Weekly Flylady Thread 1st December 2008

toottifrootti

thought this might raise a smile or two!!!


A mature (over 40) lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.


Don't Mess With Mature Ladies !!!!!!!!

juliejim

DD's bedroom isn't finished but I've had enough of it for now. It's a lot better than it was so that's a start.

Might move onto the kitchen now and do a HHC in there.

juliejim

pigpen wrote: »

Weekend list..

A chance to get the other half and the children involved in your quest for world dominance a spick and span house.

1. Tidy your messiest room to level Three!
2. S&S the kitchen
3. S&S the bathroom
4. Change any bedding that has been missed this week
5. Wash any windows that are in need
6. [STRIKE]Clean out pets and cages and bedding etc[/STRIKE] DH has seen to the dogs
7. [STRIKE]Write and post those christmas cards[/STRIKE]Flylady ones done yesterday and posted
8. [STRIKE]Make a start on the christmas wrapping.[/STRIKE]
9. [STRIKE]HHI[/STRIKE]DH did some this morning - still plenty to do though.
10. Make sure lunch boxes and uniforms are ready for Monday

Just thought I'd see if I've done anything off the weekend list.

Craftyscholar

Pollybear wrote: »

craftyscholar - sorry about your cc. Hope it gets sorted soon. I meant to put earlier that I had to use my bank card reader for the first time a week or two ago. I had been putting if off (hate new technology) but it was really easy.
.

Thanks polly. I know it will be OK when I do it, but have just kept finding excuses - hate new things.

juliejim

Zoey - I hope you're still resting! Can your LO squeeze onto the sofa by the side of you? Then she can cuddle up to you but without putting pressure on your tummy.

SummerMoon

Lunch eaten and I am going on strike. Will do the pots from lunch, then refill the sink for DP to do the rest.
I am doing no more till kids bedtime.

froddington

So far today I have washed bathroom floor, done my shredding and taken it round to dad's, have one load of washing drying and another in the machine and have braved Sainsbury's (which was actually quite quiet!!). Oh, and dad dried my duvet cover in his TD and checked the lights on my car to save me getting in and out

Tuesday - Kitchen

Level One
Vacuum floor!

Level Three
Wash windows
Clean out a grotty cupboard

Extras

1. Clear and wipe windows sills

Friday - Living room, hall and stairs

Level one
Clear floors of clutter

Level Two
Wipe sofas
Vacuum floors.. hall stairs and living room!

Level Three
Wash windows

Extras

1. Binbag dance..

Weekend list..

1. Tidy your messiest room to level Three!
2. Write and post those christmas cards
3. HHI

My one-a-day (or 7-a-weekend!!) list:

- phone solicitor
- contact Union
- car checks

Valli

Afternoon ladies.
DS is feelingso much better...so much so that he has been on the PC for HOURS. DD has come back from visiting her dad overnight. She arrived at 2:30 and DEMANDED to be taken to town to buy a few bits. She has been told, in no uncertain terms, that I am not at her beck and call. I have also taken back the christmas cards I bought for her yesterday because I am so cross with her. I have told her I will not be spoken to like that. It's not on at all and I am not putting up with it.

ETA julie (((hugs))) re your DD ... when it was parents evening I pointed out to one boy's parents that their son was too quick to make comments which frankly were quite sarcastic, totally unneccessary and unacceptable...mum shot a look at dad and said 'that's you'... and the number of kids who use swear words...because they hear it at home. And I know that not ALL kids do this Pigpen - children need to learn how to behave and sometimes that takes a while..

ETA DD has just asked for 1 good reason why I won't take her then told me that she will apologise if I'll take her. I have told her she is to apologise because that's the right thing to do and not to expect a reward for it...

toottifrootti

Oh dear Valli thats not good - you are not alone thoufgh - there are several Mums having trouble with stroppy children!!!
Hugs for being strong!
toots xx

froddington

SummerMoon - hope you feel better soon and good luck for the training tomorrow

LL - enjoy your time with DS

soappie - maybe I shouldn't investigate Mindjolt .......... :rolleyes:

ZLS - little hugs for you - take it easy and don't go out, you need to rest

serena - hugs - hope you and DD feel better soon

lil_me - I did almost all of my shopping online too and am also waiting for lots of parcels

jjef - hugs for you too and you toochoosey
angel - :T well done

rach - good luck with your plan - I need to losr a few stone too but have decided to leave it until the new year and then make a determined effort. Too much temptation at the time of year

Is pigpen ok? Not heard from her for a while

HHC 3:30 - 4:00 anyone?

I need to attack the kitchen..............