Faking depression

Rustvaar

Been trying to write up a worthwhile response for about ten minutes but words escape me. Your mate's either a complete berk or trying to draw your attention to his current emotional state (Us guys have a bit of trouble sharing emotions, don't we?) so I would say engage him in conversation - at least that way you can gauge if he's serious or not.

Try talking to his parents, you've said he lives with his girlfriend now so it may be he tries to avoid his parents and feels like he's carrying too much responsibility for an 18 year old. I think a large number of teenagers come out of school and get a job and find it too isolated and boring - they want to go back to playtimes and lunchtimes and all their mates and hassling teacher so they slack off and get to be lazy which in the long run, doesn't make anything better.

I'm actually crossing my fingers that your friend is just a bit of a berk, because it'd be a shame for him to be suffering depression at such a stage in his life. (It's a shame for anyone but to get it at a time when you're young and should be out making mistakes and having a laugh ... it's not a nice thing)

Francesanne

onlyforboards wrote: »

Yes and then people assume there is nothing wrong with them and people get all het up about them being scroungers when in fact they are desperately ill and getting better while not working.

Can understand someone with true depression finding it very virtually impossible to work but find it hard to understand how some people suffering from so called 'stress & depression" can manage to do EVERYTHING but actually work. I know a couple of people who lead very active normal life but claim they can't work because of their problems and have managed to claim benefits for years. Maybe they just get stressed at the thought of having to work.

hayley11

After reading all this thread, I can't decide whether I think this bloke is a total waste of space or he's asking for help, in a round about kind of way.

If it's the first, then I personally think he's scum. Depression is not a joke and pretending to have it, is just making a mockery of all us people who do suffer from it. I wouldn't wish it on anybody.

And if he's thinking of taking medication, he'll probably end up getting genuinely depressed, the side effects knocked me for six the first time I went on my meds, I felt a million times worse, I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, my head felt full of cotton wool all the time, my sex drive was non existent etc. They only started helping after about 2 months and then it was a very slow process. And i'm back on them now, after being off them for 12 months and feeling all the horrid side effects again, although not as bad this time luckily.

Is his girlfriend on this little scam? If not, can she talk him out of it?

I'm not sure he'd be able to fake it, not long term anyway, I do suffer from severe depression and anxiety and to be honest, i'm not even sure I could fake it. Depression takes over your life, it's not something you can turn on and off.

To be honest, if a friend of mine ever suggested something as ridiculous of this, that'd be it for our friendship, I wouldn't want to be friends with somebody who could stoop that low.

It's it the latter though, maybe you just need to ask him outright, let him know you wont think any less of him and that you are there if he needs you.

DCFC79

hayley11 wrote: »

After reading all this thread, I can't decide whether I think this bloke is a total waste of space or he's asking for help, in a round about kind of way.

If it's the first, then I personally think he's scum. Depression is not a joke and pretending to have it, is just making a mockery of all us people who do suffer from it. I wouldn't wish it on anybody.

And if he's thinking of taking medication, he'll probably end up getting genuinely depressed, the side effects knocked me for six the first time I went on my meds, I felt a million times worse, I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, my head felt full of cotton wool all the time, my sex drive was non existent etc. They only started helping after about 2 months and then it was a very slow process. And i'm back on them now, after being off them for 12 months and feeling all the horrid side effects again, although not as bad this time luckily.

Is his girlfriend on this little scam? If not, can she talk him out of it?

I'm not sure he'd be able to fake it, not long term anyway, I do suffer from severe depression and anxiety and to be honest, i'm not even sure I could fake it. Depression takes over your life, it's not something you can turn on and off.

To be honest, if a friend of mine ever suggested something as ridiculous of this, that'd be it for our friendship, I wouldn't want to be friends with somebody who could stoop that low.

It's it the latter though, maybe you just need to ask him outright, let him know you wont think any less of him and that you are there if he needs you.

he isnt scum, he just gets some weird strange ideas and he thinks its the solution,

DCFC79

Rustvaar wrote: »

Been trying to write up a worthwhile response for about ten minutes but words escape me. Your mate's either a complete berk or trying to draw your attention to his current emotional state (Us guys have a bit of trouble sharing emotions, don't we?) so I would say engage him in conversation - at least that way you can gauge if he's serious or not.

