It is tough NOW. So how are we coping

sammy_kaye18

I made My Own Luck - hope your dd and her dh manage ok and sort themselves out soon enough.

Like I said previously we have a role reversal in my family - my mum struggled for years to bring up two girls as a single parent and then she got herself a boyfriend and he has put her right back into debt at square one to the point she's now looking at declaring herself bankrupt but thankfully she is rid of him so hoping she will be able to sort herself out again and as much as I wish I could help her out we are not financially well off either and are barely scrapping by each month.

Not a nice place to be but hoping things will get better - now if only the bills would all stop!

sillyinthepast

Hi there I'm new to this thread is it ok to join? We are really struggling at the moment. We have enough to last but no extra for anything and I have my childrens birthdays coming up. So in order to gain some extra money I have been doing all of my cooking from scratch, baking bread, repairing clothes etc. What I would like to try is the washing liquid. It says to grate a bar of soap, sorry if I sound dim but what kind of soap?

nuttybabe

sillyinthepast wrote: »

Hi there I'm new to this thread is it ok to join? We are really struggling at the moment. We have enough to last but no extra for anything and I have my childrens birthdays coming up. So in order to gain some extra money I have been doing all of my cooking from scratch, baking bread, repairing clothes etc. What I would like to try is the washing liquid. It says to grate a bar of soap, sorry if I sound dim but what kind of soap?

any soap. my first lot was made out of soap that was free from a hotel, my second lot I used the asda smart price soap. My friend uses household cleaning soap for hers.

sillyinthepast

Thank you nutty babe x

Chipps

I have always kept the ends of soap - you know, the bits that look horrible in the bathroom & have gone cracked & yucky. When I have made gloop, the tin of odds & ends is ransacked.

Belle1990

rockie4 wrote: »

I had my ‘lightbulb moment’ many years ago when I got into serious debt:eek: and went to CCCS for help. Debts were cleared earlier this year BUT OH is not working, he is awaiting a mental health assessment for a long term problem, unfortunately he has gaps in his NI record so we get no sick benefit or any other benefits and have to live on my wage.!:doh:
I picked up a lot of OS tips from my dear old Mum, when she died I found a notebook with hints and tips in but have got loads more off here.

Heating – we have throws on all the chairs to snuggle under, microwavable beanbags to keep the old back warm, extra warm quilt on the bed with a thin one as a mattress topper. Curtains/door curtains shut at dusk to keep the warmth in.Heating goes on for an hour or so in the evening and perhaps a couple of hours at the weekend to help get the washing dry. OH does the cleaning for me, I introduced him to Flylady:D , that keeps him warm in the day!!!

I batch cook for the freezer .I’m veggie and OH eats whatever I put in front of him! We hardly ever have takeaway, I keep a couple of Asda pizza’s and a bag of spicy wedges for nights I’m out and OH needs to feed himself and so far have had a takeout curry twice this year.
We have an allotment and grow allsorts! It kept us going all summer and I’ve only just run out of onions and potatoes – next years plan is to try and have something all the year round.
OH bakes bread by hand, he won’t have a breadmaker, we still buy value white thick sliced for toast though.:o

I drive to work,:o I tried public transport but it added 2 hours to my working day and I was exhausted, I also prefer to shop on the way home rather than make a separate journey. I tried online shopping but I prefer to do my list on My Supermarket then shop on the way home, I pass all the main supermarkets on my way so can shop wherever is cheapest.
I’m lucky that I get hugely subsidised parking in the city centre through work and can use it at weekends if I want, I also get subsidised swim/gym use at the leisure centre next to work which saves me a lot.
OH has a bike or walks.:D

We manage quite well, I'm not worried about the 'credit crunch' having survived the last recession by the skin of my teeth:eek: I do get a bit fed up some times but that's usually resolved with a glass (or 2) of wine That's something which I won't give up!!

rockie - that a great tip your mum had. I am going to buy a small notebook to keep all these great tips in. I forget things so quickly....

clairehi

IMadeMyOwnLuck wrote: »

This `learning from your own mistakes` is a killer when you watch your dd and her dh suffering. You can tell them and hint about staying in the comfort zone but at the same time you have to be careful not to cross into the nagging or interfering zones

The situation here involves 2 people in `good` jobs and 2 little ones at nursery, now the carpet has started to slip from under one of them re salary ( in spite of having a professional job after 5 years at uni). Nice house but most definitely not posh as they were always appreciative of second hand stuff. 2 biggish dogs. Not incredibly tidy as they are just about coping. Trouble is the large mortgage and optimism when they bought.

