Estranged husband handing keys to house back to bank

Dithering_Dad

neas wrote: »

Of course not, As a fellow non-owner of a home I talk to them of greedy landlords and rising HPI which have hindered their life and progression onto the ladder.

You must be a barrel of laughs. Do you find people edging away from you at dinner parties? Actually, do you even get invited to dinner parties?

Clairobelle

Thank you all again for your (mostly) helpful and constructive replies - and yes neas this is a dig at you. I married my husband never thinking for a moment that he would have an affair and then try to kick us out of our home. Yes, we did remortgage, we were living beyond our means. I knew this, i asked him if we could move 5 years ago to a much smaller and manageable house as i wanted to resolve this situation. He however was and is mentally and emotionally abusive, he bullied me for years and would not leave our home. Yes i have learnt a lesson, if i ever take on another mortgage i will take it on in my name. I will never put my children's stability at risk again, but what newlywed would consider that first time round? You'd have to be a cynical and cold hearted person to even consider it in my opinion. Maybe you fit that bill? Well if you do then good luck to you - i hope youre happy. If you have nothing to say thats constructive then stay off this thread.

And for your information, my ex did this purely because i asked him for help with paying the bills. It was a purely spiteful response. Thats the way he is unfortunately. I will ask him to pay me maintenance if he does not pay the mortgage and i have told my solicitor i need this to happen.

For everyone else thank you. I'm going to the council this afternoon to sort out what i am entitled to lha and i will be asking them what my options are. i understand council housing is not an option until i am made homeless.

I shall see if he follows through with this. My solicitor has said that if i can agree to my taking my name off the deeds, and i need his consent, then i wont be liable for the shortfall. This may be an option as i have could bargain with him by not going for his pension - which he has built up while i have supported him and raised his chilren while he was away working mon-fri before you start neas! She also said that if he can afford it but intentionally does not pay it then she is pretty sure that he will also be liable.

Thank you all again, knowing there are options for me are great comfort at this time.

Claire x

Clairobelle

neas wrote: »

and all im saying is... next time she gets a mortgage dont MEW and borrow money even in a rising market... its just risky.

neas, thanks for your advice, i really appreciate it. i promise i wont do it again. I've learnt a hard valuable lesson, which is putting mine and my childrens future at risk. You made your point. Go gloat somewhere else.

neas

dinner parties... sorry im too 'common' for that my old chum... chin chin and all that.

If you mean I go round for a pint at my mates, or a cofee with the wife or entertain guests sometime yes... thanks for your concern of my social life... its greatly appreciated.

neas

I'm sorry clariobelle im taking my frustration out on you, but i imagine theres sooo many more people like you and thats whats annoying for me.

I was/am prudent and i'm being penalised in many ways to prop up banks, to rescue homeowners, to reduce interest and thus mortgage rates... all because others borrowed too much or had fun time skiing in the alps, travelling the world... all the time i scrimped and saved for my savings to get trodden down.

I guess you'd say I was bitter that I have no say in the matter, that the prudent get screwed and the reckless get helped out. Still as you say you won't be doing that again, i doubt most of the country will for 15-20 years.... MEWing was a bad mistake for alot of people in country.

People MEW and live a rich lifestyle and end up believeing they are reach but actually their net 'worth' is less than 0..

Fly_Baby

neas might not have found the smoothest way to make his point but he is right in an essence. A big debt (especially secured on the house) is a bad thing. However, in the OP's situation we don't know if she actually had any say when the house was remortgaged. She might have been against it but couldn't do anything because of her abusive spouse.

Fly_Baby

OP, I really feel for you. I have two children too and it would be killing me to find myself in your situation.

Do you want to try to keep the house for your children? How big are your mortgage payments now (have they gone down with the interest rate cuts)? What's your own total income - is there any chance you could afford it, perhaps, to go on the interest only for a while? What do you think of taking in lodgers as a few posters suggested?

Lots of luck!

copier_guy

Hope it all goes ok for you Clairobelle.

Clairobelle

Tbh Fly baby i'd rather just get out of the house then he has no more control over me. I dont earn enough to cover the mortgage, i can barely cover the bills! And its not been a home where i've been particularly happy, so i have no emotional attachment to it other than my children growing up there. My children (8 & 6) are fairly excited about moving to a new house so at least thats not adding to the pressure. As long as they have their belongings and their mum i think they would live anywhere. Just as well lol.

Ember999

confused31 wrote: »

Very harsh, the lady stated her husband left her and she was working 20 hours a week and looking after her two children, if i left my missus and had a joint mortgage and like most responsible parents if they could pay it, they would pay their half, just to keep a roof over their kids heads.

Its obvious when they were living together they could afford it, maybe her husband was the main bread winner, but for someone to say she should have been prepared for it is a load of waffle.

How many couples who take joint mortgages out say we better not have a joint mortgage just incase one of us decides to start having affairs.

Just hope it dont happen to you, you dont know her husband might have lost his job thats why he can not pay.

And then you get some jumped up txat like you telling her thats life, she should have been prepared for it.

Some people!!!!!!!!

confused

Well said! :T