Depression Support Thread

BizzyBek

Hi Voofin and welcome. My mum has fibro so I know the stress that can put on you. As for going back to being yourself I think it's always best that none of us can go back in time, no-one with or without depression etc can be who they were, we all have to look forward to who we can be.

Slightly stressful day. Accompanied Mum to hospital for an appointment. She had little one off bleed end of last year which the consultant says is all the hall marks of a h'roid but as she's of a certain age and we have a decent health trust here as routine they will send her for a bottom telescope (okay so that's not the proper name:rotfl: ) She gets herself very worked up about such things and me, whose had panic attacks etc should be sympathetic but tend to get short tempered instead, doh! A fortnight to go and hopefully it will all be done and dusted.

shazrobo

hi all, hope everyone is ok today, had a really good day today, no appointments, no kids. instead ian and myself went to a shopping centre not too far from where i live and had a good time, just browsing around the shops, and enjoying each others company.
then this afternoon, i called into my craft group, which has been closed for 2 weeks, and had a chat and caught up with friends, whilst doing a bit of knitting. really enjoy the craft groups we have one on a tues and one on a fri afternoon, and its so good to just get out of the house for a few hours, and chat with other adults instead of teenage monkeys lol

hi voofin, and welcome to the thread. i used to have a problem with alcohol, and ended up refering to an alcohol services group. i think if you are starting to buy alcohol in order to keep it a secret how much you are drinking, then there may be a problem starting. i still drink, but never during the day now.
please feel free to pm me, if you wish

hugs all
shaz xxx

voofin

thanks for replies

shazrobo wrote: »

and ended up refering to an alcohol services group.

I was referred to communitie addiction team which is probally the same about 11 years ago when I was drinking to much and did stop becuse I thought I was going to lose my children.

So many problems who do I turn to ? all seems pointless

Tiff_2

Hi voofy!
Come on in, hunnie. I noticed you when you joined the clan as it were, and welcomed you. You didn't give anything away in your first post and no-one should be pushed into sharing things, so I'm really glad you posted angel. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. Let's have a look here sweetheart...

voofy wrote:

hello

voofy wrote:

I have been around reading but not posting, been suffering from depression on and off for about 14 years, this time 3 years. I spent 6 months in hospital 3 years ago and my life has never been back to normal since, have had cbt, couselling for "one" of my underlying causes, see cpn monthly and phyciatrist monthly. On top of this I also suffer from Fibromyalgia. I am just so fed up with it all. i do not think I will ever be 100% again back to my old self.

At the minute I have been feeling low for a few weeks, I have started to drink, not a lot, one or two a day to make me feel better. I know this is not the answer because I did this years ago to block things out. It scares me though as this morning I went and bought my " own" drink to hide so hubby does not notice I am drinking as the drink we keep in house was starting to get low. The first thing I thought about when I got up this morning was " what have I to do before I can have a drink"
This has only been happening for about a week, so is not a problem, but how long before it becomes a problem ?

I'll only ever tell you my honest opinion, angel and not just what you want to hear because it won't help you. I have to start with your last sentence first - it is already a problem, hunnie.

If it wasn't a problem you were concerned about, then you wouldn't have posted about it. As I'm sure you know voofy hun, when you start thinking about where you can hide a bottle, or when can you have your first drink, then it's a problem. You know from past experience that this is going to cause you more harm than good and that those problems are always there after a drinking session and can seem even worse and harder to deal with. Please go and see your gp hunnie and stop this downward slide before it gets any worse. I'm sure you'll know that drinking and meds is a dangerous combination, angel - please don't put yourself at risk.
I'm glad you're scared angel because you'll know this is your body's way of asking for help with both your depression and your physical illness and we're more likely to seek help when we get scared. I'm sure you have a contact number for your cpn hunnie, so please give them a call too - don't wait for that monthly appointment to come around. The more support you can get, the better.

When you've had depression for a very long time and then you acquire a long term physical illness too, it can break your mood and make you feel hopeless and helpless. I really feel for you, voofy. I can reassure you with the fact that what you're feeling is perfectly normal and that many others feel the same way. May I also suggest that you talk to hubby, sweetheart? I know you must be dreading him finding out, but it just places more stress on you and makes your physical and mental health symptoms worse. Talk to him now, at the beginning, before there's anything more serious to tell him. It'll make things easier on both of you. If you can start to keep communicating honestly with hubby and your professionals hun, you'll feel more supported.

When we have a combination of physical and mental health problems, we tend to hang back in asking for help.
After all, they know how much pain I'm in and what's wrong with me, so they'll just think I'm complaining if I mention it. And surely, isn't this just part of it all and I will just have to get used to it?
NO! It means you need extra support hunnie, not less. Mental ill health clients are always reluctant to ask for help anyway and commonly don't believe they can get any, which is part of the mental ill health itself. And to have physical health problems too makes asking for help even harder and depression even deeper. You need to open up to them and tell them honestly how bad you're feeling. If you don't tell them the whole truth, they can't give you the right amount of help and support angel. They can try and work together with you and adapt your treatments, both physical and mental symptoms. If it makes it easier, print off your post to show the dr or write a letter. You could also possibly ask hubby or a close friend or family member to come with you for support, even if they stay in the waiting room. I'm sure your cpn would go with you.

