Pocket money (merged)

blueberrypie

Valli wrote: »

I know he can't get a job now - but he's 16 in September so can then...

Some of what I wrote will still apply even when he's 16, because he will still be of "compulsory school age". Daft, but there you go.

doelani

When my kids where teenagers ( yougest now 19 ) they earned their pocket money by doing jobs around the home. Walking dog, feeding dog , hoovering stairs etc. Any day they did not do their job they lost 1/5 of their pocket money. They were only expected to do jobs mon-fri

Now my stepchildren, get money from their mum, she tops their phones up most months and we do it if we have extra at end of month ( which at minute is not to often ) . We do not give them regular pocket money, maybe £1 here and £1 there.

I would like to give them regulary but I feel they have to earn it, they do not as if we do not give them they know their mum will.

An example is 12yo was asked to clean car inside and walk dog and he would get £5, he said no as he " could not be bothered" that day, but that was the day we needed it done. We then offered this to the 15yo who refused as she " had money".

At times they have been asked to do things to earn topups for phones and the answer is " no because mum will give it to us" They do not see the point of having to earn pocketmoney here when they get it at other house for doing nothing.

They do all clean their own rooms and as this is where they sleep this is not a condition of them geting money.


Just wondered what others think of teenagers and pocket money ?

newlywed

The step kids mum pays them for making cups of tea, loading the dishwasher, or putting their laundry in the basket. In addition to the money she pays them she also buys their phone top ups, numerous dvd's games etc.

When they are at ours, we expect them to help lay the table, bring cups back to kitchen etc (really not very much), but they moan every time - probably because their mum would pay them to do it.

When they come to leave school/college and start work, I would expect them to do those kind of things anyway - without pay - do their own washing, clean up the kitchen after themselves.

So I don't think paying them to do the day to day stuff you would expect them to do in a family setting is such a great idea.

But mowing the lawn, cleaning the car etc I do agree should have monetary incentives.

Just my opinion

valkirn

I personally think teenagers should earn their pocket money as it helps them understand the value of money (or it did me anyway lol) My parents are very old fasioned and would often tell both me and my brother "if you cant afford it, you cant have it" there were no mobiles then but both me and my brother had hobbies we kept up with and needed money for, my dad managed to get me a paper round when i turned 13 and i earned my pocket money that way as did my brother when he was old enough.
If we chose not to do our rounds one morning our money was docked and that was that no pleading with the manager, and if we couldnt have things or do the things we enjoyed then it was tough.

Lunar_Eclipse

I don't have teenagers, but the belief in our house is that the children are expected to help out around the house without being paid for it (just as we do). However this option seems to be the least peaceful and hardest path to follow. Typical!

Thus they currently get pocket money for "nothing." It is very hard to motivate anyone to do big tasks (like cleaning the car) regularly out of the goodness of their hearts, so I can see the dilemna you are facing!

I don't think there is a right or wrong way, just what works for you. I suppose at the end of the day I would much rather clean the car myself (less often) than rely on negative parenting and unhappy childhood memories to coerce the children to do it. I always keep the long term in mind since in the big scheme of things, little matters (we have a messy car!) 'With me' usually works well, perhaps because mine are under 10.

Good luck. Sorry my post wasn't particularly helpful!:)

EmmaLi

I had to work in the family business from a young age and, whilst I think we were expected to do a bit too much, I do think that teenagers should expect to earn money or other things.

My 15 yo SD is given everything she wants and is not expected to do anything at home. She has absolutely no motivation or drive to do anything and expects to be given everything. I think it does them good to earn their money as they learn the value of money and what the real world is about.

macman

doelani wrote: »

When my kids where teenagers ( yougest now 19 ) they earned their pocket money by doing jobs around the home. Walking dog, feeding dog , hoovering stairs etc. Any day they did not do their job they lost 1/5 of their pocket money. They were only expected to do jobs mon-fri

Now my stepchildren, get money from their mum, she tops their phones up most months and we do it if we have extra at end of month ( which at minute is not to often ) . We do not give them regular pocket money, maybe £1 here and £1 there.

I would like to give them regulary but I feel they have to earn it, they do not as if we do not give them they know their mum will.

An example is 12yo was asked to clean car inside and walk dog and he would get £5, he said no as he " could not be bothered" that day, but that was the day we needed it done. We then offered this to the 15yo who refused as she " had money".

At times they have been asked to do things to earn topups for phones and the answer is " no because mum will give it to us" They do not see the point of having to earn pocketmoney here when they get it at other house for doing nothing.

They do all clean their own rooms and as this is where they sleep this is not a condition of them geting money.


Just wondered what others think of teenagers and pocket money ?

When they next come in from school hungry, say you 'could not be bothered' to cook them any tea, and point them to the kitchen. They'll soon get the idea...

GSXRCarlos

did anyone see that tv programme about kids who were dependant on their mums and dads? sums it all up quite well i think

carolinosourus

Young, Dumb and Living off Mum. It was amazing. I was so shocked that people are like that, and some of the parents kept on making excuses for their little darlings despite seeing their actions in colour (black and white doesn't quite work when they were watching a colour tv)!

I'm 23 and seeing that 25 year old I was gobsmacked, I can't imagine sitting on my **** all day doing nothing. It's available on the bbc iplayer and definitely worth a watch. The bit with the pea soup cracked me up "I thought you just put peas in a pan and they melt". Classic.

But to get to the point, yes I believe that kids should earn their pocket money. It teaches them the value of money and also teaches them useful life skills, like how to clean, use a washing machine, how to cook etc. That's how we did it when I was little and I had to be the one at uni who showed everyone how to live like adults. It's amazing that some parents send their little darlings off to uni totally unequipped to be self-sufficient!

Also, even if I "had money" if I was offered the chance to get more, I'd have jumped at it!

Rant over

myothercarisaferrari

I'll do your chores for pocket money