MSE Pregnancy Club VII

searching_me

morning AM glad to see im not the only one up at stupid times on a saturday :rotfl: i say take him used to do zoe the power of good when she was little x

jillie1974

efrieze wrote: »

I have a friend who has a dilemma.She has a DS and has just found out that her beanie is another DS and she is devastated (truely). She was desperate for a daughter, only ever planned or wanted 2 children and now has gone into a depression abuot how she will never have the DD she always dreamed of. She found out yesterday and went to the doctor this morning as she was so depressed and has been signed off sick for a week (he insisted!!!). I don't know what I can say to her to make her feel better.She said that this is going to hang over her forever and isn't dealing with it very well. Any ideas if there are any support groups on this??? It might sound shallow to be so distressed about this, but to her it is a very BIG DEAL. And being told 'at least it's healthy' is not currently a consolation! Any advice I can give her???? Thanks

PS she is 20 + 4 (1 day after me!)

this is why i think you shouldnt be able to find out the sex of the baby...

searching_me

jillie but dont you think its bst to try to start dealing with the situation before the child is born then when it is and your also dealing with a newborn on top of it x

Nicki

I'm also quite shocked by efrieze's friend's reaction!

I know that sometimes shock tactics work in these circumstances. I wonder how the friend would react if she were "advised" that she should terminate her pregnancy and adopt a girl child? Not that I am suggesting for a moment that this is what she should do, but faced with such a stark proposal, maybe the protective impulse would kick in and she would realise that her boy baby is precious to her?

As others have said, is there no counselling advice which she could access (even privately funded) so she can resolve this before the baby is born?

searching_me

i lost a bubs last year like i know a couple knocking around here have ... part of me wanted a girl but im just happy thats he happy healthy and kicking hell out of me ... my personal belief be lucky you can have kids theres so many woman who are desperate and would do anything to have one no matter what they are x

3onitsway

jillie1974 wrote: »

this is why i think you shouldnt be able to find out the sex of the baby...

I can't decide about this.
She's found out now its a boy - so she's got another 20 weeks to get over it and get used to the idea.
Or, she could have not found out, gave birth to her boy and maybe the mothering instinct would have kicked in and she'd love him anyway - without the 20 weeks of thinking she didn't want him - iykwim!

Already having a DS (11) with Autism and learning difficulties, i'm just happy to have a new happy, healthy baby - whatever sex it turned out to be.

searching_me

on a lighter note can i eat chocolate cake in a morning?? x

efrieze

Thanks for all your comments. I think that when I speak to her it will be more 'get over it and feel lucky' rather than indulging her with the 'poor you, it must be difficult to deal with'. I have no qualms about being honest with her and telling her what she DOESN'T want to hear but I thought this was more of a sensitive one. But you guys seems to think that she doesn't warrant sympathy in any way! Thanks

efrieze

searching_me wrote: »

on a lighter note can i eat chocolate cake in a morning?? x

I've already eaten nearly a whole packet of biscuits, if that makes you feel any better...?

emlou2009

morning all! has anyone heard from MFD yet? she surely must have had the wee one by now? i hope so for her sake anyway! happy settled mum and baby vibes! oo and what about mel she's not been on yet today either, labour vibes/happy settled mum and baby vibes to both whichever is needed!!

can i have some labour vibes please, i'm getting desperate, EDD+8 now and no hope of induction til weds at the earliest :eek: BH's doing my head in and STILL bleeding and cramping from the sweep 3 days ago