My mate

paybacktime2008

cornishinfens wrote: »

We all know what they are doing is wrong, however, they could be living in denial, trying to maintain a lifestyle they can't support - but when loose cash comes available they use it to fulfill the lifestyle they can't afford. So So true, when the next cheque comes in its all hunky dory for a while but the 'bad times' are getting more frequent and... well....badder. She had money coming in the next day and just couldnt see what the issue was. Er, your mortgage arrears, your leccy bill, your broken boiler??????

I think to a lesser or greater degree a lot of us have done that before we hit our light bulb moment.

It Think that if you have a solid friendship a sit down over a mug of (not too hot) tea and a chat about it. If they are not careful they may lose everything... We all know its hard being frugal and dealing with debt at first - but with time things get better (if not out nails and eyebrows)
But as a bloke i tend to let my eyebrows and nails do their own thing. She knows she is in the poo, but its a bit like helping an alcoholic no-one can help them until the try to help themselves.
Im sure that if she is desperate to get her eyes and nails done she can get a load of girlfriends together for a "at home" pampering party

Gonna stop there before my thoughts become unclean!!!

Want to share your hair removal fetish! lol

SingleSue

I wish I had nails to get done!

I am one of those who will go without so the children can eat etc, so I have not had my haircut at a hairdressers for over a year...mind you, I have become quite handy at weilding the scissors myself now!

Any treats I want for myself (massage etc), I ask for as vouchers for birthday/christmas, gives the person giving a sense of satisfaction as I am actually using the present on myself (I always use to use the cash presents for bills etc or sell the item to raise cash to pay bills etc) and of course, me the pleasure of a nice relaxing treat without feeling guilty.

bargainbetty

I had this too. A friend of mine asked for money (food for the kids etc) for the fifth week running. Instead of the money, I went shopping and bought enough food to feed her, her partner and their three kids for a week.When I got in and started unpacking the bags, her partner looked me up and down and said 'What? You didn't pick me up any fags?'

I looked at her, said 'Never again' and stuck to it.

Another friend borrowed money with the promise of paying it back 'on payday'. Four times so far, plus three requests to use my credit card as she doesn't have one (she'll pay me back in cash, honestly). A week after the first occasion she was playing pool with a new personalised cue, but couldn't afford to give me the £50 back....

Last time she asked I said that I had got rid of the credit card, and if she wanted me to use my debit card then she could pay the cash in at her local branch and I'd do it once the money was there. Funnily enough, she found another way to do it.

Just say no. When you are struggling, it's not fair on you. Make them a meal by all means, but explain why you won't give her any more money.

Good luck x

Jesthar

Indulge her one last time - give her a cheap pair of tweezers acompanied by a suggestion she needs to get her priorities straight... :mad:

Does she have any other people she asks to borrow money off? If so, they need to join in on this, and also refuse to help out any more. I have a nasty feeling she's going to need a shock of that kind and size to jolt her back into reality. Now there's a thought - think you could trick her into doing a Statement of Affairs?