Weekly Flylady Thread 24th November 2008

Flylady_Flower

Loved the Jokes Valli - you've got rid of all the gobbldygoooke now though and half of them are missing? Are you still working on it?

Valli

Yes I am going to copy the whole lot into word and do it from there...

So I have scrubbed that one ***points up the thread*** and re done it ***points down the thread***

Flylady_Flower

Valli wrote: »

Yes I am going to copy the whole lot into word and do it from there...

Great, I hate it when it does that...;)

soappie

pigpen wrote: »

What room shall we start with tomorrow??? I can't decide.. my whole house is a pit!

I bet if I said NOT the bathroom please, you'd make sure it was!

Valli

Some of the worst jokes you'll ever hear

1. Two blondes walk into a building.......... you'd think at least one of them would have seen it

2. Phone answering machine message - "...If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key..."

3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts.The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."

4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."

6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.

7. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied "I know you can't, I've cut your arms off".

8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.

9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

10. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.

11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says "I'll give you some cream to put on it."

12. 'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home'"That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. ' Is it common? ' "It's not unusual."

13. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a
look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy"

14. Guy goes into the doctor's. "Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside." ..."How's that?" "Don't you start."

15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!

16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

17. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'

18. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my
Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu? But I think its Colin.

19. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other "Your round." The other one says "So are you, you fat bast**d!"

20. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

21. "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.'So that was nice."

22. A man walked into the doctors, he said, "I've hurt my arm in several places" The doctor said, "Well don't go there anymore"

hex2

Hippy110 wrote: »

I do (another Lancashire lass here) - shows my age, family favourite was Big Jim!! But there is a modern equivalent now - The Lancashire Hotpots http://www.myspace.com/thelancashirehotpots

Thanks for this - just listening to 'I fear Ikea'.

My little boys are word perfect on 'where theres muck theres brass', and we also like Jake Thackeray, good sing along music for the car.

Ironing is done, boys are in bed and I now have a bad case of CBA.

Suggestions for Monday? Declare it a day off, how much worse can it get?

juliejim

Right I'm off to bed and hopefully I won't wake up at a silly time in the morning!

Pink_Fairy_2

Valli - :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

DD is back from her RSC weekend. I picked her up at 2 and she slept till 6 when we had dinner, but helped clear up and put some washing in the machine.
She's thoroughly enjoyed herself, and did really well on everything except the run, 18 minutes and she needs to do it in 15 or less, so she'll need to work on that. She's already looking forward to the next on.

pigpen

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Triker

Pink_Fairy wrote: »

Good morning all,

Been awake since 6, but read until 8.

Done my dailies and thinking I might get the ironing out of the way while DS is still in bed.


I know the real one coz we did that in A & P! - Deoxyribonucleic acid

Triker, Valli - I know Farnworth and Halliwell! :j My brother was born in Bolton (181 Green Lane, I'll have you know!), and I went to St Simon and St Jude's primary school. We used to go up Rivington Pike for picnics in the summer.

My sister and I love tracking Santa with Norad (she's 53 and I'm 50 )! :T I think we embarrass my two.

Right anyone for a :coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee: while I'm setting the ironing board up. Gonna watch the Corrie omnibus DS recorded for me yesterday.

Sent you a PM, amazing.:D