How to (mentally) recover from a car accident?

roswell

I had my first accident (10 years of driving) in december around the icy time (only know this because i couldnt get a hire car for 2 days because of all the cars that had had accidents in the ice),

A short version of my accident was I was stationary facing uphil in a queue of traffic, I was last in the queue had 3 brake lights on 2 normal lights and 2 hazzard lights a young lady doing 50+ didnt notice me and drove straight into the back of me.

I was lucky Id seen she was going hit decided i couldnt take my foot off the brake as id be rolling backwards so went for plan B I stood on the brake and at impact went vertical (Sky view in rear mirror and tarmac view out the windscreen) my car came down landing on her bonnet. once all details were exchanged i drove the car home because i knew if i didnt I wouldnt get back in it, 3 days later i got a hire car thinking nothing of the accident i jumped straight into it and drove off all was great till I got to a junction and then the panic set in butterflies in the belly sweating , heart racing as each car pulled up behind me.

I tried to tell myself that in 10 years of driving 1000`s of cars have pullled up behind and never hit me it didnt work, i then realised that its the most recent event that the brain is remembering eg Last time you drove on ice you crashed you now have top teach yourself that you wont crash EVERYTIME you drive on ice. This is how I got over my fear of cars pulling up behind me.

Sadlly I got my car back from being repaired and crashed it less than 24 hours later ... I hit ice so can fully appreciate how you are feeling, i know im not a bad driver and i was actualy planning on doing the AIM course this Jan but due to not having a car in December put it off, My ice accident hasnt affected me to much because i steered into the slide and it got worse so I had 2 options steer into it more and risk rolling or complete opposite lock and pray I went for the second option and got away with a buckled front wheel. Car was found to not be straight from initial repairs to the rear end hence the ice crash.

In short get out thier and just keep building the confidence up it will take time but you will get thier.

The_Undercover_ADI

Scuba, the IAM (Institute of Advanced Motorists) or RoSPA (Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents) groups simply involve one of their advanced drivers and trained helpers sitting in with you as you drive your own car.

They will give you advice, including hints and tips on how to keep yourself safe and hopefully give you back the confidence to drive comfortably again.

There is absolutely no need to sit the exam if you feel this would be counter-productive, though after a few sessions you may feel up to challenging yourself.

BSM and the like are commercial companies. You would pay through the nose for what you get from these charitable organisations offer for as long as you like, for only the cost of membership.

Don't get me wrong, I am a professional and I charge for sessions, but the charitable organisations are far better value for money for individuals. By all means seek professional help if you want, but the value these guys offer is great. £99 for as many lessons as you want for a year? I'd love to see bsm price match that one!

Jem8472

Sorry to hear baout you accident.

I came off my motorbike about a month ago. On the way to work at about 5:45am and going first left on a roundabout. As I approached the roundabout some kn*b in a beemer came alongside me so I was not paying attention to the corner. The back stepped out then went the other way and then I came off.

But the bike was ok, helmet got replaced and I rode it home. I just tend to be a bit more careful now on corners. But had on effect on me mentally.

spuds_2

Scubabe, how you are feeling is totally understandable after a scary incident. Many, many people get this after accidents, illness, being a victim of a crime. Traumatic incidents can take a long time to get over. Common symptoms are panic attcks, palpitations, flashbacks, feeling anxious a lot of the time (without reason), having a sort of safe area/comfort zone, but feeling stressed when you move outside this, being okay when someone is with you but feeling anxious on your own.

Some people are able to quickly put accidents behind them, but for many of us it takes a while. Our logic kind of goes out of the window, and we feel worried that a similar thing is going to occur.

Here are some books which are generally highly rated by people dealing with anxiety, depression etc. Available at WHSmiths and Amazon usually:

Self-Help for Your Nerves - Dr Claire Weekes: lots of people love this book, it's very reassuring.

Feeling Good: New Mood Therapy - Dr David Burns: cognitive therapy book which helps you to get your logic back and see things as they are.

The Worry Cure: Stop Worrying, Start Living: Robert Leahy.

You have done really well so far by confronting your fears head-on. It will take time, but you will get there and be back to the person you were. There are lots of helpful web-sites on anxiety, just google anxiety or post traumatic stress disorder.

If you are feeling really, really bad you could see your GP who may prescribe something like mild beta-blockers which will just take the edge off the anxiety as a short-term measure. There are lots of forums, so don't suffer in silence.

This is a summary of PTSD:

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-ptsd/index.shtml


Best wishes. I hope you feel better soon.

cyclonebri1

In addition to my previous post and very much in relation to the above post I would like to offer this;

Back in the early 80's, after 15 years or so of accident free driving on 2 and 4 wheels, I had 3 accidents in a little over a week:eek: . 2 of these occured when I was stationary, and the 3rd I was hit in the side. All were proven in my favour.

BUT, for a month or so after I thought everytime I went out someone was going to hit me. They didn't. Never had so much as a scratch since,(touch wood).

This kind of s***e gets to us all once in a while, it's known as life, murphy's law or whatever.

It doesn't last forever;)

Scubabe

Thanks so much all for all your fab posts, I appreciate them.

Unfortunately, I have the worst luck in the whole wide world. I hit a patch of ice last Wednesday and spun my car I can't believe this has happened to me again!! Why me of all people, I was already fragile but that kinda tipped me over the edge. I made my hubby drive me around for the rest of the week and all weekend, I thought I would never be able to drive again. But today he couldn't take me to work, so this morning I was brave and I drove again. Cried the whole way, but I managed it.

I have an appointment with my GP for this Wed to see how he can help, and I have also spoken to my local RoSPA group (thanks so much for that tip Undercover ADI!!) and they have a course starting next week which I might join. I don't know if I am ready for that yet, but it's not going to kill me to go to the 5 x classroom lessons, and then I can decide if I am ready to do the practical sessions.

Thanks spuds for the book recommendations.

I hate winter