I have always said to stay in the comfort zone after having worn the t shirt many years ago. So now we have to sit back and see if they can sort themselves out, selling isn`t an option just now

We did a similar thing just once 38 years ago and bought a nice detached house in a close but we could hardly afford the mortgage. We got out after 6 months and went to a semi and managed to `live` again

Children!!!! even in adulthood

The thing is, 20:20 hindsight is a wonderful thing isnt it. We were cautious (staying in the comfort zone) when we bought our first house 10 years ago and really, it was too small for us from day one. prices rocketed shortly after we bought so we would have been better to stretch ourselves as it cost us more to move up the property ladder later.

This is by way of saying that you are damned if you do, damned if you dont sometimes, noone can predict the property market for sure so dont kick youself/your offspring about it - Im sure they made the best decision based on the information they had at the time, but things have changed - fingers crossed it works out for them

lilac_lady

Although I walk the MSE walk I know that my grownup children are not so great at economising. It's hard to say nothing when there's 3 takeaway meals a week and an unused slow cooker (gifted by me). They take their children to a play place (£4 per child) when they have a large garden complete with chute, swings etc and the house is full of large plastic (unused) toys.

I realise that their way of life is not mine so my lips are sealed. No matter how old our children are, most of us still worry about them.

Pitlanepiglet

*big sigh*, just as I was managing to get the books balanced, I managed to put my car in a ditch on Friday night in pea soup fog....in my defence it's my first accident in 23 years (other than someone running into the back of me at traffic lights 2 years ago).

Had to get the Police out as I was blocking a side lane and then a recovery truck to winch the car out of the ditch at a cost of over £200! (I have breakdown cover but they charge if it's an accident) but at least the insurers will pick that up.

I've bullied the insurers into letting it go to my usual garage and they are going to do what they can to avoid it being a write off, It's 8 years old and I've had it from new but it's value is only around £1500-£2000 and I've damaged the front bumper, fog lamp at least one headlight, possibly the bonnet, it was difficult to see in the dark. The garage are happy that it's likely to be easily repairable at with new parts it's going to be expensive so I think we'll have a fight on our hands. I really don't want to lose the car and there is no way I can afford to replace it.

It's a good job that MSE has taught me never to count our chickens before they are hatched. Next month we should have had some left over money and we want to replace our collection of manky freezers with a decent chest freezer. A few years ago I would have bought the freezer on my CC and then waited to be able to pay for it. Now I was waiting to have the money so at least I should be able to scrape together the money for the £300 excess.

Still at least I wasn't hurt and I didn't hit anyone else, I just kinda slid in having locked up on the loose road surface. Feel very cross though :mad:

kidcat

Ahhh pitlanepiglet sending big hugs. These things always happen when we need it least IYSWIM. Have you considered freecycle for a chest freezer. Loads of people get rid of them as families grow and theres usually a free up each week on our local board. If the car is looking to be a write off using new parts - is there any way your mechanic would look at second hand? I damaged the bumper on our Espace when we had it and picked up a second hand one for £15 when a new one was over £400! Lights are usually much cheaper too, the advantage being that ythe parts you buy are usually all same age as your car so nothing stands out as being brand new - and if you manage to get body panels in same colour it saves the cost of paint too!! My OH didnt close the bonnet on my little car properly after checking oil etc and when he was driving down the motorway the bonnet flew open. Luckily he managed to stop safely but the bonnet and a few other bits were damaged, our mechanic sourced used replacements in the same coour and the bill came in less than £100 - which was less than our excess too!