Tv Licencing Idiots!

callansdad

Thought i would give some of you a giggle ... this is the letter i sent to tv licencing after they sent me a demand for payment (bought my licence 5 months ago)

Dear Incompetent Idiots,

I am writing to you in order to make an official complaint regarding the enclosed letter which I received yesterday.

If any of you had even bothered to get off of your lazy !!!!!! and check my address you would see that I do already have a TV Licence.

In respect of paragraph one of your letter, it is none of your bloody business where I shop, when I shop and what I purchase. In fact as you are so interested in my shopping habits it may interest you to know that I recently purchased a lovely blow up doll by the name of Linda and we currently enjoy many a night sitting watching our television together, which by the way (in case I didn’t already mention it) we have a licence for.

In respect of paragraph two of your letter, may I remind you that it is also against the law to make false criminal allegations against someone in this country.

In respect of paragraph three of your letter, although my lovely friend Linda resides with me here I can assure you that the TV licence is in my name.

In respect of paragraph four of your letter, please feel free to send round your ‘enforcement officers’ (ooh big scary name), who have about as many rights to enforce anything as my lovely friend Linda. Who would be happy to meet them also.

In respect of paragraph five of your letter, ‘one quick call is all it takes’ you say. Just let me reiterate that if any of the thousands of people that are no doubt employed by you had bothered to do their job correctly and actually check your ‘database’ then no doubt you would not have wasted countless amounts of TV licensing money sending out more of these pointless letters!

Let me just close my by saying that if you are going to send me a letter blaming this on a computer error (as you usually do), can I remind you that computers only do what they are told to do. And please please please, for the sake of the sanity of every human being in this country, STOP employing monkeys, elephants and any other form of incompetent buffoons because they are obviously not worth the wages or peanuts you pay them!

Yours sincerely,

calleyw

:rotfl:

I do agree they are muppets I don't have TV. And when I move back in March the person who moved out changed there details on the licence. So it trigged the letters saying I don't have a licence.

So I rang them up and said "Your enforcement officers are welcome to pop around anytime" Funny that was about a month ago and I am still waiting a visit from them.

Will not hold my breath on that one.

Surely it is up to them to prove I have a TV not me having to prove I don't.

Bet they think I am strange but hey ho that is their problem.


Yours

Calley

madfrenchgirl

yeah, when I purchased a telly from Currys, I checked with my landlord (i live in lodgings) if I was covered for TV license under his name. So i bought the telly and straight away I received a letter from them saying I had bought a telly and needed to pay license for it unless I could prove someone else at my address had already paid for it> DUH! Check your database and the address you will see there is already someone here! Plus, the telly could have been a git for a friend! They really are a bunch of morons!

Wig

I've been waiting about 2years for the enforcement officers who "will interview me and take statements" no less. They are always supposed to be "in my area" and likely to call at my address in the next month or so.

I always enjoy closing the door in their face. Oh and do mind the ice, careful you don't slip and break your neck.

Dora_the_Explorer_5

This might, only might, be a moneysaving idea (which should in no way be construed as financial advice!).
Quite a while ago Jonathon Miller had a column in the Sunday Times which was linked to a website he'd set up for tv licence refuseniks, which suggested that people stop buying a licence when they reached the age of 75 as they were hardly ever taken to court as free licences kick in at 80 and taking pensioners of this age to court would not be good PR.
If you have a local weekly newspaper which carries reports of tv licence prosecutions they usually give the age of the 'criminal'. I haven't seen any over 60 in mine, never mind over 70!
Roll on my 75th birthday !!!

derrick

The following statement was taken from HERE so it looks like you do need a seperate licence.

I'm a lodger - do I need a licence?

If you watch TV in your room, you need a separate TV Licence.

This is the case unless you have a relationship with the licence holder, for example if you are:

• A member of the family
• A common law partner
• A live-in employee such as a nanny, au pair or housekeeper.

Please note: if you live in self-contained accommodation such as a separate flat or annexe, you will need your own separate TV Licence regardless of your relationship with the home owner.

madfrenchgirl

well he sorted it out, and I dont live there anymore! lol

and I have been living in lodging for most of my life and landlords were providing for my telly, does it mean I have to pay for the past five years of my life? Yeah right!

santana-mx3

callansdad wrote:

And please please please, for the sake of the sanity of every human being in this country, STOP employing monkeys, elephants and any other form of incompetent buffoons because they are obviously not worth the wages or peanuts you pay them!

Hey! Less of the insults to elephants if you don't mind!

Number_6_3

They are complete idiots...got a couple of cheques from them yesterday because I needed a license cancelling, and another one changing the name on it.

The fools managed to cancel the wrong license. This is despite 2 letters, their forms being filled out, and confirmation over the phone several times.

Must admit I did ask them not to send threatening harrassing letters to me as I would inform them if I ever needed a license.

R

Wig

derrick wrote:

The following statement was taken from HERE so it looks like you do need a seperate licence.

But it does depend on where the TV is located so not always.

webmasterpolo

I got one of those letters from them after I moved into my new home. Been paying via DD for years and I updated my address to take effect from the date I moved in.

Wrote to them saying basically the same as you did...not quiet as funny and insulting but certainly having a right go at them for threatening me with court action when they have my details on their database. Asked them for compensation for my wasted time and their incompetence.

Got an apology letter and cheque for £5 comp.

Will repeat this if it happens again, only another 23 times and my licence will be free...lol

-Web