How to (mentally) recover from a car accident?

V_tricky

goldspanners wrote: »

whos insurance should they claim? the met office?

Durr - that'll teach me to skim read! Although in theory it's possible to sue the council for failure to grit the road (there is caselaw to support) in reality, it just doesn't happen.

It might be worth the OP talking to their GP still, despite a likely lengthy waiting list if this problem is still not getting any better thru time.

onetomany

r bless you hun maybe you can get someone to check your tyres in frount of you might make you feel better, i would try talking to you doctor maybe a counsellor might be able to help, i think you are very brave, but please dont keep this bottled up for much longer , let us know what you decide sending you lots of love xxxxxxxxx

Scubabe

Thanks all for your ideas and suggestions. I’ve never experienced any kind of icy conditions before – I’m not from the UK and we don’t have much black ice in the tropics! I honestly thought I was going to die, sliding all over the road, straight into incoming traffic, flipping the car...

I’m not sure how I feel about an Advanced course – having some examiner sitting next to me, marking my driving skills when I’ve already got low confidence levels?? Does the “course” involve lessons in a car or just in a classroom? Sorry, I’ve had a look on the website linked and I cannot find detailed information on what you get for £99… And yes, that would take me a couple of months to save that sort of spare cash, but it’s certainly not out of reach.

I would love to do a “skidpan” experience, but the only 2 I can find near me both use their own cars (understandable), but they are manual transmissions, and I drive automatics so I wouldn’t feel comfortable having to work out a manual as well as having to deal with the sensation of sliding again…

Thanks for the suggestions to speak to my GP, and also to look into hypnotherapy… I did hypno a few years ago to quit smoking and it was excellent so I may try that.

I had high hopes I could get free counselling over it, hubby works for a large company and they use one of those Care helpline things, I thought spouses were allowed to use it too, but I’ve just found out they can’t, so there went that idea. I can’t really afford counselling on my own, I’m so disappointed that it’s an “employee only” service and not a whole of family service.

Oh well.

Thanks for all your responses, I’d still love to hear how others coped post-accident with getting “back in the saddle” so to speak.

Hintza

you can of course do the exam. But I think you want to tell them the problem and they will offer you good advice on a course that would suit. You will find the experience very beneficial and will of course be able to arrange a skidpan if you want that. However I suggest just taking it one step at time inder their guidance is the best way forward. I might add the BSM and others alo offer similar services.

Give them call and have chat it won't cost you anything.

madmalteaser

Having done a skid pan exercise I can assure you, you don't need to worry too much about gears. It's all done at very low speed and you only ever use the first 2 gears, it's more about teaching you how to control a car in a skid situation.

I would say, though, I'm not sure if this would be the right thing for you. I know someone who experienced the same thing as you years ago, and she was absolutely terrified on the skid pan, hated the whole experience and couldn't wait to get out of the car.

I wouldn't know what else to suggest but I really hope you can get through this. Good luck with whatever you attempt. x

violetta

This type of black ice accident happened to DD six to seven weeks ago as well, probably during the same spell of icy weather. Although she did not bang her head as far as she knows, she has no recollection whatsoever of the actual accident. Remembers turning out of our road onto the main road, then next thing she remembers is being asked by an ambulanceman if she was able to get out of the car. She hit a Shanks waste disposal lorry, so was lucky to get away with only a deep cut to her knee which needed stitches. Accident only happened about 200 yards from home.

She has therefore not had the same problem of being able to remember details of the accident, but I told her about your experiences and she says that she completely understands how you are feeling as it is taking her a lot of courage to drive again. She says she is suspicious of the road conditions, even when she knows for sure it cannot be icy, and when going round bends she has a sensation the car may slide, notwithstanding knowing the road conditions are different - and this is without remembering the index event. Her friend, who was rear ended whilst stationary by a transit van some time ago, had the same problem for a little while afterwards, constantly looking in her rear view mirror when stopped in a line of traffic, expecting any vehicle coming up behind to slam into her.

I think in the end time is going to be a great healer, and you are going about it in the right way by continuing to drive in the meantime.

Scubabe

madmalteaser wrote: »

Having done a skid pan exercise I can assure you, you don't need to worry too much about gears. It's all done at very low speed and you only ever use the first 2 gears, it's more about teaching you how to control a car in a skid situation.

Oh that's great to know! I was worried I was going to have to hit the pan doing 50 or 60, that would have freaked me out for sure!

I would say, though, I'm not sure if this would be the right thing for you. I know someone who experienced the same thing as you years ago, and she was absolutely terrified on the skid pan, hated the whole experience and couldn't wait to get out of the car.

You know, I really do agree. I'd love to have the courage to go on a skid pan, but right now I don't think it's the right thing for me to do... but it is my aim. I hope to work on this and eventually be in a position to do it!

Thanks so much for your post!

Scubabe

violetta wrote: »

This type of black ice accident happened to DD six to seven weeks ago as well, probably during the same spell of icy weather.
<snip>
She says she is suspicious of the road conditions, even when she knows for sure it cannot be icy, and when going round bends she has a sensation the car may slide, notwithstanding knowing the road conditions are different

Ooooh I was so happy to read your post Violetta! Your daughter sounds like she is going through the exact same thing as me - I am constantly feeling like I'm sliding again. Please give your daughter a huge hug from me, I know how hard it is to appear normal when really you don't feel normal at all.

I think the worst part is knowing that I am being completely irrational but not being able to do anything about it.

Anyway, I have made an appointment to see my GP next week and have a chat about it all, there might be somewhere he can send me for help or support or something.

Thanks everyone!!

Quinny_2

Or if you want to learn car control,then you could always book a day at a rally school...... :rotfl:

As an ex rally car co-driver,I can tell you there's nothing like it.

jaydeeuk1

Quinny wrote: »

As an ex rally car co-driver,I can tell you there's nothing like it.

That would be my 2nd best job in the world. Driving being the best of course