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If things get tougher?

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  • Sarahsaver
    Sarahsaver Posts: 8,390 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Two holidays is LOADS!

    Saying 'no we cannot afford it' occasionally to one's kids will equip them more for life than giving them everything they ask for and more besides.

    I for one have already collected the museum and art gallery leaflets for the summer and have printed off a blank calendar from the internet, listing all the days we will do free activities. i know my kids will enjoy themselves. I dont expect more fun were I spending a lot.
    Member no.1 of the 'I'm not in a clique' group :rotfl:
    I have done reading too!
    To avoid all evil, to do good,
    to purify the mind- that is the
    teaching of the Buddhas.
  • THIRZAH
    THIRZAH Posts: 1,465 Forumite
    Mummytofour

    I agree with Katieowl and the other posters. Your kids won't lose out. They may not realise it now but it is much better for them to spend time with you than have a vast amount of material things.I also gave up work when my eldest DD was born . This did mean that we had less money but we also had so much more time.We didn't have a lot of expensive outings but would do things like go for walks taking a picnic lunch or go to craft sessions or storytime at the library. I didn't conciously teach them how to manage money but they must have picked something up.

    Both my DDs went to good-very good universities-and managed on their student loans and what they could earn in the summer holidays.Unlike a lot of their friends they have never had overdrafts or run up credit card bills.They can both cook although I don't remember actually "teaching" them to cook and they certainly didn't learn at school.
  • mummytofour
    mummytofour Posts: 2,636 Forumite
    Wow peeps you are so full of support.

    I guess all the gloom and doom is wearing me down.. We have always found things hard money wise but I have reached a time where my kids are growing us so fast and I really want them to have a fabby childhood and have all the stuff I didnt. I guess I can only do what I can and they love me for it anyway.
    My kids are all really hard work ( lots of ADHD) But your all so right they dont need the world and not surprisingly they are already so good with money and love car boot sales and riding their bikes.

    Thanks guys I just need to take stock and try and be positive, it is scary tho with the recession/depression.

    I just wanted to add I know I want to take them away on holiday but we have not all been away for 3 yrs, its probaly just me wanting/dreaming far too much!
    Debt free and plan on staying that way!!!!
  • Primrose
    Primrose Posts: 10,702 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper I've been Money Tipped!
    For all those who are worrying about lack the inability to fund formal holidays, http://www.wherecanwego.com/ is a useful website to help you find free or paying activities in your area. Just put in your post code and some selected dates and all sorts of activities come up.
  • sb44
    sb44 Posts: 5,203 Forumite
    I've been Money Tipped!
    For all of those who can't afford a holiday have you thought of asking for camping equipment on your local freecycle site?

    http://www.freecycle.org/groups/unitedkingdom/

    I put in a want for one and had two replies.

    One was a 3 man dome tent (really for 2) the other was a 5 man frame tent which are about £400 new!

    I bought a couple of sleeping bags from Tesco in the sale, think they were £3 each.

    We haven't used the large one yet, our 9 year old has used the smaller one for playing in (in the back garden) but we intend to put the large one up in the garden and my DH and DD and the dog are going to sleep in it one night during the summer holidays.

    We can't afford hols either at the minute so a few nights in the back garden will be it.

    :)
  • pavlovs_dog
    pavlovs_dog Posts: 10,215 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    curv - i just wanted to take the time to say thanks for the POTM nomination. i was just thinking aloud (as usual :rolleyes: :D ) and it really wasnt expected. thank you :kisses3:
    kittie wrote: »
    yes I agree with pavlovs dog but would you mind please continuing the discussion on the discussion board as this thread is meant to be a help thread for people, now that times are hard and getting harder. There are people out there who are hanging on by a thread and who need all the help they can get and there are many many others who want to survive complete with home. They need help and not philosophy

    kittie i completely agree and yet disagree with the bit i have highlighted.

    a positive attitude is not going to put food on the table, i accept that. however neither does sitting at home moping cos we've not got 2 pennies to rub together until payday. a positive attitude against the doom and gloom is a very effective weapon in the current economic climate; its free of charge, untaxable, and supply is not exceeded by demand :D if we sit around with long faces because the news is full of headlines about this going up, that going down, we do ourselves no favours. for those who are on the knife edge, they risk becoming their own worst enemy by doing exactly that. if you believe that you cant win so why bother, you wont try, and so you set yourself up to lose. thats a very dark place to be in. all the MSE threads in the world cant help that person unless they can help themselves. good advice with a smile, thats my motto :D

    i have however started a discussion thread so i can witter to my hearts content. talk is cheap, so please feel welcome to join me. home made hobnobs a la twink for all xxx
    know thyself
    Nid wy'n gofyn bywyd moethus...
  • lil_me
    lil_me Posts: 13,186 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I suppose what's been said reflects the way I currently see things.

    Whatever happens, we'll all manage, somehow, we have to. People older than myself have been through much worse, through wars, through other times when the country was in a financial mess but they got through it ok, never has it been more suitable to listen about those times and realise we haven't exactly got it hard, we're not hiding in the shelter away from bombings, we've just got to think about what we're spending more, be thankful for what we do have instead of counting what we don't. There are so many things we have all probably become used to having so many non essentials we think they are something we need rather than something we want.

    I've spent over a year now getting our grocery spending down, it's now under half what I was spending 2 years ago, which proves to me I was just being wasteful. I don't class this as a massive achievement as much as a reality check, I am ashamed that I was so wasteful.