Try talking to his parents, you've said he lives with his girlfriend now so it may be he tries to avoid his parents and feels like he's carrying too much responsibility for an 18 year old. I think a large number of teenagers come out of school and get a job and find it too isolated and boring - they want to go back to playtimes and lunchtimes and all their mates and hassling teacher so they slack off and get to be lazy which in the long run, doesn't make anything better.

I'm actually crossing my fingers that your friend is just a bit of a berk, because it'd be a shame for him to be suffering depression at such a stage in his life. (It's a shame for anyone but to get it at a time when you're young and should be out making mistakes and having a laugh ... it's not a nice thing)

i dont think he is 100% suffering from depression, hes just being a complete !!!!,

hayley11

DCFC79 wrote: »

he isnt scum, he just gets some weird strange ideas and he thinks its the solution,

I'm sorry but I think anybody who thinks depression is a joke, an easy way to get out of something, is scum. He is a poor excuse for a man. He needs to live in the real world for a while.

BUT if he is genuinally depressed, in some form or another, then of course I don't think that. I think he needs help and I hope he gets it

DCFC79

hayley11 wrote: »

I'm sorry but I think anybody who thinks depression is a joke, an easy way to get out of something, is scum. He is a poor excuse for a man. He needs to live in the real world for a while.

BUT if he is genuinally depressed, in some form or another, then of course I don't think that. I think he needs help and I hope he gets it

ok we will agree to disagree, he isnt what i would call scum, what he needs is a good kick up the backside,

onlyforboards_2

Francesanne wrote: »

Can understand someone with true depression finding it very virtually impossible to work but find it hard to understand how some people suffering from so called 'stress & depression" can manage to do EVERYTHING but actually work. I know a couple of people who lead very active normal life but claim they can't work because of their problems and have managed to claim benefits for years. Maybe they just get stressed at the thought of having to work.

Stress and depression can have a very long recovery period and can damage a person in ways you cannot see. Someone driving their kids about doing the shopping gardening and all sorts of day to day things is still avoiding pressured situations and still might not function after a very short period in a working environment. Or it might even be impossible for them to fill out a job application. People keep their failings very quiet.

fairy_gurl

DCFC79 wrote: »

A friend i know has a big idea to fake depression so he can get put onto anti depressants so then he can quit his job due to depression. No way do i agree with this but his cousins ahve told him what a silly idea it is but he doesnt listen as hes stubborn when he gets an idea in his head. My question is would the doctor put him on anti depressants straight away or would he have to do some test, would fking depression affect his chances of getting a job in the future ? the person is only 18 and he is bright so i dont know why he wants to do this, he has a job which i think is the reason why he wants to fake depression, the job is working for dominoes pizzas so it cant be that bad. Im asking as i dont know how the system works,

I am actually disgusted by your friend. If they knew what it was like or the effects it has on those you know then they wouldn't make a mockery out of this serious illness. My mum has had recurring depression for over 40 years and is very ill with it at the moment. She struggles to go into work, and I'm not going into specifics but things are very bad for her. To think that your 'friend' would 'fake' having depression sickens and disgusts me. Sadly I think some doctors can be deceived by blatant scammers.
If your friend has slight depression, which I doubt from your post, then I am sorry but when you have depression I have found the best thing is to keep busy and to your routine.
But if as this sounds he is just plain lazy then he needs to grow up, grow a pair and deal with life because it doesn't sound like he has it to bad.
Sorry if this was a little :mad: but it just infuriates me people who make a mockery out of serious illness which then makes other people make fun/doubt the seriousness of people who actually have the problem.

dori2o

I'm sorry but your friend is an idiot, and obviously has no self respect.

I suffer from depression that has been caused due to chronic pain I have suffered from for the past 3 years, I'm trapped in a cycle where chronic pain drives depression and depression increases the pain.

I take anti depressants, despite trying for as long as I could to combat it myself, and I still go to work everyday (this is nothing against those who are genuinley sufferring from depression and cannot physically face work). To think that someone of 18 years of age is willing to lie about a serious illness,that thousands of people each year fail to cope with, often ending in them taking their own lives is simply disgusting.

I hope he is caught out and given a severe punishment.