Here are a couple of sites which may give you an idea of how to cope with physical illness and depression. The second one is from the Manchester NHS. I'm not a professional sweetie, so please always check things out first for yourself and with your own medical professionals.

I've posted these links so that you can see that the professionals do recognise that physical and mental ill health affect each other. They don't just dismiss it.

http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mentalhealthinfo/problems/physicalillness/copingwithphysicalillness.aspx

http://www.manchesterpct.nhs.uk/document_uploads/mental_health/emotional wellbeing.pdf


The best suggestion I have is that you go and talk to the local professionals that already know you and your medical history. It's not just about dealing with one or the other, it's also about dealing with both of them as an overall situation because they do affect one another.
I think you were really brave to post what you did hunnie. I know what you're going through voofy and it's obvious you're a natural survivor to have come through all you have up to now. Don't be afraid, angel and don't put it off - ask for help. I hope this has helped a little, voofy.
Be kind to yourself sweetie.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi guys!

Groan! :rolleyes: Get it?! .....
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

slowlyfading

Tiff wrote: »

sf - hi hunnie, how are you today? I know you said you were having a low time yesterday, angel and I've been thinking of you and wishing you well. You know where we are if you need us sf. You're not on your own, okay? Be kind to yourself hun.

I'm not good today I ended up cutting yesterday, which I'm now so annoyed at. I wanted 2009 to be the year I didn't do it, and only 5 days in proved too hard. -sigh- Thanks for your support Tiff, you're an angel. (((HUGS))) to you xx

whitevanwoman

Ok, got dressed, cleaned teeth, and tackled my washing machine. Couldn't find a way of emptying it without opening the door so I took a deep breath and went for it and despite the carefully placed line of buckets, I now have a skating rink in my utility room (it's an annex to the house and so it's not much warmer in there than it is outside).

It's stayed about minus 2 degrees today so my 4 wool jumpers which have been soaking in the dirty water in the washer for the past week are now drip-freezing on the washing line and I am developing another skating rink in the back yard. My cunning plan is to shake all the ice off them when they are well and truly frozen and then they'll be nearly dry!!! (yeah, right!).

And the good news? well, sadly there isn't any as the washer still isn't emptying nor spinning now. I've poured hot water through the pipe and its coming out the drain so it's not that the pipes are frozen after all. I guess I'm going to have to get someone in to fix it.

But I've also been outside stacking up logs for the fire and am feeling miles better than I have done for several weeks now - the fresh air and physical exercise has done me the world of good.

Off to see the doc in a minute. Hope everyone else has had an ok day - hugs to anyone who hasn't (and to those who have as well seeing as I'm in a hugging mood!) xx

beachbeth

You're right. Tiff is an angel. She makes me really wish this thread had been around in 1994 when I was first diagnosed with depression (I thought I was going mad before this!:o ) It would have helped so much in those bad times because I thought I was the only one.

Don't worry, Slowlyfading, you are only human. Just take each day as it comes. Don't think "I failed yesterday", think "Whatever has happened before, I won't fail today"

Haven't had very good sleep the past few nights. Im still waiting to hear if my benefit will be reinstated or if I will have to go to a tribunal and this is worrying me. Also, we had someone crash into our car over a year ago and it is still being sorted out. If justice is served my daughter and I will get compensation because it definitely wasn't our fault. But the main thing is that we get back the £600 excess we had to pay on our insurance and the £100 that the insurance company loaded on our policy this year because of these idiots that weren't looking where they were going!:mad: Until it is decided whose fault it is then we get nothing. Im sick of thinking about it now.

I used to think of life as a computer game and have always wished I could just choose an easier level than the one Im on! Why do us humans make life so difficult for each other?:rolleyes:

slowlyfading

beachbeth wrote: »

Don't worry, Slowlyfading, you are only human. Just take each day as it comes. Don't think "I failed yesterday", think "Whatever has happened before, I won't fail today"

Thanks and sending you (((HUGS))) as well xx

Amber_Sunshine

BizzyBek wrote: »

Accompanied Mum to hospital for an appointment. She had little one off bleed end of last year which the consultant says is all the hall marks of a h'roid but as she's of a certain age and we have a decent health trust here as routine they will send her for a bottom telescope (okay so that's not the proper name:rotfl: ) She gets herself very worked up about such things and me, whose had panic attacks etc should be sympathetic but tend to get short tempered instead, doh! A fortnight to go and hopefully it will all be done and dusted.

:rotfl: at 'bottom telescope', I had one of those recently. I also got worked up beforehand, even though I've had them before, but I can honestly say the preparation was more unpleasant than the test. I had to drink loads of that disgusting stuff the day before that cleans you out, boy was I glad that I had my own bathroom I don't know if your mum will have to do that, or get 'cleaned out' on the day, but the test itself is not that bad. She will be able to have sedation if she wants it, although I do without. It's not a very dignified experience, to be sure (especially when it's done by a young and handsome doc!), but it really isn't that bad, just a bit uncomfortable. So tell your mum from me that thinking about it is the the worst bit of the whole experience, it's not as bad as you think and will soon be over!