    As far as children go, my family were never well off, what I remember most isn't the little holidays in Scarbrough or wherever but when Dad made us breakfast after he'd done night shift, that someone collected me from school (ok was occasionally the other school cook who took us to meet Mam if Mam had swapped shifts as she worked in the school kitchens) that I didn't need a childminder because someone was always there for me etc. This is why I am less bothered about my sons having holidays and more bothered about being there for them as much as I can. I'd rather they remember spending every day with me than 4 weeks holiday a year. We've just bought a caravan after giving up at present on the florida dream holiday, I've decided I would rather wait a bit longer and take a few holidays very close to home (as in within 40 miles ish to save on fuel) in the caravan which I am hoping the boys will enjoy. It's eaten all of my savings to buy it and what we needed to go with it but I see it as an investment as holidays were costing me £25 a day for doggy care before we'd even got anywhere, now they are coming with us.

    I no longer, after a very long haul and being up to my eye balls have any credit card debts (have one which the balance is cleared monthly I got to help me repair my credit file), loans or storecards. I have just taken out some finance on the caravan we've just bought (in my partners name) but the interest is low and the payments are high as I chose that to pay it off sooner, my car is also on finance but the interest is something silly like 5%. The payments for both of these are less than I am saving each month from the grocery spending - shocking what I can pay for with the difference. It just came down to being more careful when I was spending money, wasn't any hardship involved, we probably eat and live better than ever before. I did additionally invest in a nice big BBQ, so instead of going out all the time we can enjoy the garden more.

    Fuels a major concern for me as that's what my partners current employment is based on being a driver, if things get too bad for his boss he'll have to sell up which is scary (DP is the only employee). He does have other qualifications inc HNCs etc to fall back on but job hunting when unemployed and having gaps in his employment won't be at the top of his wishlist.

    Like I said at the beginning of my waffly long post :o we'll get there, regardless, it might not be easy but it might help those who take more for granted realise what they have and help them to cherish it more.

    I've sat pondering over a Remouska tonight, but then thought about how much I would have to save in electricity to make the purchase pay for itself, I don't think it's worth it for me.

    With regards to camping holidays - Argos and Halfords (and probably many more) do a set inc a 4 man tent, sleeping bags etc etc for £99.99 in a bag which is easy to transport. My friends on about buying one then coming on holiday with us so she can share the caravan facilities, cheeky sod :rotfl:it can be as expensive or as cheap as you make it, you don't need loads of fancy equipment.
    One day I might be more organised...........:confused:
    GC: £200
    Slinkies target 2018 - another 70lb off (half way to what the NHS says) so far 25lb
  • scuzz
    scuzz Posts: 1,995 Forumite
    I know this will probably seem very basic to many, but as someone who's just received their first electricity bill in their first home of their own, don't forget to check the bills. I haven't moved into my flat yet, as it's not in a livable state yet. My bill for a quarter was £193:eek: That was estimated. Checked the meter, and it had ticked round one point, so will be calling on Monday with the actual reading and I'm sure this will make that cost plummet.

    I'm now only go to Tesco when I also need petrol. It's not on my way home, so I have to make a journey to get there so kill two birds with one stone. I avoid making trips into town unless I have to do something important. So I'm afraid I don't see my friends that often. But they've never made the effort to come to where I live, so I don't feel too bad about it.

    Mum and I were talking about how we can cut back. The dishwasher - which I always objected to - is to be turned off, the internet hub thing is to be unplugged after use and I hope I've finally got it through to her that there's no point in having the heating on at the same time as having the windows open.

    Our shopping has really reduced. Most luxeries have been dropped and it looks like once the contract expires, we'll lose broadband too.
    Comping, Clicking & Saving for Change
  • pavlovs_dog
    pavlovs_dog Posts: 10,215 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    scuzz wrote: »
    Our shopping has really reduced. Most luxeries have been dropped and it looks like once the contract expires, we'll lose broadband too.

    broadband is actually one of the few houshold bills that isnt rising much if at all (for basic service that is, obviously its different if you want the new faster-than-the-speed-of-light BB that they are slowing bringing out).

    due to the increasing number of wifi hotspots it is getting much easier to get free/ very cheap BB as required. the local library of course is another fantastic source of staying in touch with the world wide web
    know thyself
    Nid wy'n gofyn bywyd moethus...
  • lil_me
    lil_me Posts: 13,186 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    scuzz it's always worth giving an actual reading, I've never had a correct estimated bill ever. Have you thought of making enough with online savings either through surveys, money offf, cashback etc to cover your Broadband fees? Many on this forum do it. For example last year I paid £160 in Broadband fees, but I just in Quidco cashback earnings made £310 so it more than covered my costs - definately worth looking into.

    Trips into town :rotfl: I couldn't even tell you what is there!!! I went there to the dentist a while ago, when it was on the TV a little while ago I had to ask my partner where they were filming as it's all changed so much, I couldn't tell you what pubs are there at all (I'm not even 30 yet so don't think it's because I am really old) In Durham there isn't many shops I think I could save money by using, the market is actually quite expensive aswell so it's definately not worth the massive car park costs for me.

    Dishwasher - I remember reading about how much less it costs than heating water for what would be a full dishwasher load.

    Some things you have to weigh up what costs more, where you can save because of something else etc.

    Other examples - I registered with TescoHomepanels I don't get money but have had months worth of washing powder, tin foil, dishwasher tablets etc to test free as long as I fill in an online survey afterwards. I do surveys online and paid click through sites (when I remember) which makes a little, I usually get 'paid' in vouchers which I save up for Christmas and birthdays, but it all helps.
    One day I might be more organised...........:confused:
    GC: £200
    Slinkies target 2018 - another 70lb off (half way to what the NHS says) so far 25lb
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