My son was one of 2 in his class who apparently 'hadn't put any effort in'. My son tells me that some childrens models were very good, and that their parents had helped them make them. I was a bit miffed, as although my son had left it till the last minute, he had spent quite a while making it and had done it all himself. I felt the 3 lunchtime detentions were a bit harsh, but decided to bit my tongue and not say anything and leave him to do his detentions and then the matter would be over and done with.

Unfortunately, my son forgot about his lunchtime detention on Friday. He turned up for his detention today, teacher asked where he was on Friday and he said he was sorry but he forgot about the detention. The teacher has now given him 4 more lunchtime detentions. So in total, had he remembered the Friday detention, he has been given 7 lunchtime detentions! He has been told that if he misses one of these extra 4 he will be given 4 more!! My son has also told me that today, as extra punishment for forgetting the Friday detention he was handed a spoon and told to scrape all the old chewing gum off of the underside of the desks. This has absolutely turned my stomach, my (just) 12 year old son was supposed to be being punished for bringing in a model that the teacher said he hadn't put enough effort into and also for then forgetting one of the resulting detentions!

I tried to phone the school to speak to someone about it, but unfortunately it was 4.30 pm and there was an answerphone on saying school was closed until tomorrow. I was absolutely seeting, and I felt quite ill at the thought of my son under the tables scraping off other pupils chewing gum with a spoon.

What, if anything, do you think I should do about this? Do you think I am being a bit sensitive or do you think I should take this further and if so how? The teacher is my sons geography teacher so only has him twice a week for a lesson. My son has also told me that a girl also forgot her Friday detention and she has been told that she is to scrape the chewing gum off tomorrow (my som will apparently be sharpening pensils).

Sorry for the rant, and I actually feel a bit better now I have put it all down!

Curious_George_2

i can understand there being a harsh punishment for forgetting detention, they must get the 'regulars' trying it on a lot,
but i dont see that your son deserved a punishment at all, he did the homework, albiet at the last moment,
if he had done it a few weeks ago he may not have spent as much as 2 hours on it! last minute panic (while not advised) can be quite productive!

if i was you i would phone the school and have a bit of a moan that your son has been punished because he did the work himself rather than you doing it for him.

Acc72

It sounds like your son goes to a good school, and I am sure he will benefit from this in the future.

I would let the school get on with what they are doing.

They are just preparing him for real life - at work, if I am given a job and Ileave it until the last minute and rush it (resulting in lower quality than was expected) then my boss will say something !

If I forget to go to a meeting or turn up late, then my boss would also say something !

All sounds reasonable to me.

Acc72

Curious_George wrote: »

if i was you i would phone the school and have a bit of a moan that your son has been punished because he did the work himself rather than you doing it for him.

But what will this create - the child may think that every time they get told off in school that they can run to their parent who will complain.

It may be that the homework was of reasonable standard, but the teacher knows that he is capable of much better - and this is their way of promoting greater effort.

reehsetin

sorry but, as a kid i would have been miffed maybe a bit extreme e.g. two days detention instead of 3 but he shouldn't be leaving it to the last min and it obviously showed,
scrapping chewing gum was standard in our detentions (only a few years ago im not that old) again 4 detentions for forgetting one, especially if they didn't realise and he confessed is a but extreme maybe again 2 detentions for forgetting the one, 4 is a bit much that's the point i would argue with the school the rest sounds alright

Minxy_Bella

I'm sorry but as an ex-secondary-school teacher, I think that this punishment is extremely harsh! As a parent, I would be up to that school like a shot to complain about this teacher. Bloody tyrant or what???

Have you ever seen 'The Breakfast Club', where the div teacher keeps on upping the detentions to try and break the kids' spirit? Totally ridiculous and will make any child dig their heels in and rebel. Misguided is not the word! People like that just should not be teaching!!!!

The chewing gum thing has been metered out purely to humiliate your son. I fail to see how that can be a good lesson for him to learn. All it's teaching the class is that they need to cheat (by getting their parents to do their homework) instead of doing it themselves!

I would make my feelings known very clearly!!

Blackpool_Saver

Absolutely no, think of all the germs, disgusting................

NAR

Thank goodness there are still some teachers out there prepared to instil discipline into pupils. Hopefully he will learn his lesson.

Horace

I think you should let the school get on with it as someone else has said. They are preparing him for life in the real world not cossetted at home (I am not saying that you do cosset him). They are teaching him to take responsibility - he has failed to follow instruction and then left his homework to the last minute thus resulting in a poorly made model and no doubt he probably gave his teacher some backchat as well thus he gets some lunchtime detentions. He then 'forgets' his Friday detention and ends up with more detentions and is given a spoon to clear chewing gum off desks - bad behaviour is rewarded with a punishment, if your child behaved himself and did as he was told then he wouldn't get detentions and wouldn't have had an icky job to do. Be thankful they gave him a spoon, at least they didnt give him a toothbrush and tell him to clean the toilets. He has disrespected his teachers by not turning up to receive his punishment and has thus wasted their time even more than he has done already.

When you get detention you learn from it, I certainly did, I was put on detention when I was at middle school because some twonk who was on detention spoke to me (we had to stand in the middle of the main corridor of the school outside the staff room) and this teacher spotted me and this kid and I was asked if I had been speaking to this lad and I said no but the lad said yes and I ended up on detention. I never even ventured into that corridor when folks were on detention not even to look at the noticeboard so I never got detention again.

BARGAINHUNTER!

To be honest, its the chewing gum thing that really got to me, but another poster has said that this was standard practice in his detentions so maybe I am just being a bit over sensitive? I was just a bit concerned that he was being humiliated by the teacher. I think my son has learned his lesson and will put more effort in in furure, and I doubt very much he will forget a detention again!

yes it is a very good school, and I don't want to go in and kick up a fuss if it is going to reflect badly on my son!

Minxy_Bella

NAR wrote: »

Thank goodness there are still some teachers out there prepared to instil discipline into pupils. Hopefully he will learn his lesson.

Hang on a minute - let's stick to the facts...

1) He's Year 7 - just turned 12. The fact that he did his homework means he cares about his schoolwork.

2) The fact that he did his homework independently means that he wants to do well on his own merits, rather than relying on his parents to do the project for him.

3) The fact that he left the project until the last minute shows that he's 12. With probably a million other things that he'd rather do than his homework. That proves he's normal.

4) The fact that he spent two hours on the homework proves that he does care about it. He could have spent half an hour and got the same punishment from the bully of a teacher - so how does that teach him a constructive life lesson?

5) The fact that he didn't just get one detention for 'not making enough effort' but THREE shows that his teacher is obviously more worried about grades (and a potential rollicking from the HOD) than nurturing a love of Geography in their students.

6) The fact that he forgot to go to his Friday detention shows that he's erm.....human! Ok, a replacement detention is fair, but to quadruple it? What's the name of this school? Bliddy Dotheboys Hall??????

7) Has he kicked or punched another student or teacher? Has he sworn or stolen property? Has he bunked off school and gone on the rampage with a machete? No - his 'crime' is to do his homework, just not to the satisfaction of one teacher.

I am all for instilling discipline into kids but to do that you have to show them respect and set a good example so that they want to emulate your behaviour. Punish them when their behaviour is unacceptable. Not when they've done what has been asked of them - by themselves - on time! That poor child!!!!!