Toddler not talking

Spendless

I found a huge difference between 2 and 2 and a half with my ds. Shortly after his 2nd birthday we visited relatives who had a boy 6 months older. My ds said a few words, theirs chatted in sentences. I panicked like mad but 6 months later ds was at the same level their child had been.

pandora205

Hi - I just wanted to reassure you about support available in most areas. Your health visitor will probably do a developmental check, looking at all areas of development, and if necessary suggest a referral to speech and language therapy and possibly a paediatrician if she/you are worried. It is also likely that your child would be referred to audiology for full hearing checks, as this is often a cause of language delay.

SALTs work in a range of ways with young children, from clinic sessions, to home visits, to supporting staff in preschools, and some run parent groups, which are very helpful. If you could make an initial assessment session it would make sense to explain your difficulties (or ask the health visitor to do this) as it could affect the support offered. The speech therapist will look at a whole range of aspects of development related to language and communication/social interaction skills.

I'm an educational psychologist and we also see young children with a range of difficulties in development/behaviour. We take referrals from paediatricians, SALTS, preschools and directly from parents, and can advise on children's needs and work with parents to support the family. (I can recall a similar situation a few years ago, where I encouraged the parents to register the child at a nursery at the local family centre and then asked a link worker to support the mother by making home visits, as like you she was reluctant to leave the house).

See what happens when the health visitor does her checks (which will be simple games and activities) and what support is suggested.

alwaysonthego_2

Spendless wrote: »

I found a huge difference between 2 and 2 and a half with my ds. Shortly after his 2nd birthday we visited relatives who had a boy 6 months older. My ds said a few words, theirs chatted in sentences. I panicked like mad but 6 months later ds was at the same level their child had been.

exactly all children develop at their own rate. My dd2 does not stop chatting now and like Spendless I was panicking

*Maya*

wannabe_sybil wrote: »

Thank you - he is not really mixing with other children apart from once a week - I am ashamed to say I have had a lot of problems but the current lot of medication seems to be working.:o

I am going to try and get him to a local playgroup but that will be a test for me. Also I want to try and get him to Church (I believe, but I want him to go there for the social side which is extremely good for little ones). I am hoping that this will help.

He is such a calm child, seems to take everything in his stride, doesn't flap about anything except the hoover. I am fine taking him out with dear heart and when he has taken us to places where there are strange animals, odd sights, unusual things then little bear is just interested or intrigued. He has not inherited this from me:rolleyes: Dear heart has not been able to take us out much due to various problems... It has been a bit difficult.

The child really does need to interact with other children. Quite aside from the speech worries it's just his basic right.
I also recommend Homestart as they will take him out for a while but although you imply you have mental health problems, you are the one who needs to take him out so he can interact with someone else more than once a week.
Wishing you all the best.

His name isn't really bear is it?

wannabe_sybil

alwaysonthego wrote: »

Op have you tried to contact Home start http://www.home-start.org.uk/
a voluntary organisation to support people in your situation. Perhaps they could take your child out whilst you rest. Children learn from observing their peers and you will find that he will develop further when he starts to interact with other children. Don't feel guilty, you want the best for your son and the best start in life for him is a good attachment with his mummy.

The Health Visitors are being very supportive. I did get put in touch with, I think, this organisation (or similar) and I was left in a state of panic. I couldn't get them to hear anything I said. It was if I had just agreed, not voiced any concerns. They seemed to have a very odd agenda as well. I needed to get to a centre to buy shoes for little bear. They didn't seem to hear that, they were just talking about taking the bus to a park (there is similar within walking distance). Also I was having lots of dizzy spells (medication has caused problems) and they didn't hear that either. I couldn't physically do some of the things they were assuming I would go along with. It was awful. I had to say that I wouldn't go along with any of it. They would have done things that would have caused trouble between me and dear heart. Dear heart prefers little bear to be left with me.

I felt awful afterwards because I felt I had to do it all on my own, and I was struggling so much, but the Health Visitors arranged this lady to help me get to a Sure Start playgroup and that has been marvellous for little bear. He has copied behaviour there and really come on. Also the medication seems to have settled down. I do feel bad that my weakness has given little bear a disadvantage.

*Maya*

wannabe_sybil wrote: »

I may start signing, just to get some more communication.

If you say he understands you and you understand him then signing isn't necessary.

Loz01

Perhaps it is that he isnt mixing too much with other children - maybe because he knows you understand his needs, he has no need to try and communicate furthur than the way he does now? If it is just the two of you a lot, he may just be used to that and used to not talking, so has just slacked a little with developing his speech. Im sure once he interacts a bit more with other kids he will pick it up easily! I wouldnt worry though - kids always pick it up in the end :rotfl: its either walking or talking, they'll do one and not the other but eventually will do both!

alwaysonthego_2

wannabe_sybil wrote: »

I needed to get to a centre to buy shoes for little bear. They didn't seem to hear that, they were just talking about taking the bus to a park (there is similar within walking distance). Also I was having lots of dizzy spells (medication has caused problems) and they didn't hear that either. I couldn't physically do some of the things they were assuming I would go along with. It was awful. I had to say that I wouldn't go along with any of it. They would have done things that would have caused trouble between me and dear heart. Dear heart prefers little bear to be left with me.

Does your husband support you?

wannabe_sybil

*Maya* wrote: »

The child really does need to interact with other children. Quite aside from the speech worries it's just his basic right.
I also recommend Homestart as they will take him out for a while but although you imply you have mental health problems, you are the one who needs to take him out so he can interact with someone else more than once a week.
Wishing you all the best.

His name isn't really bear is it?

I have suffered from severe depression, then I had a bad reaction to the meds. I tried to get him to the local shop at least once a day, but there were quite a few days when I couldn't have walked that far myself, I could barely manage stairs. Dear heart has had problems from other sources as well which made it hard for him to take us out as a family.

I feel so bad I am letting him down. However, I hope that now that the meds have calmed a little then I can get him out more. I do want the best for him.

No, his name is not bear but that was the pet name that stuck!

*Maya*

No one is saying you are weak.

Does your husband ( I presume that is who "dear heart" is, know of all your problems? Can I ask why he still doesn't want your little boy to be with other people?

Sorry you had a bad experience but Homestart are completely different to Surestart.